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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Apr 2:2 Aš žinau tavo darbus, tavo triūsą ir tavo ištvermę. Žinau, kad tu negali pakęsti piktųjų ir ištyrei tuos, kurie sakosi esą apaštalai, bet tokie nėra, ir radai juos esant melagius.
Re 2:2 I know thy works, and thy labour, and thy patience, and how thou canst not bear them which are evil: and thou hast tried them which say they are apostles, and are not, and hast found them liars:
1Kar 1:13 Tučtuojau eik pas karalių Dovydą ir sakyk: ‘Mano viešpatie karaliau, argi neprisiekei savo tarnaitei, tardamas: "Po manęs tavo sūnus Saliamonas bus karaliumi, jis sėdės mano soste"? Tad kodėl Adonijas tapo karaliumi? ’
1Ki 1:13 Go and get thee in unto king David, and say unto him, Didst not thou, my lord, O king, swear unto thine handmaid, saying, Assuredly Solomon thy son shall reign after me, and he shall sit upon my throne? why then doth Adonijah reign?
Lk 8:38 Vyras, iš kurio buvo išėję demonai, prašėsi paliekamas pas Jėzų. Tačiau jis atleido jį ir paliepė:
Lu 8:38 Now the man out of whom the devils were departed besought him that he might be with him: but Jesus sent him away, saying,
Ps 25:7 ח Mano jaunystės nuodėmes ir kaltes užmiršk; savo ištikima meile dėl savo gerumoatmink mane, Viešpatie!
Ps 25:7 Remember not the sins of my youth, nor my transgressions: according to thy mercy remember thou me for thy goodness' sake, O LORD.
Fil 2:27 O jis buvo arti mirties, tačiau Dievas jo pasigailėjo, ir ne vien tik jo, bet ir manęs, kad manęs neužgriūtų sielvartas po sielvarto.
Phil 2:27 For indeed he was sick nigh unto death: but God had mercy on him; and not on him only, but on me also, lest I should have sorrow upon sorrow.
Mch 1:3 Žiūrėkite! Viešpats palieka savo buveinę, jis nužengs ir eis žemės aukštumomis.
Mic 1:3 For, behold, the LORD cometh forth out of his place, and will come down, and tread upon the high places of the earth.
Lk 4:10 nes parašyta: Jis palieps savo angelams sergėti taveir dar:
Lu 4:10 For it is written, He shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee:
Iz 24:7 Vynmedžiai vysta, jauno vyno trūksta; kam džiūgavo širdis, tas dabar dūsauja.
Isa 24:7 The new wine mourneth, the vine languisheth, all the merryhearted do sigh.
Sk 28:21 o su kiekvienu iš septynių avinėlių atnašausite dešimtadalį.
Nu 28:21 A several tenth deal shalt thou offer for every lamb, throughout the seven lambs:
Sk 10:36 O kai tik ji būdavo padedama poilsio, jis sakydavo: "Sugrįžk, Viešpatie, prie nesuskaitomų Izraelio tūkstančių! "
Nu 10:36 And when it rested, he said, Return, O LORD, unto the many thousands of Israel.
Kun 13:7 Bet jei po to, kai pasirodė kunigui ir buvo pripažintas esąs švarus, išbėrimas plėstųsi, jis turi vėl pasirodyti kunigui.
Le 13:7 But if the scab spread much abroad in the skin, after that he hath been seen of the priest for his cleansing, he shall be seen of the priest again.
1Kar 18:27 Atėjus vidudieniui, Elijas iš jų pasityčiojo, sakydamas: "Šaukite garsiau! Juk jis dievas! Arba jis užsisvajojo, arba paėjėjo į pakelę, arba keliauja, arba galbūt užmigo ir turi būti pažadintas. "
1Ki 18:27 And it came to pass at noon, that Elijah mocked them, and said, Cry aloud: for he is a god; either he is talking, or he is pursuing, or he is in a journey, or peradventure he sleepeth, and must be awaked.
Jer 2:17 Ar ne todėl, kad tu palikai Viešpatį, savo Dievą?
Jer 2:17 Hast thou not procured this unto thyself, in that thou hast forsaken the LORD thy God, when he led thee by the way?
Rom 2:17 Štai tu vadiniesi žydas, pasikliauji įstatymu ir giriesi Dievu.
Ro 2:17 Behold, thou art called a Jew, and restest in the law, and makest thy boast of God,
Apr 4:3 Jo išvaizda buvo panaši į jaspio ir sardžio brangakmenius, o vaivorykštė, juosianti sostą, buvo panaši į smaragdą.
Re 4:3 And he that sat was to look upon like a jasper and a sardine stone: and there was a rainbow round about the throne, in sight like unto an emerald.
Mk 10:42 Pasišaukęs mokinius, Jėzus prabilo: "Jūs žinote, kad tie, kurie laikomi tautų valdovais, engia jas, ir jų didžiūnai rodo joms savo galią.
Mar 10:42 But Jesus called them to him, and saith unto them, Ye know that they which are accounted to rule over the Gentiles exercise lordship over them; and their great ones exercise authority upon them.
1Sam 26:14 Dovydas pašaukė karius ir Nero sūnų Abnerą, tardamas: "Abnerai! Ar neatsiliepsi? " Atsiliepdamas Abneras sušuko: "Kas tu esi, kad rėkauji karaliui? "
1Sa 26:14 And David cried to the people, and to Abner the son of Ner, saying, Answerest thou not, Abner? Then Abner answered and said, Who art thou that criest to the king?
Rom 9:29 Izaijas nusakė iš anksto: Jei Galybių Viešpats nebūtų mums ainijos palikęs, būtume pasidarę kaip Sodoma, būtume į Gomorą panašūs.
Ro 9:29 And as Esaias said before, Except the Lord of Sabaoth had left us a seed, we had been as Sodoma, and been made like unto Gomorrha.
Ps 119:134 Atpirk mane nuo žmonių, kurie mane engia, kad laikyčiausi tavo įsakų.
Ps 119:134 Deliver me from the oppression of man: so will I keep thy precepts.
Neh 7:8 Parošo palikuonių du tūkstančiai šimtas septyniasdešimt du,
Ne 7:8 The children of Parosh, two thousand an hundred seventy and two.

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