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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Lk 18:30 kuris jau šiuo metu negautų nepalyginti daugiau, o būsimajame pasaulyje ­ amžinojo gyvenimo. "
Lu 18:30 Who shall not receive manifold more in this present time, and in the world to come life everlasting.
Ez 21:31 Išliesiu savo įnirtį ant tavęs, savo pykčio ugnimi papūsiu į tave. Atiduosiu tave į rankas nuožmiems žmonėms, įgudusiems niokoti.
Eze 21:31 And I will pour out mine indignation upon thee, I will blow against thee in the fire of my wrath, and deliver thee into the hand of brutish men, and skilful to destroy.
Lk 3:12 Ėjo ir muitininkai krikštytis ir klausė: "Mokytojau, o ką mums daryti? "
Lu 3:12 Then came also publicans to be baptized, and said unto him, Master, what shall we do?
1Kor 16:24 Mano meilė jums visiems Kristuje Jėzuje!
1C 16:24 My love be with you all in Christ Jesus. Amen.
Jer 22:9 jiems bus atsakyta: ‘Todėl, kad jie atsimetė nuo Sandoros su Viešpačiu, savo Dievu, garbino kitus dievus ir jiems tarnavo. ’"
Jer 22:9 Then they shall answer, Because they have forsaken the covenant of the LORD their God, and worshipped other gods, and served them.
Įst 23:24 Kai įžengsi į kaimyno vynuogyną, gali valgyti vynuogių iki soties, bet į savo indą nieko nesidėsi.
De 23:24 When thou comest into thy neighbour's vineyard, then thou mayest eat grapes thy fill at thine own pleasure; but thou shalt not put any in thy vessel.
Iz 34:15 Šokli angis ten kraus sau lizdą, dės kiaušinius, perės vaikus iraugins juos savo paunksmėje. Būriuosis ten ir pesliai, kiekvienas ­ su savo patele.
Isa 34:15 There shall the great owl make her nest, and lay, and hatch, and gather under her shadow: there shall the vultures also be gathered, every one with her mate.
Lk 10:35 Kitą dieną jis išsiėmė du denarus, padavė užeigos šeimininkui ir tarė: ‘Slaugyk jį, o jeigu išleisi ką viršaus, sugrįžęs aš tau atsilyginsiu. ’
Lu 10:35 And on the morrow when he departed, he took out two pence, and gave them to the host, and said unto him, Take care of him; and whatsoever thou spendest more, when I come again, I will repay thee.
Pat 17:7 Kilnūs žodžiai netinka kvailajam, juo labiau ­ melas kilmingajam!
Pr 17:7 Excellent speech becometh not a fool: much less do lying lips a prince.
Mk 9:47 O jei tave gundo nusidėti tavoji akis, išlupk ją, nes verčiau tau vienakiui įeiti į Dievo karalystę, negu su abiem akim būti įmestam į pragarą,
Mar 9:47 And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire:
Mt 19:3 Tuomet pas jį atėjo fariziejų. Spęsdami pinkles, jie paklausė: "Ar galima vyrui dėl kokios nors priežasties atleisti žmoną? "
Mat 19:3 The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?
Hab 2:3 Nustatytu laiku regėjimas išsipildys, o dabar jis skuba į tikslą ir nemeluoja. Jei atrodo, kad jis gaišuoja, palauk; jis tikrai išsipildys ir nesuvėluos. "
Hab 2:3 For the vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall speak, and not lie: though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry.
Rom 14:1 Silpno tikėjimo žmogų priimkite, tik venkite ginčų dėl skirtingų nuomonių.
Ro 14:1 Him that is weak in the faith receive ye, but not to doubtful disputations.
Ps 89:45 Sutrumpinai jo jaunystės dienas, užtraukei jam gėdą. Sela.
Ps 89:45 The days of his youth hast thou shortened: thou hast covered him with shame. Selah.
Zch 1:4 Nebūkite kaip jūsų protėviai, kuriems ankstesni pranašai skelbė: ‘Taip kalba Galybių Viešpats. Gręžkitės nuo savo nedorų kelių ir nedorų darbų. ’ Bet jie nei manęs klausė, nei manęs paisė, ­ tai Viešpaties žodis.
Zec 1:4 Be ye not as your fathers, unto whom the former prophets have cried, saying, Thus saith the LORD of hosts; Turn ye now from your evil ways, and from your evil doings: but they did not hear, nor hearken unto me, saith the LORD.
Iš 6:6 Todėl sakyk izraelitams: ‘Aš esu Viešpats! Išlaisvinsiu jus iš egiptiečių lažo ir išgelbėsiu iš jų vergijos. Atpirksiu jus pakelta ranka ir teismo rykštėmis.
Ex 6:6 Wherefore say unto the children of Israel, I am the LORD, and I will bring you out from under the burdens of the Egyptians, and I will rid you out of their bondage, and I will redeem you with a stretched out arm, and with great judgments:
Mk 1:19 Paėjėjęs truputį toliau, jis pamatė Zebediejaus sūnų Jokūbą ir jo brolį Joną, valtyje betaisančius tinklus.
Mar 1:19 And when he had gone a little farther thence, he saw James the son of Zebedee, and John his brother, who also were in the ship mending their nets.
1Sam 31:12 visi jų ištikimi vyrai leidosi į kelionę ir, žygiavę visą naktį, nuėmė Sauliaus kūną ir jo sūnų kūnus nuo Bet Šeano sienos. Parnešę į Jabešą, ten juos sudegino.
1Sa 31:12 All the valiant men arose, and went all night, and took the body of Saul and the bodies of his sons from the wall of Bethshan, and came to Jabesh, and burnt them there.
Apd 24:21 Nebent tik žodžius, kuriuos šaukiau, stovėdamas tarp jų: ‘Šiandien jūs mane teisiate už mirusiųjų prisikėlimą! ’"
Ac 24:21 Except it be for this one voice, that I cried standing among them, Touching the resurrection of the dead I am called in question by you this day.
Pr 31:26 "Ką tu padarei, ­ Labanas tarė Jokūbui, ­ apgavai mane ir tarsi kalaviju pasigrobei mano dukteris į nelaisvę? !
Ge 31:26 And Laban said to Jacob, What hast thou done, that thou hast stolen away unawares to me, and carried away my daughters, as captives taken with the sword?

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