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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Joz 3:1 Kitą rytą anksti Jozuė ir visi izraelitai pakilo iš Šitimų ir nužygiavo prie Jordano. Tuojau pat jie nepersikėlė, bet apsistojo.
Jos 3:1 And Joshua rose early in the morning; and they removed from Shittim, and came to Jordan, he and all the children of Israel, and lodged there before they passed over.
1Sam 1:13 Ona meldėsi širdimi. Judėjo tik lūpos, bet balso nebuvo girdėti. Elis pamanė, kad ji girta.
1Sa 1:13 Now Hannah, she spake in her heart; only her lips moved, but her voice was not heard: therefore Eli thought she had been drunken.
1Kar 20:27 Ir izraelitai buvo pašaukti prie ginklų, aprūpinti maistu ir išėjo prieš juos į mūšį. Pasistatę stovyklą priešais aramėjus, izraelitai atrodė tarsi dvi ožkų kaimenės, tuo tarpu aramėjai pripildė visą kraštą.
1Ki 20:27 And the children of Israel were numbered, and were all present, and went against them: and the children of Israel pitched before them like two little flocks of kids; but the Syrians filled the country.
Apd 9:25 bet jo mokiniai nakčia virvėmis nuleido jį per sieną pintinėje.
Ac 9:25 Then the disciples took him by night, and let him down by the wall in a basket.
Įst 23:21 Kai padarai įžadą Viešpačiui, savo Dievui, nedelsk jį įvykdyti, nes Viešpats, tavo Dievas, tikrai iš tavęs jo pareikalaus, ir tu užsitrauksi kaltę.
De 23:21 When thou shalt vow a vow unto the LORD thy God, thou shalt not slack to pay it: for the LORD thy God will surely require it of thee; and it would be sin in thee.
Job 13:8 Argi būsite jam šališkiir stosite byloje už Dievą?
Job 13:8 Will ye accept his person? will ye contend for God?
Sk 34:9 Tada riba nusidrieks iki Zifrono ir baigsis prie Hacar Enano. Tai bus jūsų šiaurinė riba.
Nu 34:9 And the border shall go on to Ziphron, and the goings out of it shall be at Hazarenan: this shall be your north border.
1Kor 7:15 Bet, jei netikintis nori skirtis, tegul atsiskiria. Tokiais atvejais brolis ar sesuo nėra susieti, nes Dievas yra mus pašaukęs santaikai.
1C 7:15 But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.
Sk 34:22 iš Dano giminės ­ vadas Joglio sūnus Bukis,
Nu 34:22 And the prince of the tribe of the children of Dan, Bukki the son of Jogli.
Pr 27:26 Tuomet jo tėvas Izaokas tarė jam: "Mano sūnau, eikš arčiau ir pabučiuok mane. "
Ge 27:26 And his father Isaac said unto him, Come near now, and kiss me, my son.
Sk 7:13 Jo atnaša buvo sidabro dubuo, sveriantis šimtą trisdešimt šekelių, sidabro taurė, sverianti septyniasdešimt šekelių pagal šventyklos šekelį ­ abu pilni geriausių miltų, įmaišytų aliejumi, javų atnašai, ­
Nu 7:13 And his offering was one silver charger, the weight thereof was an hundred and thirty shekels, one silver bowl of seventy shekels, after the shekel of the sanctuary; both of them were full of fine flour mingled with oil for a meat offering:
Jer 7:24 Bet jie nei paklausė, nei paisė. Jie sekė paskui savo pačių užmačias, savo nedorų širdžių užsispyrimą, atsukdami man nugarą, o ne veidą.
Jer 7:24 But they hearkened not, nor inclined their ear, but walked in the counsels and in the imagination of their evil heart, and went backward, and not forward.
Pat 14:8 Gudraus žmogaus išmintis padeda jam protingai elgtis, o bukapročio kvailumas klaidina jį.
Pr 14:8 The wisdom of the prudent is to understand his way: but the folly of fools is deceit.
Apd 9:4 Nukritęs žemėn, jis išgirdo balsą: "Sauliau, Sauliau, kam mane persekioji? "
Ac 9:4 And he fell to the earth, and heard a voice saying unto him, Saul, Saul, why persecutest thou me?
Pr 27:1 Kai Izaokas jau buvo senas, o jo akys taip aptemusios, kad nebegalėjo matyti, jis pasišaukė savo vyresnįjį sūnų ir tarė jam: "Mano sūnau! " Šis atsiliepė: "Aš čia. "
Ge 27:1 And it came to pass, that when Isaac was old, and his eyes were dim, so that he could not see, he called Esau his eldest son, and said unto him, My son: and he said unto him, Behold, here am I.
Ps 133:1 Pakopų giesmė. Dovydo. Žiūrėk, kaip gera ir malonu, kur broliai gyvena vienybėje!
Ps 133:1 Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!
Įst 26:17 Šiandien tu patvirtinai, kad Viešpats yra tavo Dievas, kad eisi jo keliais, laikysiesi jo įstatų, įsakymų bei įsakų ir klausysi jo balso.
De 26:17 Thou hast avouched the LORD this day to be thy God, and to walk in his ways, and to keep his statutes, and his commandments, and his judgments, and to hearken unto his voice:
Job 36:25 Visa žmonija mato Dievo darbus, kiekvienas žvelgia į jį iš toli.
Job 36:25 Every man may see it; man may behold it afar off.
1Tim 6:12 Kovok gerąją tikėjimo kovą, pagauk amžinąjį gyvenimą, kuriam esi pašauktas ir kuriam pateikei gerą išpažinimą daugelio liudytojų akyse.
1Ti 6:12 Fight the good fight of faith, lay hold on eternal life, whereunto thou art also called, and hast professed a good profession before many witnesses.
Pr 11:17 Pelegui gimus, Eberas gyveno keturis šimtus trisdešimt metų ir turėjo kitų sūnų bei dukterų.
Ge 11:17 And Eber lived after he begat Peleg four hundred and thirty years, and begat sons and daughters.

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