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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Pat 8:31 džiūgaudama jo gyvenamame pasaulyje, rasdama džiaugsmo žmonijoje.
Pr 8:31 Rejoicing in the habitable part of his earth; and my delights were with the sons of men.
1Kor 7:9 Bet jei negali susilaikyti, tegul tuokiasi. Verčiau tuoktis negu degti.
1C 7:9 But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.
Neh 8:11 Ir levitai ramino žmones, sakydami: "Nusiraminkite, nes ši diena šventa. Neliūdėkite! "
Ne 8:11 So the Levites stilled all the people, saying, Hold your peace, for the day is holy; neither be ye grieved.
Ps 142:5 Šaukiuosi tavęs, Viešpatie, sakau: "Tu mano užuovėja, visa, ką turiu gyvųjų šalyje. "
Ps 142:5 I cried unto thee, O LORD: I said, Thou art my refuge and my portion in the land of the living.
Ps 106:48 Tebūna pašlovintas Viešpats, Izraelio Dievas, nuo amžių per amžius! Tesako visa tauta: "Amen! "Šlovinkite Viešpatį!
Ps 106:48 Blessed be the LORD God of Israel from everlasting to everlasting: and let all the people say, Amen. Praise ye the LORD.
Ez 1:5 Jos viduryje rodėsi esą keturi gyvūnai. Jie buvo panašūs į žmones,
Eze 1:5 Also out of the midst thereof came the likeness of four living creatures. And this was their appearance; they had the likeness of a man.
Nah 1:5 Prieš jį dreba kalnai, nyksta kalvos; nuo jo veido krūpčioja žemė, pasaulis ir visa, kas jame gyvena.
Na 1:5 The mountains quake at him, and the hills melt, and the earth is burned at his presence, yea, the world, and all that dwell therein.
Mt 4:7 Jėzus jam atsako: "Taip pat parašyta: Negundyk Viešpaties, savo Dievo. "
Mat 4:7 Jesus said unto him, It is written again, Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God.
1Pt 3:10 Kas trokšta mylėti gyvenimąir matyti gerų dienų, tepažaboja liežuvį nuo piktoir lūpas nuo klastingų kalbų.
1P 3:10 For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile:
Įst 24:9 Atsimink, ką Viešpats, tavo Dievas, padarė Mirjamai kelionėje, kai išėjote iš Egipto.
De 24:9 Remember what the LORD thy God did unto Miriam by the way, after that ye were come forth out of Egypt.
Jud 1:24 Tam, kuris gali išlaikyti jus nenupuolusius ir savo šlovės akivaizdon pastatyti nesuteptus ir džiaugsmingus,
Jude 1:24 Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy,
Mk 16:19 Baigęs jiems kalbėti, Viešpats Jėzus buvo paimtas į dangų ir atsisėdo Dievo dešinėje.
Mar 16:19 So then after the Lord had spoken unto them, he was received up into heaven, and sat on the right hand of God.
Pat 27:1 Nesididžiuok rytdiena, nes nežinai, ką rytojus gali atnešti.
Pr 27:1 Boast not thyself of to morrow; for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth.
Ps 56:5 Visą laiką jie stengiasi pakenkti mano užmojams; visos jų mintys ­ man ką pikta padaryti.
Ps 56:5 Every day they wrest my words: all their thoughts are against me for evil.
Iš 37:6 Padarė malonės sostą iš gryno aukso pustrečios uolekties ilgio ir pusantros uolekties pločio.
Ex 37:6 And he made the mercy seat of pure gold: two cubits and a half was the length thereof, and one cubit and a half the breadth thereof.
Ps 123:3 Pasigailėk mūsų, Viešpatie, pasigailėk mūsų, nes esame persisotinę didelio pažeminimo.
Ps 123:3 Have mercy upon us, O LORD, have mercy upon us: for we are exceedingly filled with contempt.
Jn 12:32 O aš, kai būsiu pakeltas nuo žemės, visus trauksiu prie savęs. "
Jo 12:32 And I, if I be lifted up from the earth, will draw all men unto me.
Jer 23:6 Jo dienomis Judas bus išgelbėtas, ir Izraelis saugiai gyvens. Jis bus vadinamas šitokiu vardu: ‘Viešpats ­ mūsų teisumas. ’
Jer 23:6 In his days Judah shall be saved, and Israel shall dwell safely: and this is his name whereby he shall be called, THE LORD OUR RIGHTEOUSNESS.
Ez 47:2 Jis išvedė mane pro šiaurinius vartus ir vedė aplink lauko puse prie išorinių vartų, pro kuriuos einama į rytus. Žiūriu, vanduo liejasi pietiniame pakraštyje.
Eze 47:2 Then brought he me out of the way of the gate northward, and led me about the way without unto the utter gate by the way that looketh eastward; and, behold, there ran out waters on the right side.
1Tim 1:4 neužsiiminėtų pasakomis ir begaliniais kilmės sąrašais, kurie veikiau kelia ginčus negu yra pravartūs išganingiems Dievo sumanymams, įgyvendinamiems tikėjimu.
1Ti 1:4 Neither give heed to fables and endless genealogies, which minister questions, rather than godly edifying which is in faith: so do.

Sanctus Corpus Deus