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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Job 4:11 Stiprus liūtas nugaišta, nes trūksta grobio, o jo jaunikliai išsiblaško.
Job 4:11 The old lion perisheth for lack of prey, and the stout lion's whelps are scattered abroad.
Ps 91:16 Pasotinsiu jį ilgu amžiumi, pagirdysiu savo išganymu. "
Ps 91:16 With long life will I satisfy him, and shew him my salvation.
Įst 1:8 Žiūrėkit! Tą kraštą atidaviau jums. Įženkite ir užimkite kraštą, kurį Viešpats prisiekė duoti jūsų protėviams ­ Abraomui, Izaokui ir Jokūbui, jiems ir jų palikuonims po jų. ’
De 1:8 Behold, I have set the land before you: go in and possess the land which the LORD sware unto your fathers, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, to give unto them and to their seed after them.
Įst 13:17 Teneprilimpa prie tavo rankų niekas, kas skirta sunaikinti, idant Viešpats, nusigręžęs nuo degančio įniršio, pasigailėtų tavęs ir pasigailėjęs padaugintų tave, kaip prisiekė tavo protėviams
De 13:17 And there shall cleave nought of the cursed thing to thine hand: that the LORD may turn from the fierceness of his anger, and shew thee mercy, and have compassion upon thee, and multiply thee, as he hath sworn unto thy fathers;
2Krn 32:20 Todėl karalius Ezekijas ir pranašas Amoco sūnus Izaijas meldėsi ir šaukėsi dangaus.
2Ch 32:20 And for this cause Hezekiah the king, and the prophet Isaiah the son of Amoz, prayed and cried to heaven.
2Sam 6:4 su Dievo Skrynia. Achjojas ėjo pirma Skrynios.
2Sa 6:4 And they brought it out of the house of Abinadab which was at Gibeah, accompanying the ark of God: and Ahio went before the ark.
2Krn 20:9 ‘Jei nelaimė mus ištiktų ­ ar baudžiantis kalavijas, ar maras, ar badas, ­ mes rinksimės prie šių Namų ir prie tavęs, nes tavo vardas šiuose Namuose, ir šauksimės tavęs savo nelaimėje, tu išklausysi ir išgelbėsi. ’
2Ch 20:9 If, when evil cometh upon us, as the sword, judgment, or pestilence, or famine, we stand before this house, and in thy presence, (for thy name is in this house,) and cry unto thee in our affliction, then thou wilt hear and help.
Lk 1:31 Štai tu pradėsi įsčiose ir pagimdysi sūnų, kurį pavadinsi Jėzumi.
Lu 1:31 And, behold, thou shalt conceive in thy womb, and bring forth a son, and shalt call his name JESUS.
Lk 8:9 Jo mokiniai paklausė, ką reiškiąs tasai palyginimas.
Lu 8:9 And his disciples asked him, saying, What might this parable be?
Gal 1:5 Jam šlovė per amžių amžius! Amen.
Ga 1:5 To whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen.
Jn 14:10 Nejau tu netiki, kad aš esu Tėve ir Tėvas yra manyje? ! Žodžius, kuriuos jums kalbu, ne iš savęs kalbu. Manyje esantis Tėvas daro savuosius darbus.
Jo 14:10 Believest thou not that I am in the Father, and the Father in me? the words that I speak unto you I speak not of myself: but the Father that dwelleth in me, he doeth the works.
1Kor 14:15 Ką daryti? Aš melsiuosi dvasia ir melsiuosi protu; giedosiu dvasia ir giedosiu protu.
1C 14:15 What is it then? I will pray with the spirit, and I will pray with the understanding also: I will sing with the spirit, and I will sing with the understanding also.
2Sam 24:9 Joabas pranešė karaliui surašytų į sąrašą žmonių skaičių: Izraelyje buvo aštuoni šimtai tūkstančių karių, pasiruošusių pakelti kalaviją, o Judo vyrų skaičius buvo penki šimtai tūkstančių.
2Sa 24:9 And Joab gave up the sum of the number of the people unto the king: and there were in Israel eight hundred thousand valiant men that drew the sword; and the men of Judah were five hundred thousand men.
Iš 29:9 apjuosi juostomis ir uždėsi jiems kepures. Kunigo tarnyba bus jų amžinas įsakas. Tada įvesdinsi į kunigų tarnybą Aaroną ir jo sūnus.
Ex 29:9 And thou shalt gird them with girdles, Aaron and his sons, and put the bonnets on them: and the priest's office shall be theirs for a perpetual statute: and thou shalt consecrate Aaron and his sons.
Koh 5:18 Štai ką suvokiau iš tikrųjų esant gera: žmogus turėtų valgyti ir gerti bei mėgautis visais savo triūso vaisiais po saule per tas suskaičiuotas gyvenimo dienas, kurias Dievas jam yra davęs. Juk tokia jo dalia!
Ec 5:18 Behold that which I have seen: it is good and comely for one to eat and to drink, and to enjoy the good of all his labour that he taketh under the sun all the days of his life, which God giveth him: for it is his portion.
Pr 18:8 Tuomet, paėmęs varškės bei pieno ir paruoštą veršieną, padėjo visa prieš juos, o pats patarnavo jiems valgant po medžiu.
Ge 18:8 And he took butter, and milk, and the calf which he had dressed, and set it before them; and he stood by them under the tree, and they did eat.
Sk 14:35 Aš, Viešpats, kalbu! Tikrai taip padarysiu visai šiai nedorai bendrijai, susimokiusiai prieš mane. Šioje dykumoje visi ligi vieno ras galą, čia jie išmirs. "
Nu 14:35 I the LORD have said, I will surely do it unto all this evil congregation, that are gathered together against me: in this wilderness they shall be consumed, and there they shall die.
Dan 4:25 Tu būsi išguitas iš žmonių tarpo, tavo buveinė bus tarp laukų žvėrių, tu turėsi ėsti žolę kaip jaučiai, būsi maudomas rasos iš dangaus, ir septyni laikotarpiai praslinks, kol pripažinsi, kad Aukščiausiasis valdo žmonių karalystę ir duoda ją, kam nori.
Da 4:25 That they shall drive thee from men, and thy dwelling shall be with the beasts of the field, and they shall make thee to eat grass as oxen, and they shall wet thee with the dew of heaven, and seven times shall pass over thee, till thou know that the most High ruleth in the kingdom of men, and giveth it to whomsoever he will.
Zch 11:10 Paėmiau lazdą ‘Malonę’ ir perlaužiau, panaikindamas Sandorą, kurią buvau sudaręs su visomis tautomis.
Zec 11:10 And I took my staff, even Beauty, and cut it asunder, that I might break my covenant which I had made with all the people.
1Krn 6:21 šio sūnus Joachas, šio sūnus Idojas, šio sūnus Zerachas, šio sūnus Jeotrajas.
1Ch 6:21 Joah his son, Iddo his son, Zerah his son, Jeaterai his son.

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