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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Mt 24:9 Paskui jus atiduos kankinti ir žudyti. Jūs būsite dėl manęs visų tautų nekenčiami.
Mat 24:9 Then shall they deliver you up to be afflicted, and shall kill you: and ye shall be hated of all nations for my name's sake.
Ps 108:3 Tautose dėkosiu tau, Viešpatie, giedosiu tau šlovės giesmę tarp tautų.
Ps 108:3 I will praise thee, O LORD, among the people: and I will sing praises unto thee among the nations.
Ps 139:18 Mėginu jas suskaičiuoti, bet jų daugiau negu smėlio grūdelių, ir net visas suskaičiavęs, vis tiek su tavimi tebebūčiau.
Ps 139:18 If I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am still with thee.
Mt 27:21 Tuomet valdytojas jiems tarė: "Katrą norite, kad jums paleisčiau? " Jie šaukė: "Barabą! "
Mat 27:21 The governor answered and said unto them, Whether of the twain will ye that I release unto you? They said, Barabbas.
Sk 18:15 Kas pirmas atveria įsčias tarp visų gyvūnų ­ ar žmonių, ar gyvulių, ­ kas atnašaujama Viešpačiui, bus tavo. Tačiau privalai leisti išpirkti žmonių pirmagimį; leisi išpirkti ir nešvaraus gyvulio pirmagimį.
Nu 18:15 Every thing that openeth the matrix in all flesh, which they bring unto the LORD, whether it be of men or beasts, shall be thine: nevertheless the firstborn of man shalt thou surely redeem, and the firstling of unclean beasts shalt thou redeem.
Iz 10:17 Izraelio Šviesa virs ugnimi, o jo Šventasis ­ liepsna. Per vieną dieną ji sudegins ir surysjo usnis ir erškėčius.
Isa 10:17 And the light of Israel shall be for a fire, and his Holy One for a flame: and it shall burn and devour his thorns and his briers in one day;
Ts 3:14 Moabo karalius Eglonas valdė izraelitus aštuoniolika metų.
Judg 3:14 So the children of Israel served Eglon the king of Moab eighteen years.
1Krn 16:27 jo priekyje ­ garbė ir didybė, jo buveinėje ­ jėga ir džiaugsmas.
1Ch 16:27 Glory and honour are in his presence; strength and gladness are in his place.
Apd 20:18 Jiems atėjus, Paulius prabilo: "Jūs žinote, kaip aš visą laiką, nuo pirmosios dienos, kurią įžengiau į Aziją, pas jus elgiausi,
Ac 20:18 And when they were come to him, he said unto them, Ye know, from the first day that I came into Asia, after what manner I have been with you at all seasons,
1Tim 3:2 O vyskupas turi būti nepeiktinas: tik kartą vedęs , blaivus, protingas, padorus, svetingas, gebąs mokyti,
1Ti 3:2 A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach;
Ps 31:23 Mylėkite Viešpatį, visi jo ištikimieji! Viešpats saugo ištikimuosius, bet skaudžiai atlygina tam, kuris išpuikusiai elgiasi.
Ps 31:23 O love the LORD, all ye his saints: for the LORD preserveth the faithful, and plentifully rewardeth the proud doer.
Lk 15:13 Netrukus jaunėlis, susiėmęs savo dalį, iškeliavo į tolimą šalį. Ten, palaidai gyvendamas, išeikvojo savo lobį.
Lu 15:13 And not many days after the younger son gathered all together, and took his journey into a far country, and there wasted his substance with riotous living.
Iš 16:14 Rasai nukritus, dykumos paviršiuje gulėjo kažkas smulkaus, panašaus į grūdelius, tokio smulkaus tarsi šerkšnas ant žemės.
Ex 16:14 And when the dew that lay was gone up, behold, upon the face of the wilderness there lay a small round thing, as small as the hoar frost on the ground.
Ez 41:24 Abejos durys turėjo dvi sąvaras: dvi sąvaras vienos durys ir dvi sąvaras kitos.
Eze 41:24 And the doors had two leaves apiece, two turning leaves; two leaves for the one door, and two leaves for the other door.
1Sam 1:1 Ramataim Cofime gyveno toks vyras, zufietis iš Efraimo aukštumų, vardu Elkana, efrato Cūfo sūnaus Tohuvo sūnaus Elihuvo sūnaus Jerohamo sūnus.
1Sa 1:1 Now there was a certain man of Ramathaimzophim, of mount Ephraim, and his name was Elkanah, the son of Jeroham, the son of Elihu, the son of Tohu, the son of Zuph, an Ephrathite:
Kun 15:10 Kas paliestų bet kokį daiktą, buvusį po juo, bus nešvarus ligi vakaro, o kas tokius daiktus neštų, turės išsiskalbti drabužius, išsimaudyti vandenyje ir bus nešvarus ligi vakaro.
Le 15:10 And whosoever toucheth any thing that was under him shall be unclean until the even: and he that beareth any of those things shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water, and be unclean until the even.
Ez 30:16 Padegsiu Egiptą, Sinas raitysis skausmuose, Nojo sienos bus pralaužtos, o Nofas kovos su priešais dieną.
Eze 30:16 And I will set fire in Egypt: Sin shall have great pain, and No shall be rent asunder, and Noph shall have distresses daily.
Mt 25:34 Ir tars karalius stovintiems dešinėje: ‘Ateikite, mano Tėvo palaimintieji, paveldėkite nuo pasaulio sukūrimo jums paruoštą karalystę!
Mat 25:34 Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:
Job 12:11 Ar ne ausis svarsto žodžius, kaip gomurys ragauja maistą?
Job 12:11 Doth not the ear try words? and the mouth taste his meat?
Jer 36:15 "Prašom sėstis, ­ jie tarė jam, ­ ir perskaityti. " Ir Baruchas jiems perskaitė.
Jer 36:15 And they said unto him, Sit down now, and read it in our ears. So Baruch read it in their ears.

Sanctus Corpus Deus