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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Jer 45:1 Pranašo Jeremijo žodis Nerijos sūnui Baruchui, kai jis užrašinėjo į knygą pranašavimus iš Jeremijo lūpų ketvirtais Judo karaliaus Jošijo sūnaus Jehojakimo metais:
Jer 45:1 The word that Jeremiah the prophet spake unto Baruch the son of Neriah, when he had written these words in a book at the mouth of Jeremiah, in the fourth year of Jehoiakim the son of Josiah king of Judah, saying,
2Sam 4:1 Išgirdęs, kad Abneras mirė Hebrone, Sauliaus sūnus Išbošetas nuleido rankas. Visas Izraelis susirūpino.
2Sa 4:1 And when Saul's son heard that Abner was dead in Hebron, his hands were feeble, and all the Israelites were troubled.
Kun 26:44 Tačiau, nepaisant viso to, net kai jie bus priešų šalyje, jų neatmesiu ir nepaniekinsiu, kad juos visiškai sunaikinčiau, sulaužydamas su jais sudarytą Sandorą, nes aš esu Viešpats, jų Dievas.
Le 26:44 And yet for all that, when they be in the land of their enemies, I will not cast them away, neither will I abhor them, to destroy them utterly, and to break my covenant with them: for I am the LORD their God.
Dan 12:2 Daugelis miegančiųjų žemės dulkėse atsibus: kai kurie ­ amžinajam gyvenimui, kiti ­ gėdai ir amžinajai negarbei.
Da 12:2 And many of them that sleep in the dust of the earth shall awake, some to everlasting life, and some to shame and everlasting contempt.
Mt 27:47 Kai kurie iš ten stovėjusių išgirdę sakė, jog jis šaukiąsis Elijo.
Mat 27:47 Some of them that stood there, when they heard that, said, This man calleth for Elias.
Ps 67:1 Choro vadovui. Su styginiais instrumentais. Psalmė. Giesmė. Tebūna Dievas mums maloningas ir telaimina mus! Tešviečia mums jo veidas, Sela
Ps 67:1 God be merciful unto us, and bless us; and cause his face to shine upon us; Selah.
Įst 4:7 Kokia kita didelė tauta turi taip arti savęs esantį dievą, kaip yra Viešpats, mūsų Dievas, kai tik mes jo šaukiamės?
De 4:7 For what nation is there so great, who hath God so nigh unto them, as the LORD our God is in all things that we call upon him for?
Iš 30:31 Izraelitams kalbėsi, sakydamas: ‘Tai bus mano šventas patepimo aliejus per visas jūsų kartas.
Ex 30:31 And thou shalt speak unto the children of Israel, saying, This shall be an holy anointing oil unto me throughout your generations.
Apr 16:5 Ir išgirdau vandenų angelą sakant: "Teisus tu, kuris esi ir buvai, Šventasis, kad taip nusprendei.
Re 16:5 And I heard the angel of the waters say, Thou art righteous, O Lord, which art, and wast, and shalt be, because thou hast judged thus.
Joz 21:17 o iš Benjamino giminės ­ Gibeoną su ganyklomis, Gebą su ganyklomis,
Jos 21:17 And out of the tribe of Benjamin, Gibeon with her suburbs, Geba with her suburbs,
Mk 12:14 Šitie atėję sako jam: "Mokytojau, žinome, jog esi tiesakalbis ir niekam nepataikauji. Tu nepaisai žmonių padėties, bet mokai Dievo kelio, kaip reikalauja teisybė. Valia mokėti ciesoriui mokesčius ar ne? Mokėti ar nemokėti? "
Mar 12:14 And when they were come, they say unto him, Master, we know that thou art true, and carest for no man: for thou regardest not the person of men, but teachest the way of God in truth: Is it lawful to give tribute to Caesar, or not?
Jn 7:22 Mozė jums įsakė apipjaustymą ­ nors jis kilęs ne iš Mozės, bet iš protėvių, ­ ir jūs apipjaustote šabo dieną.
Jo 7:22 Moses therefore gave unto you circumcision; (not because it is of Moses, but of the fathers;) and ye on the sabbath day circumcise a man.
1Kar 2:21 Ji tarė: "Tebūna duota šunemietė Abišaga kaip žmona tavo broliui Adonijui. "
1Ki 2:21 And she said, Let Abishag the Shunammite be given to Adonijah thy brother to wife.
2Kar 9:24 Jehuvas įtempė lanką ir pataikė Jehoramui į tarpumentį, strėlė pervėrė jam širdį, ir jis sukniubo vežime.
2Ki 9:24 And Jehu drew a bow with his full strength, and smote Jehoram between his arms, and the arrow went out at his heart, and he sunk down in his chariot.
Mt 3:1 Anomis dienomis pasirodė Jonas Krikštytojas. Jis skelbė Judėjos dykumoje:
Mat 3:1 In those days came John the Baptist, preaching in the wilderness of Judaea,
Neh 11:33 Hacore, Ramoje, Gitaimuose,
Ne 11:33 Hazor, Ramah, Gittaim,
Lk 8:22 Vieną dieną Jėzus su mokiniais įlipo į valtį ir pasakė: "Irkimės anapus ežero! " Jie atsistūmė nuo kranto.
Lu 8:22 Now it came to pass on a certain day, that he went into a ship with his disciples: and he said unto them, Let us go over unto the other side of the lake. And they launched forth.
Apd 10:14 Petras atsakė: "Jokiu būdu, Viešpatie! Aš niekuomet nesu valgęs sutepto ar netyro maisto. "
Ac 10:14 But Peter said, Not so, Lord; for I have never eaten any thing that is common or unclean.
Pat 20:24 Viešpats veda žmogaus žingsnius; tad kaip žmogus gali suvokti savo kelią?
Pr 20:24 Man's goings are of the LORD; how can a man then understand his own way?
1Sam 24:10 Savo akimis gali dabar matyti, kad Viešpats šiandien oloje buvo įdavęs tave man į rankas. Nors jie ir ragino tave užmušti, aš tavęs pasigailėjau. Tariau sau: ‘Rankos prieš savo valdovą nepakelsiu, nes jis Viešpaties pateptasis. ’
1Sa 24:10 Behold, this day thine eyes have seen how that the LORD had delivered thee to day into mine hand in the cave: and some bade me kill thee: but mine eye spared thee; and I said, I will not put forth mine hand against my lord; for he is the LORD's anointed.

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