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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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2Sam 10:7 Tai išgirdęs, Dovydas pasiuntė Joabą ir visą kariuomenę su galiūnais.
2Sa 10:7 And when David heard of it, he sent Joab, and all the host of the mighty men.
Lk 19:10 Žmogaus Sūnus atėjo ieškoti ir gelbėti, kas buvo pražuvę. "
Lu 19:10 For the Son of man is come to seek and to save that which was lost.
Mt 11:18 Buvo atėjęs Jonas, nevalgus ir negeriantis, tai jie kalbėjo: ‘Jis demono apsėstas. ’
Mat 11:18 For John came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, He hath a devil.
1Jn 4:9 O Dievo meilė pasireiškė mums tuo, jog Dievas atsiuntė į pasaulį savo viengimį Sūnų, kad mes gyventume per jį.
1J 4:9 In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him.
Mk 2:27 Ir pridūrė: "Šabas padarytas žmogui, ne žmogus šabui;
Mar 2:27 And he said unto them, The sabbath was made for man, and not man for the sabbath:
Job 23:5 Noriu žinoti, kokiais žodžiais jis man atsakytų, ir pasvarstyti, ką jis man sakytų.
Job 23:5 I would know the words which he would answer me, and understand what he would say unto me.
Mch 1:11 Eikite sau, Šafyro gyventojai, nuogi ir susigėdę. Neišeina Caanano gyventojai; Bet Ecelis vaitojair atims jums savo paramą.
Mic 1:11 Pass ye away, thou inhabitant of Saphir, having thy shame naked: the inhabitant of Zaanan came not forth in the mourning of Bethezel; he shall receive of you his standing.
Iš 36:3 Jie perėmė iš Mozės visas savanoriškas aukas, izraelitų atneštas šventyklos statybai. Bet žmonės ir toliau kas rytą nešė Mozei savanoriškas aukas.
Ex 36:3 And they received of Moses all the offering, which the children of Israel had brought for the work of the service of the sanctuary, to make it withal. And they brought yet unto him free offerings every morning.
Lk 9:44 "Įsidėmėkite gerai mano žodžius: Žmogaus Sūnus turi būti atiduotas į žmonių rankas. "Jėzus vėl apie savo mirtįVisiems stebintis Jėzaus darbais, jis prabilo į mokinius:
Lu 9:44 Let these sayings sink down into your ears: for the Son of man shall be delivered into the hands of men.
Apd 27:30 Jūreiviai mėgino pabėgti iš laivo. Jie nuleido į jūrą gelbėjimo valtį, neva norėdami išmesti inkarus laivo priešakyje.
Ac 27:30 And as the shipmen were about to flee out of the ship, when they had let down the boat into the sea, under colour as though they would have cast anchors out of the foreship,
Job 37:14 Klausykis, Jobai, stabtelk akimirksnįir pamąstyk apie nuostabius Dievo darbus.
Job 37:14 Hearken unto this, O Job: stand still, and consider the wondrous works of God.
1Krn 9:42 Ahazui gimė Jara, Jarai ­ Alemetas, Azmavetas ir Zimris. Zimriui gimė Moca.
1Ch 9:42 And Ahaz begat Jarah; and Jarah begat Alemeth, and Azmaveth, and Zimri; and Zimri begat Moza;
Joz 3:5 Jozuė sakė žmonėms: "Pašventinkite save, nes rytoj Viešpats darys tarp jūsų nuostabius darbus. "
Jos 3:5 And Joshua said unto the people, Sanctify yourselves: for to morrow the LORD will do wonders among you.
Ts 8:15 Tada jis atėjo pas Sukotų gyventojus ir tarė: "Štai Zebachas ir Calmuna, dėl kurių jūs iš manęs tyčiojotės, sakydami: ‘Ar Zebachas ir Calmuna jau tavo rankose, kad mes turėtume duoti duonos tavo bejėgiams kareiviams? ’"
Judg 8:15 And he came unto the men of Succoth, and said, Behold Zebah and Zalmunna, with whom ye did upbraid me, saying, Are the hands of Zebah and Zalmunna now in thine hand, that we should give bread unto thy men that are weary?
Įst 32:11 Kaip erelis drąsina savo jauniklius, plazdendamas virš lizdo, taip jis išskleidė savo sparnus ir, paėmęs jį, nešė pirmyn ant savo sparnų.
De 32:11 As an eagle stirreth up her nest, fluttereth over her young, spreadeth abroad her wings, taketh them, beareth them on her wings:
Apd 19:10 Tai truko dvejus metus, ir visi Azijos gyventojai, tiek žydai, tiek graikai, išgirdo Viešpaties žodį.
Ac 19:10 And this continued by the space of two years; so that all they which dwelt in Asia heard the word of the Lord Jesus, both Jews and Greeks.
Pr 26:15 Užpildami žemėmis, filistinai buvo užvertę visus šulinius, kuriuos iškasė jo tėvo tarnai Abraomo dienomis.
Ge 26:15 For all the wells which his father's servants had digged in the days of Abraham his father, the Philistines had stopped them, and filled them with earth.
Mk 1:21 Jie atvyko į Kafarnaumą, ir netrukus, šabo dieną, nuėjęs į sinagogą Jėzus pradėjo mokyti.
Mar 1:21 And they went into Capernaum; and straightway on the sabbath day he entered into the synagogue, and taught.
Joz 10:10 Viešpats apstulbino juos išgąsčiu Izraelio akivaizdoje. Izraelitai sutriuškino juos prie Gibeono ir vijosi Bet Horono šlaito keliu, niokodami iki pat Azekos ir Makedos.
Jos 10:10 And the LORD discomfited them before Israel, and slew them with a great slaughter at Gibeon, and chased them along the way that goeth up to Bethhoron, and smote them to Azekah, and unto Makkedah.
Job 34:13 Argi kas nors kitas patikėjo jam žemęir pavedė jam visą pasaulį?
Job 34:13 Who hath given him a charge over the earth? or who hath disposed the whole world?

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