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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Apd 6:6 Juos pristatė apaštalams, o šie melsdamiesi uždėjo ant jų rankas.
Ac 6:6 Whom they set before the apostles: and when they had prayed, they laid their hands on them.
Job 15:18 Išminčiai mane išmokė, o jie buvo ištikimi savo protėviams,
Job 15:18 Which wise men have told from their fathers, and have not hid it:
Iz 14:4 tu užtrauksi patyčių giesmę Babilono karaliui: Tai priėjo liepto galą engėjas! Tai nutilo jo įnirtis!
Isa 14:4 That thou shalt take up this proverb against the king of Babylon, and say, How hath the oppressor ceased! the golden city ceased!
Iš 32:9 Viešpats kalbėjo Mozei: "Matau, kad ši tauta yra kietasprandė.
Ex 32:9 And the LORD said unto Moses, I have seen this people, and, behold, it is a stiffnecked people:
Mk 1:29 Išėjęs iš sinagogos, Jėzus su Jokūbu ir Jonu iškart nuėjo į Simono ir Andriejaus namus.
Mar 1:29 And forthwith, when they were come out of the synagogue, they entered into the house of Simon and Andrew, with James and John.
Įst 28:44 Jis tau skolins, o tu jam neskolinsi; jis bus galva, o tu ­ uodega.
De 28:44 He shall lend to thee, and thou shalt not lend to him: he shall be the head, and thou shalt be the tail.
2Krn 24:10 Visi pareigūnai ir visi žmonės mielai nešė ir metė į dėžę, kol ją pripildydavo.
2Ch 24:10 And all the princes and all the people rejoiced, and brought in, and cast into the chest, until they had made an end.
Pr 34:25 Trečią dieną, kai jie dar kentėjo skausmus, du Jokūbo sūnūs ­ Simeonas ir Levis, Dinos broliai, pasiėmę kalavijus, nelauktai užpuolė miestą ir išžudė visus vyriškius.
Ge 34:25 And it came to pass on the third day, when they were sore, that two of the sons of Jacob, Simeon and Levi, Dinah's brethren, took each man his sword, and came upon the city boldly, and slew all the males.
2Krn 34:1 Jošijas buvo aštuonerių metų, kai tapo karaliumi, ir karaliavo Jeruzalėje trisdešimt vienerius metus.
2Ch 34:1 Josiah was eight years old when he began to reign, and he reigned in Jerusalem one and thirty years.
Įst 34:8 Izraelitai raudojo Mozės Moabo lygumose trisdešimt dienų. Mozės gedulo metas pasibaigė.
De 34:8 And the children of Israel wept for Moses in the plains of Moab thirty days: so the days of weeping and mourning for Moses were ended.
Mt 13:20 Pasėlys ant uolų ­ tai tasai, kuris, girdėdamas žodį, tuojau su džiaugsmu jį priima.
Mat 13:20 But he that received the seed into stony places, the same is he that heareth the word, and anon with joy receiveth it;
Ez 24:8 Norėdamas tikrai įnirštiir atkeršyti, pralietą kraują palikau ant plikos uolos, kad nebūtų pridengtas. "
Eze 24:8 That it might cause fury to come up to take vengeance; I have set her blood upon the top of a rock, that it should not be covered.
Job 36:13 Nedorieji tik tūžta širdyje, kai jis ištinka juos, ir pagalbos nesišaukia.
Job 36:13 But the hypocrites in heart heap up wrath: they cry not when he bindeth them.
Ps 5:8 Vesk mane, Viešpatie, savo išganingu teisumu, nepaisydamas budrių mano priešų! Ištiesink man kelią!
Ps 5:8 Lead me, O LORD, in thy righteousness because of mine enemies; make thy way straight before my face.
Iš 20:7 Nenaudosi piktam Viešpaties, savo Dievo, vardo, nes Viešpats nepaliks nenubausto to, kuris naudoja piktam jo vardą.
Ex 20:7 Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain; for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain.
Ez 45:13 Štai aukos, kurias atnašausite: nuo kiekvieno homero kviečių ­ šeštadalį efos, nuo kiekvieno homero miežių ­ šeštadalį efos.
Eze 45:13 This is the oblation that ye shall offer; the sixth part of an ephah of an homer of wheat, and ye shall give the sixth part of an ephah of an homer of barley:
Oz 8:1 Dėk ragą prie lūpų! Tarsi vanagas virš Viešpaties Namų įsikūrė nelaimė, nes jie sulaužė mano Sandorąir buvo neištikimi mano mokymui.
Ho 8:1 Set the trumpet to thy mouth. He shall come as an eagle against the house of the LORD, because they have transgressed my covenant, and trespassed against my law.
Pr 5:2 kaip vyrą ir moterį sukūrė. Kai jie buvo sukurti, jis juos palaimino ir davė jiems vardą žmonės.
Ge 5:2 Male and female created he them; and blessed them, and called their name Adam, in the day when they were created.
Lk 22:27 Katras yra vyresnis ­ kuris sėdi už stalo ar kuris jam patarnauja? Argi ne tas, kuris sėdi? ! O aš tarp jūsų esu kaip tas, kuris patarnauja.
Lu 22:27 For whether is greater, he that sitteth at meat, or he that serveth? is not he that sitteth at meat? but I am among you as he that serveth.
Rom 12:9 Meilė tebūna be veidmainystės. Bodėkitės pikto, laikykitės gero.
Ro 12:9 Let love be without dissimulation. Abhor that which is evil; cleave to that which is good.

Sanctus Corpus Deus