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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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2Krn 4:9 Jis pastatė kunigų kiemą, didįjį kiemą ir padarė duris didžiajam kiemui; duris aptraukė variu.
2Ch 4:9 Furthermore he made the court of the priests, and the great court, and doors for the court, and overlaid the doors of them with brass.
Gg 7:8 Tariau: "Įlipsiu į palmę, įsitversiu į jos šakas. "Tebūna tavo krūtys kaip vynuogių kekės, tavo alsavimas tarsi obuolių dvelkimas,
SS 7:8 I said, I will go up to the palm tree, I will take hold of the boughs thereof: now also thy breasts shall be as clusters of the vine, and the smell of thy nose like apples;
2Kor 10:10 Juk "laiškai, ­ sakoma, ­ yra svarūs ir griežti, bet jo kūno išvaizda menka ir iškalba prasta".
2C 10:10 For his letters, say they, are weighty and powerful; but his bodily presence is weak, and his speech contemptible.
Kun 5:19 Tokia yra kaltės atnaša; tas žmogus tikrai buvo kaltas Viešpačiui. "
Le 5:19 It is a trespass offering: he hath certainly trespassed against the LORD.
Pat 6:15 Žūtis tokį žmogų ištiks staiga, akimirksniu, be vilties atsitiesti.
Pr 6:15 Therefore shall his calamity come suddenly; suddenly shall he be broken without remedy.
Mt 4:7 Jėzus jam atsako: "Taip pat parašyta: Negundyk Viešpaties, savo Dievo. "
Mat 4:7 Jesus said unto him, It is written again, Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God.
2Krn 19:4 Juozapatas gyveno Jeruzalėje, bet nuolat vykdavo pabūti su žmonėmis nuo Beer Šebos iki Efraimo aukštumų ir sugrąžino juos pas Viešpatį, savo protėvių Dievą.
2Ch 19:4 And Jehoshaphat dwelt at Jerusalem: and he went out again through the people from Beersheba to mount Ephraim, and brought them back unto the LORD God of their fathers.
Ezd 9:5 Vakarinės aukos metu atsitokėjęs vis dar perplėštais drabužiais ir skraiste puoliau ant kelių, ištiesiau rankas į Viešpatį, savo Dievą,
Ezr 9:5 And at the evening sacrifice I arose up from my heaviness; and having rent my garment and my mantle, I fell upon my knees, and spread out my hands unto the LORD my God,
Lk 24:40 Tai taręs, jis parodė jiems rankas ir kojas.
Lu 24:40 And when he had thus spoken, he shewed them his hands and his feet.
Est 2:7 Mordechajas užaugino Hadasą, tai yra Esterą, savo dėdės dukterį, nes ji buvo netekusi ir tėvo, ir motinos. Mergelė buvo gražiai nuaugusi ir dailios išvaizdos. Mirus jos tėvui ir motinai, Mordechajas priglaudė ją kaip savo dukterį.
Es 2:7 And he brought up Hadassah, that is, Esther, his uncle's daughter: for she had neither father nor mother, and the maid was fair and beautiful; whom Mordecai, when her father and mother were dead, took for his own daughter.
Ps 65:11 Apvainikuoji metus savo gerumo derliumi; tavo vežimų provėžos trykšta aliejumi;
Ps 65:11 Thou crownest the year with thy goodness; and thy paths drop fatness.
1Sam 11:14 Samuelis tarė žmonėms: "Eikite šen! Eime į Gilgalą ir ten įsteikime karaliaus valdžią. "
1Sa 11:14 Then said Samuel to the people, Come, and let us go to Gilgal, and renew the kingdom there.
Pat 17:2 Sumanus tarnas valdys nemokšą sūnųir dalysis paveldu kaip vienas jo brolių.
Pr 17:2 A wise servant shall have rule over a son that causeth shame, and shall have part of the inheritance among the brethren.
Iš 9:13 Tada Viešpats tarė Mozei: "Atsikelk anksti rytą ir pasirodyk faraonui. Pasakyk jam: ‘Taip kalbėjo Viešpats, hebrajų Dievas: ‘Leisk mano tautai eiti manęs pagarbinti!
Ex 9:13 And the LORD said unto Moses, Rise up early in the morning, and stand before Pharaoh, and say unto him, Thus saith the LORD God of the Hebrews, Let my people go, that they may serve me.
1Kar 11:8 Tą pat jis padarė visoms savo svetimtautėms žmonoms, atnašaujančioms smilkalus ir aukas savo dievams.
1Ki 11:8 And likewise did he for all his strange wives, which burnt incense and sacrificed unto their gods.
Zch 5:6 ‘Kas gi tai? ’ ­ paklausiau. Jis tarė: ‘Tai krepšys, kuris išeina. ’ Ir paaiškino: ‘Tai jų kaltė visame krašte. ’
Zec 5:6 And I said, What is it? And he said, This is an ephah that goeth forth. He said moreover, This is their resemblance through all the earth.
Sk 20:22 Pakilę iš Kadešo, izraelitai atkeliavo prie Horo kalno.
Nu 20:22 And the children of Israel, even the whole congregation, journeyed from Kadesh, and came unto mount Hor.
1Krn 17:11 ’Kai pasibaigs tavo dienos ir nueisi savo protėvių keliu, aš pakelsiu vietoj tavęs įpėdinį, vieną tavo sūnų, ir padarysiu tvirtą jo karalystę.
1Ch 17:11 And it shall come to pass, when thy days be expired that thou must go to be with thy fathers, that I will raise up thy seed after thee, which shall be of thy sons; and I will establish his kingdom.
Neh 7:42 Harimo palikuonių tūkstantis septyniolika.
Ne 7:42 The children of Harim, a thousand and seventeen.
Mt 24:34 Iš tiesų sakau jums: nepraeis ši karta, iki visa tai įvyks.
Mat 24:34 Verily I say unto you, This generation shall not pass, till all these things be fulfilled.

Sanctus Corpus Deus