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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Jer 21:14 Aš nubausiu jus pagal jūsų darbus! ­tai Viešpaties žodis. ­Jo miške užkursiu ugnį, kuri surys viską, kas tik yra aplinkui. "
Jer 21:14 But I will punish you according to the fruit of your doings, saith the LORD: and I will kindle a fire in the forest thereof, and it shall devour all things round about it.
Joz 21:29 Jarmutas su ganyklomis ir En Ganimai su ganyklomis, keturi miestai;
Jos 21:29 Jarmuth with her suburbs, Engannim with her suburbs; four cities.
Įst 28:55 bet kokio gabalo savo vaikų mėsos, kurią pats valgys, kai nebus likę nieko kito, beviltiškai skurstant visiems tavo miestams dėl priešo apgulos.
De 28:55 So that he will not give to any of them of the flesh of his children whom he shall eat: because he hath nothing left him in the siege, and in the straitness, wherewith thine enemies shall distress thee in all thy gates.
Dan 6:25 Tuomet karalius Darijus parašė visų kalbų tautoms ir gentims, gyvenančioms visoje žemėje: "Teklesti jūsų gerovė!
Da 6:25 Then king Darius wrote unto all people, nations, and languages, that dwell in all the earth; Peace be multiplied unto you.
Job 3:7 Taip! Ta naktis tebūna bevaisė, tenebūna girdėti joje jokio džiugaus balso.
Job 3:7 Lo, let that night be solitary, let no joyful voice come therein.
Įst 34:9 Nūno sūnus Jozuė buvo kupinas išminties dvasios, nes Mozė buvo uždėjęs ant jo savo rankas, o izraelitai jo klausė, kaip Mozė buvo įsakęs.
De 34:9 And Joshua the son of Nun was full of the spirit of wisdom; for Moses had laid his hands upon him: and the children of Israel hearkened unto him, and did as the LORD commanded Moses.
Pr 49:20 Ašero maistas bus gausus, jis tieks karališkų skanėstų.
Ge 49:20 Out of Asher his bread shall be fat, and he shall yield royal dainties.
2Kar 24:10 Tuo metu Babilono karaliaus Nebukadnecaro pajėgos užpuolė Jeruzalę, ir miestas buvo apgultas.
2Ki 24:10 At that time the servants of Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon came up against Jerusalem, and the city was besieged.
2Krn 27:2 Jis darė, kas dora Viešpaties akyse, kaip jo tėvas buvo daręs, tik į Viešpaties Šventyklą nėjo. Bet žmonės elgėsi vis dar nedorai.
2Ch 27:2 And he did that which was right in the sight of the LORD, according to all that his father Uzziah did: howbeit he entered not into the temple of the LORD. And the people did yet corruptly.
Mt 17:1 Po šešių dienų Jėzus pasiėmė su savimi Petrą, Jokūbą ir jo brolį Joną ir užsivedė juos nuošaliai ant aukšto kalno.
Mat 17:1 And after six days Jesus taketh Peter, James, and John his brother, and bringeth them up into an high mountain apart,
2Krn 32:4 Sutelkę labai daug žmonių, jie uždarė visus šaltinius ir upelį, tekantį artimame slėnyje, sakydami: "Kam gi turėtų ateiti Asirijos karaliai ir rasti apsčiai vandens! "
2Ch 32:4 So there was gathered much people together, who stopped all the fountains, and the brook that ran through the midst of the land, saying, Why should the kings of Assyria come, and find much water?
1Kor 15:58 Tad, mano mylimieji broliai, būkite tvirti ir nepajudinami, vis uoliau dirbkite Viešpaties darbą ir žinokite, kad jūsų triūsas ne veltui Viešpatyje.
1C 15:58 Therefore, my beloved brethren, be ye stedfast, unmoveable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, forasmuch as ye know that your labour is not in vain in the Lord.
2Kar 6:14 Ten jis išsiuntė raitelius bei kovos vežimus ir dideles pajėgas. Nužygiavę nakčia, jie apsupo miestą.
2Ki 6:14 Therefore sent he thither horses, and chariots, and a great host: and they came by night, and compassed the city about.
Kun 14:19 kunigas paaukos auką už nuodėmę ir atliks permaldavimą labui to žmogaus, kuris turi būti apvalytas. Po to bus papjauta deginamoji auka;
Le 14:19 And the priest shall offer the sin offering, and make an atonement for him that is to be cleansed from his uncleanness; and afterward he shall kill the burnt offering:
Mk 5:34 O jis tarė jai: "Dukterie, tavo tikėjimas išgelbėjo tave, eik rami ir būk išgijusi iš savo ligos. "
Mar 5:34 And he said unto her, Daughter, thy faith hath made thee whole; go in peace, and be whole of thy plague.
Ps 115:18 Mes, gyvieji, garbinsime tavedabar ir per amžius. Šlovinkite Viešpatį!
Ps 115:18 But we will bless the LORD from this time forth and for evermore. Praise the LORD.
2Kor 13:10 ‘Todėl, būdamas toli, rašau tai, kad atvykęs neturėčiau griežtai elgtis, griebdamasis galios, kurią man Viešpats suteikė tam, kad ugdyčiau, o ne kad griaučiau.
2C 13:10 Therefore I write these things being absent, lest being present I should use sharpness, according to the power which the Lord hath given me to edification, and not to destruction.
Mt 13:52 Tuomet jis tarė: "Todėl kiekvienas Rašto aiškintojas, tapęs dangaus karalystės mokiniu, panašus į šeimininką, kuris iškelia iš savo lobyno naujų ir senų daiktų. "
Mat 13:52 Then said he unto them, Therefore every scribe which is instructed unto the kingdom of heaven is like unto a man that is an householder, which bringeth forth out of his treasure things new and old.
Iš 4:8 "Jei jie tavimi netikės ar nepaisys pirmojo ženklo, tai patikės antruoju ženklu.
Ex 4:8 And it shall come to pass, if they will not believe thee, neither hearken to the voice of the first sign, that they will believe the voice of the latter sign.
2Krn 20:30 Juozapato karalystėje buvo ramu, nes jo Dievas davė jam taiką iš visų pusių.
2Ch 20:30 So the realm of Jehoshaphat was quiet: for his God gave him rest round about.

Sanctus Corpus Deus