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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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2Kor 8:13 Niekas nereikalauja, kad kitiems tektų lengvatos, o jums naštos, bet kad būtų lygybė.
2C 8:13 For I mean not that other men be eased, and ye burdened:
1Kor 1:7 Todėl jums, laukiantiems mūsų Viešpaties Jėzaus Kristaus apsireiškimo, nestinga jokios malonės dovanos.
1C 1:7 So that ye come behind in no gift; waiting for the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ:
Iš 28:26 Padirbsi iš aukso kitus du žiedus ir pritvirtinsi juos apačioje prie dviejų krūtinės dėklo kampų ant užpakalinės pusės prie pat efodo.
Ex 28:26 And thou shalt make two rings of gold, and thou shalt put them upon the two ends of the breastplate in the border thereof, which is in the side of the ephod inward.
Žyd 3:15 Juk pasakyta: Jei šiandien išgirsite jo balsą, neužkietinkite savo širdžių kaip per maištą.
He 3:15 While it is said, To day if ye will hear his voice, harden not your hearts, as in the provocation.
Ez 22:12 Pas tave imami kyšiai, kad būtų pralietas kraujas. Tu imi ir išankstinį, ir priaugusį nuošimtį, daraisi sau naudos, skriausdamas artimą, ir pamiršai mane, ­ tai Viešpaties DIEVO žodis.
Eze 22:12 In thee have they taken gifts to shed blood; thou hast taken usury and increase, and thou hast greedily gained of thy neighbours by extortion, and hast forgotten me, saith the Lord GOD.
Ts 18:22 Nuėjus tolokai nuo Michėjo namų, buvo sušaukti vyrai iš Michėjo kaimynystėje esančių namų. Pasiviję Dano žmones,
Judg 18:22 And when they were a good way from the house of Micah, the men that were in the houses near to Micah's house were gathered together, and overtook the children of Dan.
Iz 63:6 Savo įniršiu sutrypiau tautas, savo pykčiu jas sutriuškinau, kraują jų išliejau ant žemės. "
Isa 63:6 And I will tread down the people in mine anger, and make them drunk in my fury, and I will bring down their strength to the earth.
Lk 24:50 Jėzus nusivedė juos palei Betaniją ir, iškėlęs rankas, palaimino juos.
Lu 24:50 And he led them out as far as to Bethany, and he lifted up his hands, and blessed them.
Ps 48:5 Vos pamatę jį, jie apstulbo; siaubo apimti, jie puolė bėgti.
Ps 48:5 They saw it, and so they marvelled; they were troubled, and hasted away.
Job 26:7 Dievas išskleidžia šiaurinį skliautą virš tuštumos, pakabina žemę ant nieko.
Job 26:7 He stretcheth out the north over the empty place, and hangeth the earth upon nothing.
Dan 1:20 Kai tik karalius kreipdavosi į juos klausimu, reikalaujančiu išminties ir pažinimo, jis rasdavo juos dešimt kartų pranašesnius už visus karalystės magus ir kerėtojus.
Da 1:20 And in all matters of wisdom and understanding, that the king enquired of them, he found them ten times better than all the magicians and astrologers that were in all his realm.
Gg 5:9 [Choras: ] Kuo tavo mylimasis skiriasi iš kitų, o gražiausioji iš moterų? Kuo tavo mylimasis skiriasi iš kitų, kad tu mus taip prisaikdini?
SS 5:9 What is thy beloved more than another beloved, O thou fairest among women? what is thy beloved more than another beloved, that thou dost so charge us?
Apd 26:27 Karaliau Agripa, ar tiki pranašais? Aš žinau, kad tiki. "
Ac 26:27 King Agrippa, believest thou the prophets? I know that thou believest.
1Sam 24:22 Dovydas prisiekė Sauliui. Tada Saulius sugrįžo į namus, o Dovydas ir jo vyrai užkopė į kalnų tvirtovę.
1Sa 24:22 And David sware unto Saul. And Saul went home; but David and his men gat them up unto the hold.
Koh 2:6 Įsitaisiau vandens tvenkinių augančio miško medžiams laistyti.
Ec 2:6 I made me pools of water, to water therewith the wood that bringeth forth trees:
Pr 26:23 Iš čia jis nukeliavo į Beer Šebą.
Ge 26:23 And he went up from thence to Beersheba.
Sk 7:38 aukso lėkštė, sverianti dešimt šekelių, pilna smilkalų,
Nu 7:38 One golden spoon of ten shekels, full of incense:
Ezd 6:4 Teturi jie po tris sluoksnius skaldyto akmens po kiekvienu medžio sluoksniu. Išlaidos turi būti padengtos iš karališkojo iždo.
Ezr 6:4 With three rows of great stones, and a row of new timber: and let the expenses be given out of the king's house:
Joz 3:15 Paprastai Jordano upė per visą pjūtį liejasi per krantus. Vos tik Skrynios nešėjai pasiekė Jordaną ir Skrynią nešusiųjų kunigų kojos palietė vandenį pakrantėje,
Jos 3:15 And as they that bare the ark were come unto Jordan, and the feet of the priests that bare the ark were dipped in the brim of the water, (for Jordan overfloweth all his banks all the time of harvest,)
Iz 8:2 Aš pasirūpinau gauti patikimų liudytojų ­ kunigą Ūriją ir Zachariją, Jeberechijo sūnų, kad jie man paliudytų.
Isa 8:2 And I took unto me faithful witnesses to record, Uriah the priest, and Zechariah the son of Jeberechiah.

Sanctus Corpus Deus