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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Mt 9:5 Kas gi lengviau ­ ar pasakyti: ‘Tavo nuodėmės atleistos’, ar liepti: ‘Kelkis ir vaikščiok! ’?
Mat 9:5 For whether is easier, to say, Thy sins be forgiven thee; or to say, Arise, and walk?
Pr 34:23 Argi tuomet nepriklausys mums jų galvijai ir nuosavybė ­ visi jų gyvuliai? Tik sutikime su jais, ir jie gyvens su mumis. "
Ge 34:23 Shall not their cattle and their substance and every beast of their's be our's? only let us consent unto them, and they will dwell with us.
Ps 83:3 Jie rengia sąmokslus prieš tavo tautą, tariasi prieš tavo globotinius.
Ps 83:3 They have taken crafty counsel against thy people, and consulted against thy hidden ones.
Kun 4:7 Kunigas krauju pavilgys ragus kvapiojo smilkalo aukuro, esančio Viešpaties akivaizdoje Susitikimo Palapinėje, o likusį jaučio kraują išlies prie papėdės deginamųjų aukų aukuro, kuris yra prie Susitikimo Palapinės įėjimo.
Le 4:7 And the priest shall put some of the blood upon the horns of the altar of sweet incense before the LORD, which is in the tabernacle of the congregation; and shall pour all the blood of the bullock at the bottom of the altar of the burnt offering, which is at the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.
Apd 10:44 Petrui tebekalbant šiuos dalykus, Šventoji Dvasia nužengė ant visų, kurie klausėsi žodžio.
Ac 10:44 While Peter yet spake these words, the Holy Ghost fell on all them which heard the word.
Mt 15:22 Ir štai iš ano krašto atėjo viena moteris kanaanietė ir šaukė: "Pasigailėk manęs, Viešpatie, Dovydo Sūnau! Mano dukterį baisiai kankina demonas! "
Mat 15:22 And, behold, a woman of Canaan came out of the same coasts, and cried unto him, saying, Have mercy on me, O Lord, thou son of David; my daughter is grievously vexed with a devil.
Ps 33:5 Jis myli, kas teisu ir teisinga; ištikimósios Viešpaties meilės kupina žemė.
Ps 33:5 He loveth righteousness and judgment: the earth is full of the goodness of the LORD.
Mt 27:27 Valdytojo kareiviai nusivedė Jėzų į įgulos būstinę ir surinko aplink jį visą kuopą.
Mat 27:27 Then the soldiers of the governor took Jesus into the common hall, and gathered unto him the whole band of soldiers.
Ps 136:11 ir išvedė Izraelį iš jų žemės, nes jo ištikimoji meilė amžina,
Ps 136:11 And brought out Israel from among them: for his mercy endureth for ever:
Jn 11:30 O Jėzus dar nebuvo įžengęs į kaimą, bet tebebuvo toje vietoje, kur jį pasitiko Morta.
Jo 11:30 Now Jesus was not yet come into the town, but was in that place where Martha met him.
Joz 23:14 Šiandien, kaip matote, einu visos žemės keliu . Tad visi žinokite visa savo širdimi ir visa savo siela, kad visi gerieji dalykai, Viešpaties jums pažadėti, įvyko, ir nė vienas neliko neįvykdytas.
Jos 23:14 And, behold, this day I am going the way of all the earth: and ye know in all your hearts and in all your souls, that not one thing hath failed of all the good things which the LORD your God spake concerning you; all are come to pass unto you, and not one thing hath failed thereof.
Įst 24:13 Turi sugrąžinti jam užstatą saulei leidžiantis, kad tavo artimas, galėdamas miegoti su savo apdaru, laimintų tave. Tai bus tavo geras darbas Viešpaties, tavo Dievo, akivaizdoje.
De 24:13 In any case thou shalt deliver him the pledge again when the sun goeth down, that he may sleep in his own raiment, and bless thee: and it shall be righteousness unto thee before the LORD thy God.
Iš 10:14 Skėriai užplūdo visą Egipto kraštą ir apsėdo visą Egipto žemę; skėrių spiečius buvo toks tankus, kokio nei anksčiau nebuvo buvę, nei kada nors vėl bus.
Ex 10:14 And the locust went up over all the land of Egypt, and rested in all the coasts of Egypt: very grievous were they; before them there were no such locusts as they, neither after them shall be such.
Jer 4:23 Pažiūrėjau į žemę, ir štaiji nualinta ir dyka! Žvelgiau į dangų, ir nebuvo jame šviesos!
Jer 4:23 I beheld the earth, and, lo, it was without form, and void; and the heavens, and they had no light.
Koh 1:17 Tačiau kai ėmiau širdimi pažinti išminties bei išmanymo prigimtį ir kvailybę bei paikybę, supratau, kad ir tai ­ tik vėjų vaikymasis.
Ec 1:17 And I gave my heart to know wisdom, and to know madness and folly: I perceived that this also is vexation of spirit.
Jer 9:13 Viešpats sako: "Todėl, kad jie atmetė mano Įstatymą, kurį jiems daviau, neklausė mano balso ir nesielgė pagal jį,
Jer 9:13 And the LORD saith, Because they have forsaken my law which I set before them, and have not obeyed my voice, neither walked therein;
Jer 51:2 Pasiųsiu vėtytojus į Babiloną, kad jį išvėtytų ir nuniokotų kraštą. Ak, puls jie nelaimės dieną jį iš visų pusių!
Jer 51:2 And will send unto Babylon fanners, that shall fan her, and shall empty her land: for in the day of trouble they shall be against her round about.
2Kar 2:17 Bet jie tol primygtinai ragino, kol jis pasakė: "Siųskite! " Tada jie išsiuntė penkiasdešimt vyrų, kurie ieškojo Elijo tris dienas, bet nerado.
2Ki 2:17 And when they urged him till he was ashamed, he said, Send. They sent therefore fifty men; and they sought three days, but found him not.
Iš 3:14 Dievas tarė Mozei: "Aš esu, kuris esu. " Ir tęsė: "Tu taip kalbėsi izraelitams: ‘Aš Esu atsiuntė mane pas jus. ’"
Ex 3:14 And God said unto Moses, I AM THAT I AM: and he said, Thus shalt thou say unto the children of Israel, I AM hath sent me unto you.
1Tim 2:14 Be to, Adomas nesidavė suvedžiojamas, o moteris buvo apgauta ir prasižengė.
1Ti 2:14 And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.

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