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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Apd 28:21 Jie atsakė jam: "Mes nesame gavę apie tave iš Judėjos laiškų, ir niekas iš brolių nebuvo atvykęs su blogomis žiniomis ar kalbomis apie tave.
Ac 28:21 And they said unto him, We neither received letters out of Judaea concerning thee, neither any of the brethren that came shewed or spake any harm of thee.
1Kar 8:27 Bet ar iš tikrųjų Dievas gyvens žemėje? Net dangus ir dangaus aukštybės negali tavęs sutalpinti. Kaip galėtų tai padaryti šie Namai, kuriuos aš pastačiau!
1Ki 8:27 But will God indeed dwell on the earth? behold, the heaven and heaven of heavens cannot contain thee; how much less this house that I have builded?
1Kor 7:30 ir kurie verkia, tarsi neverktų, ir kurie džiaugiasi, tarsi nesidžiaugtų, ir kurie perka, tarsi neįsigytų,
1C 7:30 And they that weep, as though they wept not; and they that rejoice, as though they rejoiced not; and they that buy, as though they possessed not;
Rom 11:36 Iš jo, per jį ir jam yra visa. Jam šlovė per amžius! Amen.
Ro 11:36 For of him, and through him, and to him, are all things: to whom be glory for ever. Amen.
2Sam 22:28 Juk tu gelbsti nuolankiuosius, bet su panieka žiūri į išdidžiuosius.
2Sa 22:28 And the afflicted people thou wilt save: but thine eyes are upon the haughty, that thou mayest bring them down.
1Tim 6:14 išlaikyti įsakymą be dėmės ir priekaišto iki pasirodys mūsų Viešpats Jėzus Kristus.
1Ti 6:14 That thou keep this commandment without spot, unrebukable, until the appearing of our Lord Jesus Christ:
Ezd 2:59 O štai sugrįžusieji iš Tel Melacho, Tel Haršos, Kerub Adano ir Imero, nors ir negalėjusieji įrodyti, kad jų protėvių namai ar kilmė buvo izraelitiška:
Ezr 2:59 And these were they which went up from Telmelah, Telharsa, Cherub, Addan, and Immer: but they could not shew their father's house, and their seed, whether they were of Israel:
Kun 24:13 Viešpats kalbėjo Mozei, tardamas:
Le 24:13 And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,
Lk 12:43 Laimingas tarnas, kurį sugrįžęs šeimininkas ras taip darantį.
Lu 12:43 Blessed is that servant, whom his lord when he cometh shall find so doing.
Mk 14:41 Jis ateina trečią kartą ir taria jiems: "Vis dar tebemiegate, tebesiilsite? Gana! Atėjo valanda: štai Žmogaus Sūnus išduodamas į nusidėjėlių rankas.
Mar 14:41 And he cometh the third time, and saith unto them, Sleep on now, and take your rest: it is enough, the hour is come; behold, the Son of man is betrayed into the hands of sinners.
Job 38:16 Argi esi įžengęs į jūros versmesir vaikščiojęs po bedugnės gelmes?
Job 38:16 Hast thou entered into the springs of the sea? or hast thou walked in the search of the depth?
Iš 21:12 Kas mirtinai sumuša žmogų, turi būti nubaustas mirtimi.
Ex 21:12 He that smiteth a man, so that he die, shall be surely put to death.
Kun 13:27 Septintą dieną kunigas apžiūrės jį ir jei opa bus išsiplėtusi odoje, pripažins jį esant nešvarų. Tai raupsų liga.
Le 13:27 And the priest shall look upon him the seventh day: and if it be spread much abroad in the skin, then the priest shall pronounce him unclean: it is the plague of leprosy.
Dan 9:11 Visas Izraelis nusižengė tavo Įstatymui ir atsimetė, atsisakęs paklusti tavo balsui. Todėl prakeikimas ir priesaika, užrašyti Dievo tarno Mozės Įstatyme, buvo išlieti ant mūsų, nes mes tau nusidėjome.
Da 9:11 Yea, all Israel have transgressed thy law, even by departing, that they might not obey thy voice; therefore the curse is poured upon us, and the oath that is written in the law of Moses the servant of God, because we have sinned against him.
Apr 2:20 Bet turiu prieš tave, kad leidi moteriškei Jezabelei, kuri sakosi esanti pranašė, mokyti bei suvedžioti mano tarnus, kad jie ištvirkautų ir valgytų stabams skirtą mėsą.
Re 2:20 Notwithstanding I have a few things against thee, because thou sufferest that woman Jezebel, which calleth herself a prophetess, to teach and to seduce my servants to commit fornication, and to eat things sacrificed unto idols.
Kun 7:11 Štai bendravimo aukos, kuri atnašaujama Viešpačiui, apeigos.
Le 7:11 And this is the law of the sacrifice of peace offerings, which he shall offer unto the LORD.
Ps 19:3 be jokio kalbesio ir be jokių žodžių. Negirdėti jų balso,
Ps 19:3 There is no speech nor language, where their voice is not heard.
Iz 41:13 nes aš, Viešpats, tavo Dievas, laikau tavo dešinę. Aš ­ tas, kuris tau sako: "Nebijok, aš tau padėsiu! "
Isa 41:13 For I the LORD thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee.
Jer 46:27 "O tu, mano tarne Jokūbai, nebijok, nenuogąstauk, Izraelines, tikėk manimi, aš išgelbėsiu tave iš tolimosios vietos, tavo palikuonis iš tremties krašto! Tada Jokūbas sugrįš ir ras ramybę, gyvens saugiai, ir nebus kam jo gąsdinti.
Jer 46:27 But fear not thou, O my servant Jacob, and be not dismayed, O Israel: for, behold, I will save thee from afar off, and thy seed from the land of their captivity; and Jacob shall return, and be in rest and at ease, and none shall make him afraid.
Mt 23:38 Štai jūsų namai bus jums palikti tušti.
Mat 23:38 Behold, your house is left unto you desolate.

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