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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Kun 21:23 Bet kadangi turi trūkumą, už uždangos neis ir prie aukuro nesiartins, kad nesuterštų mano šventų vietų, nes aš, Viešpats, jas pašventinu. ’"
Le 21:23 Only he shall not go in unto the vail, nor come nigh unto the altar, because he hath a blemish; that he profane not my sanctuaries: for I the LORD do sanctify them.
1Kar 2:38 "Įsakymas teisingas, ­ atsakė Šimis karaliui, ­ tavo tarnas taip darys, kaip mano viešpats karalius kalbėjo. " Tad Šimis gyveno Jeruzalėje ilgą laiką.
1Ki 2:38 And Shimei said unto the king, The saying is good: as my lord the king hath said, so will thy servant do. And Shimei dwelt in Jerusalem many days.
1Sam 6:3 Jie tarė: "Jei norite siųsti atgal Izraelio Dievo Skrynią, nesiųskite jos vienos. Turite būtinai jam atsilyginti atnaša už kaltę. Tuomet būsite išgydyti. Kai būsite išsipirkę, kodėl jo ranka neturėtų atsitraukti nuo jūsų? "
1Sa 6:3 And they said, If ye send away the ark of the God of Israel, send it not empty; but in any wise return him a trespass offering: then ye shall be healed, and it shall be known to you why his hand is not removed from you.
Pr 14:6 ir horus Seyro kalnuose iki pat El Parano dykumos pakraščio.
Ge 14:6 And the Horites in their mount Seir, unto Elparan, which is by the wilderness.
Job 22:22 Priimk pamokymą iš jo lūpųir dėkis jo žodžius į širdį.
Job 22:22 Receive, I pray thee, the law from his mouth, and lay up his words in thine heart.
Iš 29:26 Tada paimsi Aarono įvesdinimo į kunigo tarnybą avino krūtinę ir atnašausi ją kaip siūbuojamąją atnašą Viešpaties akivaizdoje. Tai bus tavo dalis.
Ex 29:26 And thou shalt take the breast of the ram of Aaron's consecration, and wave it for a wave offering before the LORD: and it shall be thy part.
2Kar 3:6 Tad karalius Jehoramas nedelsdamas leidosi į žygį iš Samarijos ir pašaukė prie ginklų visą Izraelį.
2Ki 3:6 And king Jehoram went out of Samaria the same time, and numbered all Israel.
Ps 124:2 jeigu Viešpats nebūtų buvęs mūsų pusėje, kai mus užpuolė priešai,
Ps 124:2 If it had not been the LORD who was on our side, when men rose up against us:
Pr 7:11 Šeši šimtaisiais Nojaus gyvenimo metais, antro mėnesio septynioliktą dieną, būtent tą dieną prasiveržė visi didžiosios bedugnės šaltiniai ir atsivėrė visos dangaus skliauto užtūros.
Ge 7:11 In the six hundredth year of Noah's life, in the second month, the seventeenth day of the month, the same day were all the fountains of the great deep broken up, and the windows of heaven were opened.
2Krn 25:9 O Amacijas tarė Dievo vyrui: "Bet ką daryti su tuo šimtu talentų, kuriuos esu davęs Izraelio kariuomenei? " Dievo žmogus atsakė: "Viešpats turi iš ko tau kur kas daugiau duoti. "
2Ch 25:9 And Amaziah said to the man of God, But what shall we do for the hundred talents which I have given to the army of Israel? And the man of God answered, The LORD is able to give thee much more than this.
1Kar 2:13 Hagitos sūnus Adonijas atėjo pas Saliamono motiną Batšebą. "Ar tu ateini taikingai? " ­ paklausė ji. "Taikingai, ­ atsakė jis.
1Ki 2:13 And Adonijah the son of Haggith came to Bathsheba the mother of Solomon. And she said, Comest thou peaceably? And he said, Peaceably.
Iz 41:16 Kai vėtysi, vėjas juos nuneš, audra juos išblaškys. O tu džiaugsiesi Viešpačiu, šlovinsi Izraelio Šventąjį.
Isa 41:16 Thou shalt fan them, and the wind shall carry them away, and the whirlwind shall scatter them: and thou shalt rejoice in the LORD, and shalt glory in the Holy One of Israel.
Apr 6:12 Aš mačiau, kaip jis atplėšė šeštąjį antspaudą. Tuomet kilo didelis žemės drebėjimas, saulė pasidarė juoda kaip ašutinis maišas, visas mėnulis paraudo lyg kraujas,
Re 6:12 And I beheld when he had opened the sixth seal, and, lo, there was a great earthquake; and the sun became black as sackcloth of hair, and the moon became as blood;
2Kar 6:27 "Neprašyk manęs! ­ atkirto jis. ­ Viešpats tau tepadeda! Iš kurgi aš galiu tau pagalbos imti? Nuo klojimo aslos ar iš vynuogių spaudyklos? "
2Ki 6:27 And he said, If the LORD do not help thee, whence shall I help thee? out of the barnfloor, or out of the winepress?
Mk 5:10 Ir pradėjo labai prašytis nevaryti jų iš to krašto.
Mar 5:10 And he besought him much that he would not send them away out of the country.
1Kar 12:2 Nebato sūnus Jeroboamas sužinojo apie tai dar Egipte. Mat Jeroboamas buvo pabėgęs nuo karaliaus Saliamono ir apsigyvenęs Egipte.
1Ki 12:2 And it came to pass, when Jeroboam the son of Nebat, who was yet in Egypt, heard of it, (for he was fled from the presence of king Solomon, and Jeroboam dwelt in Egypt;)
Ps 105:17 Jis pasiuntė jiems vyrą ­ Juozapą, parduotą kaip vergą.
Ps 105:17 He sent a man before them, even Joseph, who was sold for a servant:
2Krn 21:7 Tačiau Viešpats Dovydo namų sunaikinti nenorėjo dėl Sandoros, kurią buvo padaręs su Dovydu, pažadėdamas jam ir jo palikuonims duoti amžiną žiburį.
2Ch 21:7 Howbeit the LORD would not destroy the house of David, because of the covenant that he had made with David, and as he promised to give a light to him and to his sons for ever.
Kun 25:33 Kiekvieni levitų namai jų miestuose, buvę parduoti ir neatpirkti, bus perduoti savininkui jubiliejaus metais, nes namai levitų miestuose yra jų paveldima nuosavybė tarp izraelitų.
Le 25:33 And if a man purchase of the Levites, then the house that was sold, and the city of his possession, shall go out in the year of jubile: for the houses of the cities of the Levites are their possession among the children of Israel.
Mk 15:40 Ten buvo moterų, kurios žiūrėjo iš tolo; tarp jų Marija Magdalena, Marija ­ Jokūbo Jaunesniojo ir Jozės motina ­ ir Salomė.
Mar 15:40 There were also women looking on afar off: among whom was Mary Magdalene, and Mary the mother of James the less and of Joses, and Salome;

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