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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Ps 128:3 Tavo žmona bus lyg vaisingas vynmedistavo namuose, o vaikai ­ lyg vynmedžio atžalosprie tavo stalo.
Ps 128:3 Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olive plants round about thy table.
Iz 18:1 Ak, dūzgiančių vabzdžių žeme anapus Kušo upių,
Isa 18:1 Woe to the land shadowing with wings, which is beyond the rivers of Ethiopia:
Jer 48:4 ‘Moabas sunaikintas! ’ ­klykia jo mažieji.
Jer 48:4 Moab is destroyed; her little ones have caused a cry to be heard.
Joz 8:20 Kai Ajo vyrai pažvelgė atgal, miesto dūmai jau kilo ligi padangių! Jiems stigo jėgų net kur nors pabėgti, kai dykumos link bėgę žmonės atsisuko jų pulti.
Jos 8:20 And when the men of Ai looked behind them, they saw, and, behold, the smoke of the city ascended up to heaven, and they had no power to flee this way or that way: and the people that fled to the wilderness turned back upon the pursuers.
Lk 23:14 pareiškė: "Jūs atvedėte man šį žmogų, kaltindami jį liaudies kurstymu. Bet aš, jį apklausęs jūsų akyse, neradau nė vienos jam primetamos kaltės;
Lu 23:14 Said unto them, Ye have brought this man unto me, as one that perverteth the people: and, behold, I, having examined him before you, have found no fault in this man touching those things whereof ye accuse him:
Įst 10:3 Padirbau skrynią iš akacijos medžio, nusitašiau dvi akmens plokštes, tokias kaip pirmąsias, ir užkopiau ant kalno su dviem plokštėmis rankose.
De 10:3 And I made an ark of shittim wood, and hewed two tables of stone like unto the first, and went up into the mount, having the two tables in mine hand.
Sk 15:14 Jei ateivis, gyvenantis su jumis ar jūsų palikuonimis norėtų paaukoti malonaus kvapo ugninę atnašą Viešpačiui, kaip jūs darote, taip ir jis tedaro.
Nu 15:14 And if a stranger sojourn with you, or whosoever be among you in your generations, and will offer an offering made by fire, of a sweet savour unto the LORD; as ye do, so he shall do.
Mt 7:11 Tad jei jūs, būdami nelabi, mokate savo vaikams duoti gerų daiktų, juo labiau jūsų dangiškasis Tėvas duos gera tiems, kurie jį prašo.
Mat 7:11 If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?
2Kar 18:5 Ezekijas pasitikėjo tik Viešpačiu, Izraelio Dievu. Panašaus į jį nebuvo tarp visų Judo karalių nei po jo, nei iki jo.
2Ki 18:5 He trusted in the LORD God of Israel; so that after him was none like him among all the kings of Judah, nor any that were before him.
Sk 22:27 Pamačiusi Viešpaties angelą, asilė susmuko po Bileamu. Bileamas įniršo ir mušė asilę lazda.
Nu 22:27 And when the ass saw the angel of the LORD, she fell down under Balaam: and Balaam's anger was kindled, and he smote the ass with a staff.
Apr 2:10 Nebijok būsimųjų kentėjimų! Štai velnias įmes kai kuriuos jūsiškius į kalėjimą, kad būtumėte išbandyti. Jūsų laukia dešimties dienų priespauda. Būk ištikimas iki mirties, ir aš tau duosiu gyvenimo vainiką! ’
Re 2:10 Fear none of those things which thou shalt suffer: behold, the devil shall cast some of you into prison, that ye may be tried; and ye shall have tribulation ten days: be thou faithful unto death, and I will give thee a crown of life.
Ef 5:28 Taip ir vyrai privalo mylėti savo žmonas tartum savuosius kūnus. Kas myli žmoną, myli save patį.
Ep 5:28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
1Kor 6:1 Kaipgi kai kurie jūsų drįsta by linėtis vieni su kitais pas neteisiuosius, o ne pas šventuosius?
1C 6:1 Dare any of you, having a matter against another, go to law before the unjust, and not before the saints?
Rd 3:50 kolei Viešpats nepažvelgs iš dangausir nepamatys.
La 3:50 Till the LORD look down, and behold from heaven.
Žyd 2:9 Tačiau regime tą rumpam laikui padarytą mažesnį negu angelai, kad Dievo malone už kiekvieną jis paragautų mirties ­ Jėzų, už mirties kentėjimus apvainikuotą didybe ir garbe.
He 2:9 But we see Jesus, who was made a little lower than the angels for the suffering of death, crowned with glory and honour; that he by the grace of God should taste death for every man.
Žyd 4:12 Dievo žodis yra gyvas, veiksmingas, aštresnis už bet kokį dviašmenį kalaviją. Jis prasiskverbia iki sielos ir dvasios atšakos, iki sąnarių ir kaulų smegenų, ir teisia širdies sumanymus bei mintis.
He 4:12 For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.
Oz 2:3 Antraip aš ją išrengsiu nuogai, paliksiu, kokia ji buvo gimimo dieną, padarysiu ją panašią į dykumą, paversiu ją tyrlaukiaisir leisiu jai mirti nuo troškulio.
Ho 2:3 Lest I strip her naked, and set her as in the day that she was born, and make her as a wilderness, and set her like a dry land, and slay her with thirst.
Iz 3:9 Pats jų pasipūtimas juos pasmerkia, jie didžiuojasi savo nuodėmėmis kaip Sodomair neslepia jų. Vargas jiems! Jie patys užsitraukia nelaimę.
Isa 3:9 The shew of their countenance doth witness against them; and they declare their sin as Sodom, they hide it not. Woe unto their soul! for they have rewarded evil unto themselves.
Iz 60:19 Tau dienos šviesa nebebus saulėnei naktį nebešvies mėnulis, bet Viešpats bus tau amžina šviesa, tavo Dievas ­ tavo spindesys.
Isa 60:19 The sun shall be no more thy light by day; neither for brightness shall the moon give light unto thee: but the LORD shall be unto thee an everlasting light, and thy God thy glory.
Lk 7:9 Tai girdėdamas, Jėzus stebėjosi šimtininku ir, atsigręžęs į jį lydinčią minią, tarė: "Sakau jums ­ nė Izraelyje neradau tokio didelio tikėjimo. "
Lu 7:9 When Jesus heard these things, he marvelled at him, and turned him about, and said unto the people that followed him, I say unto you, I have not found so great faith, no, not in Israel.

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