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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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1Sam 25:37 Kitą rytą, kai vynas buvo iš Nabalo išgaravęs, žmona papasakojo jam visa, kas buvo įvykę. Širdis jam apmirė krūtinėje, ir jis tarsi suakmenėjo.
1Sa 25:37 But it came to pass in the morning, when the wine was gone out of Nabal, and his wife had told him these things, that his heart died within him, and he became as a stone.
Lk 20:19 Aukštieji kunigai ir Rašto aiškintojai buvo benorį dar tą pačią valandą jį suimti, bet pabijojo žmonių. Mat jie suprato, kad šis palyginimas buvo jiems taikomas.
Lu 20:19 And the chief priests and the scribes the same hour sought to lay hands on him; and they feared the people: for they perceived that he had spoken this parable against them.
Jer 14:12 Kai jie pasninkaus, aš negirdėsiu jų maldavimo, kai aukos deginamąsias aukas ir maisto atnašas, aš jų nepriimsiu. Kalaviju, badu ir maro rykšte padarysiu jiems galą. "
Jer 14:12 When they fast, I will not hear their cry; and when they offer burnt offering and an oblation, I will not accept them: but I will consume them by the sword, and by the famine, and by the pestilence.
1Kor 9:7 Kas gi tarnauja kariuomenėje už savo paties pinigus? kas sodina vynuogyną ir nevalgo jo vaisių? arba kas gano bandą ir neminta bandos pienu?
1C 9:7 Who goeth a warfare any time at his own charges? who planteth a vineyard, and eateth not of the fruit thereof? or who feedeth a flock, and eateth not of the milk of the flock?
1Kar 2:41 Kai Saliamonui buvo pranešta, kad Šimis buvo nuvykęs iš Jeruzalės į Gatą ir sugrįžo,
1Ki 2:41 And it was told Solomon that Shimei had gone from Jerusalem to Gath, and was come again.
Pr 20:9 Tuomet Abimelechas pasišaukė Abraomą ir tarė jam: "Ką tu padarei! Kuo aš tau nusidėjau, kad užtraukei tokią didelę kaltę man ir mano karalystei? Padarei man dalykų, kurie neturėtų būti daromi.
Ge 20:9 Then Abimelech called Abraham, and said unto him, What hast thou done unto us? and what have I offended thee, that thou hast brought on me and on my kingdom a great sin? thou hast done deeds unto me that ought not to be done.
Pat 31:18 ט Ji mato, kad jos verslas klesti; naktį jos žibintas niekada neprigęsta.
Pr 31:18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.
Mk 10:27 Jėzus pažvelgė į juos ir tarė: "Tai neįmanoma žmonėms, bet ne Dievui: Dievui viskas įmanoma. "
Mar 10:27 And Jesus looking upon them saith, With men it is impossible, but not with God: for with God all things are possible.
Įst 28:25 Viešpats privers tave bėgti nuo savo priešų; išžygiuosi prieš juos vienu keliu, bet bėgsi nuo jų septyniais keliais. Tapsi pasibaisėjimu visoms žemės karalystėms.
De 28:25 The LORD shall cause thee to be smitten before thine enemies: thou shalt go out one way against them, and flee seven ways before them: and shalt be removed into all the kingdoms of the earth.
Pr 9:27 Tepadaro Dievas vietos Jafetui, teleidžia jam gyventi Semo palapinėse, o Kanaanas tebūna jų vergas. "
Ge 9:27 God shall enlarge Japheth, and he shall dwell in the tents of Shem; and Canaan shall be his servant.
Ef 4:30 Ir neliūdinkite Šventosios Dievo Dvasios, kuria esate paženklinti atpirkimo dienai.
Ep 4:30 And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption.
Iz 3:13 Viešpats pakyla vesti bylos, stojasi teisti savo tautos.
Isa 3:13 The LORD standeth up to plead, and standeth to judge the people.
Mt 25:16 Tas, kuris gavo penkis talentus, tuojau nuėjęs ėmė verstis ir pelnė kitus penkis.
Mat 25:16 Then he that had received the five talents went and traded with the same, and made them other five talents.
Įst 30:15 Žiūrėk! Šiandien padėjau prieš tave gyvenimą ir gerovę, mirtį ir pražūtį.
De 30:15 See, I have set before thee this day life and good, and death and evil;
Oz 14:9 Kas išmintingas, tas tesvarsto šiuos dalykus, kas protingas, tas teišmano juos. Tiesūs Viešpaties keliai, ir teisieji jais eina, o nusidėjėliai juose suklumpa.
Ho 14:9 Who is wise, and he shall understand these things? prudent, and he shall know them? for the ways of the LORD are right, and the just shall walk in them: but the transgressors shall fall therein.
2Tes 1:7 o jums, engiamiesiems, ­ atilsiu drauge su mumis, kai Viešpats Jėzus su savo galybės angelais apsireikš iš dangaus
2Th 1:7 And to you who are troubled rest with us, when the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from heaven with his mighty angels,
Pr 5:14 Taigi iš viso Kenanas gyveno devynis šimtus dešimt metų. Po to jis mirė.
Ge 5:14 And all the days of Cainan were nine hundred and ten years: and he died.
Jn 11:36 Tada žydai ėmė kalbėti: "Štai kaip jis jį mylėjo! "
Jo 11:36 Then said the Jews, Behold how he loved him!
Joz 6:19 Visas sidabras ir auksas, daiktai iš vario ir geležies yra šventi Viešpačiui. Jie bus padėti į Viešpaties iždą. "
Jos 6:19 But all the silver, and gold, and vessels of brass and iron, are consecrated unto the LORD: they shall come into the treasury of the LORD.
Įst 20:8 Apskaitininkai, toliau kalbėdami kariams, sakys: ‘Ar yra kas nors išsigandęs ir nusiminęs? Teeina jis namo, kad per jį brolių drąsa neišblėstų. ’
De 20:8 And the officers shall speak further unto the people, and they shall say, What man is there that is fearful and fainthearted? let him go and return unto his house, lest his brethren's heart faint as well as his heart.

Sanctus Corpus Deus