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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Neh 6:7 Be to, tu net pranašus paskyrei, kad Jeruzalėje apie tave skelbtų: ‘Jude yra karalius! ’ Žodis apie šiuos dalykus tikrai pasieks karalių. Todėl eikš, pasitarkime. "
Ne 6:7 And thou hast also appointed prophets to preach of thee at Jerusalem, saying, There is a king in Judah: and now shall it be reported to the king according to these words. Come now therefore, and let us take counsel together.
Pat 26:1 Kaip sniegas vasarą ar lietus pjūties metu, taip nepageidautina garbė kvailiui.
Pr 26:1 As snow in summer, and as rain in harvest, so honour is not seemly for a fool.
Pr 29:26 Labanas atsakė: "Mūsų šalyje taip nedaroma, jaunesnioji už vyro neišleidžiama prieš pirmagimę.
Ge 29:26 And Laban said, It must not be so done in our country, to give the younger before the firstborn.
Dan 10:19 Jis tarė: ‘Nebijok, brangusis žmogau, ramybė tau! Būk tvirtas ir drąsus! ’ Jam bekalbant, sustiprėjau ir tariau: ‘Kalbėk, mano viešpatie, nes davei man jėgų. ’
Da 10:19 And said, O man greatly beloved, fear not: peace be unto thee, be strong, yea, be strong. And when he had spoken unto me, I was strengthened, and said, Let my lord speak; for thou hast strengthened me.
Job 11:11 Juk jis žino, kas yra veidmainiai, ir mato nedorybę. Tad nejau jos neatpažintų?
Job 11:11 For he knoweth vain men: he seeth wickedness also; will he not then consider it?
1Kor 3:6 Aš sodinau, Apolas laistė, o Dievas augino.
1C 3:6 I have planted, Apollos watered; but God gave the increase.
Pr 2:6 tik versmė trykšdavo iš žemės ir drėkindavo visą dirvos paviršių, ­
Ge 2:6 But there went up a mist from the earth, and watered the whole face of the ground.
Įst 5:24 ir sakėte: ‘Štai Viešpats, mūsų Dievas, ką tik mums parodė savo šlovę ir didybę, ir mes girdėjome jo balsą iš ugnies. Šiandien patyrėme, kad žmogus gali išlikti gyvas, nors jam yra kalbėjęs Dievas.
De 5:24 And ye said, Behold, the LORD our God hath shewed us his glory and his greatness, and we have heard his voice out of the midst of the fire: we have seen this day that God doth talk with man, and he liveth.
2Sam 5:11 Tyro karalius Hiramas atsiuntė pas Dovydą pasiuntinius drauge su kedro rąstais, dailidėmis ir mūrininkais. Jie pastatė Dovydui rūmus.
2Sa 5:11 And Hiram king of Tyre sent messengers to David, and cedar trees, and carpenters, and masons: and they built David an house.
Gal 3:4 Argi tiek daug esate iškentėję veltui? O, iš tiesų būtų veltui! . .
Ga 3:4 Have ye suffered so many things in vain? if it be yet in vain.
Ps 75:5 Sakau jiems: ‘Nekelkite ragų! Liaukitės įžūliai kalbėti! ’"
Ps 75:5 Lift not up your horn on high: speak not with a stiff neck.
Sk 7:53 ir du jaučiai, penki avinai, penki ožiai bei penki mituliai avinėliai bendravimo aukai. Tokia buvo Amihudo sūnaus Elišamos atnaša.
Nu 7:53 And for a sacrifice of peace offerings, two oxen, five rams, five he goats, five lambs of the first year: this was the offering of Elishama the son of Ammihud.
Mk 7:4 Taip pat sugrįžę iš turgaus jie nevalgo neapsiplovę. Be to, yra dar daug nuostatų, kurių jie laikosi, sekdami papročiu, pavyzdžiui, taurių, puodelių bei varinių indų plovimo.
Mar 7:4 And when they come from the market, except they wash, they eat not. And many other things there be, which they have received to hold, as the washing of cups, and pots, brasen vessels, and of tables.
Lk 8:22 Vieną dieną Jėzus su mokiniais įlipo į valtį ir pasakė: "Irkimės anapus ežero! " Jie atsistūmė nuo kranto.
Lu 8:22 Now it came to pass on a certain day, that he went into a ship with his disciples: and he said unto them, Let us go over unto the other side of the lake. And they launched forth.
Ez 11:13 Atsitiko taip, kad man pranašaujant Benajos sūnus Pelatijas numirė. Tuomet parpuoliau veidu žemyn ir visu balsu šaukiau, sakydamas: "Ak, Viešpatie DIEVE! Nejau tu nori padaryti galą Izraelio likučiui? ! "
Eze 11:13 And it came to pass, when I prophesied, that Pelatiah the son of Benaiah died. Then fell I down upon my face, and cried with a loud voice, and said, Ah Lord GOD! wilt thou make a full end of the remnant of Israel?
Oz 3:4 Juk ir izraelitai pasiliks ilgą laiką be karaliaus ir didžiūno, be aukų ir šventųjų stulpų, be efodo ir terafimų.
Ho 3:4 For the children of Israel shall abide many days without a king, and without a prince, and without a sacrifice, and without an image, and without an ephod, and without teraphim:
Sk 16:19 Kai Korachas surinko priešais juos prie Susitikimo Palapinės įėjimo visą bendriją, tada Viešpaties šlovė pasirodė visai bendrijai.
Nu 16:19 And Korah gathered all the congregation against them unto the door of the tabernacle of the congregation: and the glory of the LORD appeared unto all the congregation.
Ts 18:1 Anomis dienomis Izraelyje nebuvo karaliaus. Taigi anomis dienomis Dano giminės žmonės ieškojo sau žemės, kur galėtų įsikurti, nes iki tol nebuvo jiems tekęs paveldas tarp Izraelio giminių.
Judg 18:1 In those days there was no king in Israel: and in those days the tribe of the Danites sought them an inheritance to dwell in; for unto that day all their inheritance had not fallen unto them among the tribes of Israel.
Joz 18:27 Rekemas, Irpeelis, Tarala,
Jos 18:27 And Rekem, and Irpeel, and Taralah,
Ez 48:2 Prie Dano žemės, nuo rytinės ribos iki vakarinės ribos, bus Ašeras ­ viena dalis.
Eze 48:2 And by the border of Dan, from the east side unto the west side, a portion for Asher.

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