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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Jn 2:1 Trečią dieną Galilėjos Kanoje buvo vestuvės. Jose dalyvavo Jėzaus motina.
Jo 2:1 And the third day there was a marriage in Cana of Galilee; and the mother of Jesus was there:
Iz 19:22 Tada Viešpats, nors ir smarkiai nuplakęs Egiptą, jį išgydys. Egiptiečiai kreipsis į Viešpatį, jis išgirs jų maldas ir juos išgydys.
Isa 19:22 And the LORD shall smite Egypt: he shall smite and heal it: and they shall return even to the LORD, and he shall be intreated of them, and shall heal them.
Iz 9:21 Manasas ryja Efraimą, o Efraimas ­ Manasą. Abu jie ryja Judą. Todėl jo pyktis neatlyžo, jo ranka vis dar pakelta!
Isa 9:21 Manasseh, Ephraim; and Ephraim, Manasseh: and they together shall be against Judah. For all this his anger is not turned away, but his hand is stretched out still.
Ez 22:22 Kaip sidabras ištirpsta lydyklos žaizdre, taip ir jūs būsite ištirpdyti. Tuomet žinosite, kad aš, Viešpats, išliejau ant jūsų savo įniršį. "
Eze 22:22 As silver is melted in the midst of the furnace, so shall ye be melted in the midst thereof; and ye shall know that I the LORD have poured out my fury upon you.
2Krn 8:3 Saliamonas surengė žygį prieš Hamat Cobą ir ją paėmė.
2Ch 8:3 And Solomon went to Hamathzobah, and prevailed against it.
Jer 32:36 Todėl dabar taip kalba Viešpats, Izraelio Dievas, apie šį miestą, kuris, kaip jūs sakote, kalaviju, badu ir maru atiduodamas Babilono karaliui į rankas:
Jer 32:36 And now therefore thus saith the LORD, the God of Israel, concerning this city, whereof ye say, It shall be delivered into the hand of the king of Babylon by the sword, and by the famine, and by the pestilence;
Fm 1:3 malonė jums ir ramybė nuo Dievo, mūsų Tėvo, ir Jėzaus Kristaus, mūsų Viešpaties!
Phm 1:3 Grace to you, and peace, from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
Pat 17:17 Bičiulis visada bičiulis, bet brolis gimęs vargu dalytis.
Pr 17:17 A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.
1Krn 5:6 šio sūnus Beera (Asirijos karalius Tilgat Pileseras išvarė jį į tremtį) ­ rubenų vadas.
1Ch 5:6 Beerah his son, whom Tilgathpilneser king of Assyria carried away captive: he was prince of the Reubenites.
Gg 4:7 Visa tu graži, mano meile, nėra tavyje dėmės.
SS 4:7 Thou art all fair, my love; there is no spot in thee.
Apr 12:3 Pasirodė ir kitas ženklas danguje: štai didžiulis ugniaspalvis slibinas su septyniomis galvomis, su dešimčia ragų ir su septyniomis diademomis ant galvų.
Re 12:3 And there appeared another wonder in heaven; and behold a great red dragon, having seven heads and ten horns, and seven crowns upon his heads.
Ps 116:13 Kelsiu išganymo taurę ir vardu šauksiuosi Viešpaties.
Ps 116:13 I will take the cup of salvation, and call upon the name of the LORD.
Rut 1:11 Noomė atsakė: "Grįžkite atgal, mano dukterys! Kodėl turėtumėte eiti su manimi? Argi aš turiu savo įsčiose kitų sūnų, kurie galėtų tapti jūsų vyrais?
Ru 1:11 And Naomi said, Turn again, my daughters: why will ye go with me? are there yet any more sons in my womb, that they may be your husbands?
Joz 15:1 Paveldo dalis, burtų keliu atitekusi Judo giminės žmonėms pagal jų kiltis, tęsėsi labai toli į pietus iki pat Edomo ribos ­ Cino dykumos.
Jos 15:1 This then was the lot of the tribe of the children of Judah by their families; even to the border of Edom the wilderness of Zin southward was the uttermost part of the south coast.
2Kar 15:17 Trisdešimt devintais Judo karaliaus Azarijos metais Izraelio karaliumi tapo Gadžio sūnus Menahemas. Samarijoje jis karaliavo dešimt metų.
2Ki 15:17 In the nine and thirtieth year of Azariah king of Judah began Menahem the son of Gadi to reign over Israel, and reigned ten years in Samaria.
2Pt 2:21 Jiems būtų buvę geriau iš viso nepažinti teisumo kelio, negu, jį pažinus, nusigręžti nuo jiems duoto šventojo įsakymo.
2P 2:21 For it had been better for them not to have known the way of righteousness, than, after they have known it, to turn from the holy commandment delivered unto them.
Jer 32:34 Anaiptol, jie suteršė Namus, kurie vadinami mano vardu, pasistatydami juose savo bjaurius stabus.
Jer 32:34 But they set their abominations in the house, which is called by my name, to defile it.
2Krn 35:11 Paschos avinėliai buvo pjaunami, kunigai šlakstė kraują, o levitai dyrė kailius.
2Ch 35:11 And they killed the passover, and the priests sprinkled the blood from their hands, and the Levites flayed them.
Lk 12:25 Kas gi jūsų galėtų savo rūpesčiu bent per sprindį prailginti sau gyvenimą? !
Lu 12:25 And which of you with taking thought can add to his stature one cubit?
Iz 50:8 Mano gynėjas arti; kas drįs su manimi bylinėtis? Stokime vienas prieš kitą teisman! Kas kelia bylą prieš mane? Tegu man prisistato!
Isa 50:8 He is near that justifieth me; who will contend with me? let us stand together: who is mine adversary? let him come near to me.

Sanctus Corpus Deus