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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Job 8:21 Juokas vėl pripildys tavo burną, ir džiugesio šauksmai bus tavo lūpose.
Job 8:21 Till he fill thy mouth with laughing, and thy lips with rejoicing.
Rom 8:18 Aš esu tikras, jog šio laiko kentėjimai negali lygintis su būsimąja garbe, kuri mumyse bus apreikšta.
Ro 8:18 For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.
Jn 8:37 Aš žinau, kad jūs Abraomo vaikai. Bet jūs norite mane nužudyti, nes mano žodis netarpsta jumyse.
Jo 8:37 I know that ye are Abraham's seed; but ye seek to kill me, because my word hath no place in you.
Lk 15:3 Tuomet Jėzus pasakė jiems palyginimą:
Lu 15:3 And he spake this parable unto them, saying,
1Kor 14:8 Ir jeigu trimitas duotų neaiškų garsą, kas rengtųsi į mūšį?
1C 14:8 For if the trumpet give an uncertain sound, who shall prepare himself to the battle?
Kun 13:22 O jei ji odoje plečiasi, kunigas pripažins jį esant nešvarų. Tai liga.
Le 13:22 And if it spread much abroad in the skin, then the priest shall pronounce him unclean: it is a plague.
Pr 36:14 Cibeono sūnaus Anos dukters Oholibamos sūnūs: Jeušas, Jalamas, Korahas; juos ji pagimdė Ezavui.
Ge 36:14 And these were the sons of Aholibamah, the daughter of Anah the daughter of Zibeon, Esau's wife: and she bare to Esau Jeush, and Jaalam, and Korah.
2Kar 14:4 Tačiau aukštumų alkai nebuvo išnaikinti, žmonės ir toliau ten atnašavo aukas ir degino smilkalus.
2Ki 14:4 Howbeit the high places were not taken away: as yet the people did sacrifice and burnt incense on the high places.
Iz 27:7 Ar jis buvo taip muštas, kaip buvo muštas jo mušėjas? Ar jis patyrė tokias pat žudyneskaip jo žudytojai?
Isa 27:7 Hath he smitten him, as he smote those that smote him? or is he slain according to the slaughter of them that are slain by him?
Ts 9:29 O kad tie žmonės būtų man pavaldūs! Aš tuoj pat išjočiau Abimelechą! Sakyčiau Abimelechui: ‘Sutelk savo kariuomenę ir ateik! ’"
Judg 9:29 And would to God this people were under my hand! then would I remove Abimelech. And he said to Abimelech, Increase thine army, and come out.
Pat 3:4 Taip rasi malonę ir gerą vardąDievo ir žmonių akyse.
Pr 3:4 So shalt thou find favour and good understanding in the sight of God and man.
Ez 17:2 "Žmogau, užmink mįslę ir papasakok palyginimą Izraelio namams.
Eze 17:2 Son of man, put forth a riddle, and speak a parable unto the house of Israel;
Sk 9:18 Viešpačiui įsakius, izraelitai iškeliaudavo ir, Viešpačiui įsakius, įsirengdavo stovyklą. Kol debesis laikydavosi viršum Padangtės, tol jie pasilikdavo stovykloje.
Nu 9:18 At the commandment of the LORD the children of Israel journeyed, and at the commandment of the LORD they pitched: as long as the cloud abode upon the tabernacle they rested in their tents.
Ps 119:174 Ilgiuosi tavo išganymo, Viešpatie, ir žaviuosi tavo Įstatymu.
Ps 119:174 I have longed for thy salvation, O LORD; and thy law is my delight.
Neh 12:47 Ir Zerubabelio dienomis, ir Nehemijo dienomis visas Izraelis kasdien davė dalį giesmininkams ir vartininkams. Buvo atidedama į šalį, kas skirta levitams, o levitai atidėdavo į šalį, kas skirta Aarono palikuonims.
Ne 12:47 And all Israel in the days of Zerubbabel, and in the days of Nehemiah, gave the portions of the singers and the porters, every day his portion: and they sanctified holy things unto the Levites; and the Levites sanctified them unto the children of Aaron.
1Kor 2:16 Kas gi yra suvokęs Viešpaties mintį, kad galėtų jį pamokyti? O mes turime Kristaus išmonę.
1C 2:16 For who hath known the mind of the Lord, that he may instruct him? but we have the mind of Christ.
1Krn 6:60 Taip pat iš Benjamino giminės buvo paskirta Geba su ganyklomis, Alemetas su ganyklomis ir Anatotas su ganyklomis. Iš viso per visas kiltis jie turėjo trylika miestų.
1Ch 6:60 And out of the tribe of Benjamin; Geba with her suburbs, and Alemeth with her suburbs, and Anathoth with her suburbs. All their cities throughout their families were thirteen cities.
Ps 23:2 Žaliose pievose jis mane guldo, prie ramių vandenų gano.
Ps 23:2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
Ez 8:16 Tuomet jis įvedė mane į Viešpaties Namų vidinį kiemą, ir štai prie angos į Viešpaties šventyklą, tarp prieangio ir aukuro, stovėjo maždaug dvidešimt penki vyrai nugaromis į Viešpaties šventyklą ir veidu atsigręžę į rytų pusę, parpuolę kniūbsti ant žemės prieš rytų pusėje tekančią saulę.
Eze 8:16 And he brought me into the inner court of the LORD's house, and, behold, at the door of the temple of the LORD, between the porch and the altar, were about five and twenty men, with their backs toward the temple of the LORD, and their faces toward the east; and they worshipped the sun toward the east.
Pr 14:12 pagrobdami ir Sodomoje gyvenusį Abromo brolio sūnų Lotą su jo turtais.
Ge 14:12 And they took Lot, Abram's brother's son, who dwelt in Sodom, and his goods, and departed.

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