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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Lk 20:31 paskui trečiasis ir paeiliui visi septyni, ir mirė, nepalikdami vaikų.
Lu 20:31 And the third took her; and in like manner the seven also: and they left no children, and died.
Ps 89:35 Visiems laikams prisiekiau savo šventumu, ir Dovydui niekada nemeluosiu.
Ps 89:35 Once have I sworn by my holiness that I will not lie unto David.
Apr 3:1 Sardų Banyčios angelui rašyk: ‘Tai sako tas, kuris laiko septynias Dievo dvasias ir septynias žvaigždes. Aš žinau tavo darbus: tave vadina gyvu, o tu esi miręs.
Re 3:1 And unto the angel of the church in Sardis write; These things saith he that hath the seven Spirits of God, and the seven stars; I know thy works, that thou hast a name that thou livest, and art dead.
Sk 30:5 Bet jei tėvas pareiškia nepritarimą tą dieną, kai apie tai išgirdo, joks jos įžadas ir joks pažadas, kuriuo ji įsipareigojo, negalios. Viešpats jai atleis, nes jos tėvas buvo pareiškęs nepritarimą.
Nu 30:5 But if her father disallow her in the day that he heareth; not any of her vows, or of her bonds wherewith she hath bound her soul, shall stand: and the LORD shall forgive her, because her father disallowed her.
Sk 32:28 Mozė davė dėl jų įsakymą kunigui Eleazarui, Nūno sūnui Jozuei ir izraelitų protėvių namų galvoms.
Nu 32:28 So concerning them Moses commanded Eleazar the priest, and Joshua the son of Nun, and the chief fathers of the tribes of the children of Israel:
Mt 19:20 Jaunuolis tarė: "Aš viso to laikausi. Ko dar man trūksta? "
Mat 19:20 The young man saith unto him, All these things have I kept from my youth up: what lack I yet?
Job 37:24 Todėl žmonės jo pagarbiai bijo, bet jis negerbia žmogaus, laikančio save išmintingu. "
Job 37:24 Men do therefore fear him: he respecteth not any that are wise of heart.
1Sam 7:1 Kirjat Jearimų žmonės atėjo, paėmė Viešpaties Skrynią ir nunešė į Abinadabo namus ant kalvos. Jo sūnų Eleazarą jie pašventino rūpintis Viešpaties Skrynia.
1Sa 7:1 And the men of Kirjathjearim came, and fetched up the ark of the LORD, and brought it into the house of Abinadab in the hill, and sanctified Eleazar his son to keep the ark of the LORD.
Joz 14:5 Kaip Viešpats buvo Mozei įsakęs, taip izraelitai ir darė, dalydami kraštą.
Jos 14:5 As the LORD commanded Moses, so the children of Israel did, and they divided the land.
Ps 114:8 kuris paverčia uolas vandens tvenkiniais, o titnagą ­ tekančiais šaltiniais!
Ps 114:8 Which turned the rock into a standing water, the flint into a fountain of waters.
Iz 54:16 Žiūrėk! Aš sukūriau kalvį, kuris įpučia anglyse ugnįir nusikala įrankį, tinkamą darbui. Aš sukūriau ir niokotoją, kuriam skirta naikinti.
Isa 54:16 Behold, I have created the smith that bloweth the coals in the fire, and that bringeth forth an instrument for his work; and I have created the waster to destroy.
1Sam 17:41 Tuo tarpu filistinas artinosi prie Dovydo su savo skydnešiu, einančiu pirma jo.
1Sa 17:41 And the Philistine came on and drew near unto David; and the man that bare the shield went before him.
Ps 22:16 Gerklė išdžiūvusi lyg molio šukė, liežuvis limpa prie gomurio. Tu guldai mane į mirties dulkes.
Ps 22:16 For dogs have compassed me: the assembly of the wicked have inclosed me: they pierced my hands and my feet.
Rom 4:20 Jis nepasidavė netikėjimui Dievo pažadu, bet įsitvirtino tikėjime, teikdamas Dievui garbę
Ro 4:20 He staggered not at the promise of God through unbelief; but was strong in faith, giving glory to God;
Pat 12:11 Kas dirba savo žemę, tas turės duonos iki soties, o kas vaikosi vėjų, tas yra neprotingas.
Pr 12:11 He that tilleth his land shall be satisfied with bread: but he that followeth vain persons is void of understanding.
Pat 9:3 Ji išsiuntė savo tarnaites paskelbtimiesto aukštumose:
Pr 9:3 She hath sent forth her maidens: she crieth upon the highest places of the city,
2Sam 22:7 Savo skausme šaukiausi Viešpaties, šaukiausi savo Dievo. Jis išgirdo mano balsą savo šventykloje, jo ausis pasiekė mano šauksmas.
2Sa 22:7 In my distress I called upon the LORD, and cried to my God: and he did hear my voice out of his temple, and my cry did enter into his ears.
2Sam 19:40 O karalius nuėjo Gilgalo link, ir Kimhamas ėjo su juo. Visi Judo giminės kariai ir pusė Izraelio kariuomenės palydėjo karalių per upę.
2Sa 19:40 Then the king went on to Gilgal, and Chimham went on with him: and all the people of Judah conducted the king, and also half the people of Israel.
Jer 44:18 Bet nuo to laiko, kai liovėmės deginti smilkalus Dangaus karalienei ir aukoti jai liejamąsias atnašas, mums visko trūksta ir žūvame nuo kalavijo ir bado. "
Jer 44:18 But since we left off to burn incense to the queen of heaven, and to pour out drink offerings unto her, we have wanted all things, and have been consumed by the sword and by the famine.
Apd 16:33 Tą pačią nakties valandą jis pasiėmė juos su savimi, nuplovė jų žaizdas ir nedelsdamas kartu su visais savaisiais priėmė krikštą.
Ac 16:33 And he took them the same hour of the night, and washed their stripes; and was baptized, he and all his, straightway.

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