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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Ez 40:7 sarginių vienos nendrės ilgio ir vienos nendrės pločio su penkių uolekčių tarpu tarp sarginių ir vienos nendrės pločio slenkstis prie vidinio vartų prieangio.
Eze 40:7 And every little chamber was one reed long, and one reed broad; and between the little chambers were five cubits; and the threshold of the gate by the porch of the gate within was one reed.
Koh 2:1 Tariau širdyje: "Puiku! Leisiu sau mėgautis malonumais. Paragauk malonumų! " Bet, tikėk manimi, ir tai buvo migla.
Ec 2:1 I said in mine heart, Go to now, I will prove thee with mirth, therefore enjoy pleasure: and, behold, this also is vanity.
2Sam 2:30 O Joabas, nustojęs vytis Abnerą, surinko visus savo karius. Be Asaelio, iš Dovydo kareivių dar trūko devyniolikos vyrų.
2Sa 2:30 And Joab returned from following Abner: and when he had gathered all the people together, there lacked of David's servants nineteen men and Asahel.
Kun 4:12 visas jaučio liekanas ­ jis išneš į švarią vietą už stovyklos, kur išpilami pelenai, ir sudegins ant laužo. Toje vietoje, kur išpilami pelenai, viskas bus sudeginta.
Le 4:12 Even the whole bullock shall he carry forth without the camp unto a clean place, where the ashes are poured out, and burn him on the wood with fire: where the ashes are poured out shall he be burnt.
Ez 16:46 Tavo vyresnioji sesuo yra Samarija, gyvenusi su savo dukterimis į šiaurę nuo tavęs, o tavo jaunesnioji sesuo, gyvenusi į pietus nuo tavęs, yra Sodoma ir jos dukterys.
Eze 16:46 And thine elder sister is Samaria, she and her daughters that dwell at thy left hand: and thy younger sister, that dwelleth at thy right hand, is Sodom and her daughters.
1Krn 17:14 Aš amžinai įsodinsiu jį savo Namuose bei savo karalystėje, kad jo sostas būtų amžinai tvirtas. ’"
1Ch 17:14 But I will settle him in mine house and in my kingdom for ever: and his throne shall be established for evermore.
1Krn 9:9 jų giminaičių pagal šeimas ­ devyni šimtai penkiasdešimt šeši. Visi šie vyrai buvo savo kilčių galvos.
1Ch 9:9 And their brethren, according to their generations, nine hundred and fifty and six. All these men were chief of the fathers in the house of their fathers.
Mt 27:56 Tarp jų buvo Marija Magdalena, Jokūbo ir Juozapo motina Marija ir Zebediejaus sūnų motina.
Mat 27:56 Among which was Mary Magdalene, and Mary the mother of James and Joses, and the mother of Zebedees children.
Ps 119:75 Žinau, Viešpatie, kad teisūs tavo sprendimaiir kad dėl to mane nubaudei, jog esi ištikimas.
Ps 119:75 I know, O LORD, that thy judgments are right, and that thou in faithfulness hast afflicted me.
Ts 7:11 ir pasiklausyk, ką jie kalba. Po to turėsi drąsos užpulti stovyklą. " Tad jis nusileido su savo ginklanešiu Pura prie stovyklos sargybų.
Judg 7:11 And thou shalt hear what they say; and afterward shall thine hands be strengthened to go down unto the host. Then went he down with Phurah his servant unto the outside of the armed men that were in the host.
1Sam 22:8 Ar tai dėl to prieš mane susimokėte? Juk niekas man nepasako, kad mano sūnus susidėjo su Jesės sūnumi, nė vienas iš jūsų nesirūpina manimi ir nepasako, kad mano sūnus sukurstė mano tarną tykoti manęs iš pasalų, kaip šiandien jis ir daro. "
1Sa 22:8 That all of you have conspired against me, and there is none that sheweth me that my son hath made a league with the son of Jesse, and there is none of you that is sorry for me, or sheweth unto me that my son hath stirred up my servant against me, to lie in wait, as at this day?
Koh 5:10 Pinigus mėgstantis niekada nepasisotina pinigais, nė turtus mėgstantis ­ pelnu. Tai irgi migla!
Ec 5:10 He that loveth silver shall not be satisfied with silver; nor he that loveth abundance with increase: this is also vanity.
Iz 36:13 Paskui rab šakė žengė priekin ir sušuko garsiu balsu judėjiškai: "Klausykitės didžiojo karaliaus, Asirijos karaliaus, žodžių!
Isa 36:13 Then Rabshakeh stood, and cried with a loud voice in the Jews' language, and said, Hear ye the words of the great king, the king of Assyria.
Įst 9:17 Paėmęs abi plokštes, sviedžiau jas abiem rankomis nuo savęs ir sudaužiau jūsų akyse.
De 9:17 And I took the two tables, and cast them out of my two hands, and brake them before your eyes.
1Tim 4:10 mes todėl ir triūsiame bei kovojame, kad pasitikime gyvuoju Dievu, kuris yra visų žmonių, o ypač tikinčiųjų, Gelbėtojas.
1Ti 4:10 For therefore we both labour and suffer reproach, because we trust in the living God, who is the Saviour of all men, specially of those that believe.
Iz 60:9 Tai laivai plaukia pas mane, Taršišo didlaiviai priekyje, pargabendami tavo sūnus iš tolidrauge su jų auksu ir sidabrudėl Viešpaties, tavo Dievo, ir Izraelio Šventojo, kuris tave išaukštino.
Isa 60:9 Surely the isles shall wait for me, and the ships of Tarshish first, to bring thy sons from far, their silver and their gold with them, unto the name of the LORD thy God, and to the Holy One of Israel, because he hath glorified thee.
Ts 14:20 O Samsono nuotaka buvo atiduota jo palydovui, buvusiam jo pajauniu.
Judg 14:20 But Samson's wife was given to his companion, whom he had used as his friend.
Iz 47:11 Užguls tave vargas, ir nemokėsi jo šalin nužavėti; užpuls tave nelaimė, ir nepajėgsi jos nuvyti. Staiga užklups tave galas, apie kurį nepagalvojai.
Isa 47:11 Therefore shall evil come upon thee; thou shalt not know from whence it riseth: and mischief shall fall upon thee; thou shalt not be able to put it off: and desolation shall come upon thee suddenly, which thou shalt not know.
Iš 21:14 Bet jei kas nors apgalvotai užpultų ir klastingai kitą užmuštų, paimsi jį net nuo mano aukuro nubausti mirtimi.
Ex 21:14 But if a man come presumptuously upon his neighbour, to slay him with guile; thou shalt take him from mine altar, that he may die.
Job 41:1 Argi gali pagauti meškere Leviataną, ar surišti jo nasrus virve?
Job 41:1 Canst thou draw out leviathan with an hook? or his tongue with a cord which thou lettest down?

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