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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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1Krn 11:5 Jebuso gyventojai sakė Dovydui: "Čia tu niekada neįžengsi! " Bet Dovydas paėmė Siono tvirtovę. Šiandien tai Dovydo miestas.
1Ch 11:5 And the inhabitants of Jebus said to David, Thou shalt not come hither. Nevertheless David took the castle of Zion, which is the city of David.
Iz 31:3 Egiptiečiai ­ žmonės, o ne Dievas, jų žirgai ­ kūnas, o ne dvasia. Viešpats tik išties savo ranką, ir gynėjas parpuls, o drauge su juo kris jo ginamasis; juodu abu kartu pražus.
Isa 31:3 Now the Egyptians are men, and not God; and their horses flesh, and not spirit. When the LORD shall stretch out his hand, both he that helpeth shall fall, and he that is holpen shall fall down, and they all shall fail together.
Jn 13:29 Kadangi Judo žinioje buvo kasa, kai kurie pamanė, jog Jėzus jam įsakęs: "Nupirk, ko mums reikia šventėms" ar liepęs ką duoti vargšams.
Jo 13:29 For some of them thought, because Judas had the bag, that Jesus had said unto him, Buy those things that we have need of against the feast; or, that he should give something to the poor.
1Krn 24:25 Michėjo brolis ­ Išija; iš Išijos sūnų ­ Zacharijas.
1Ch 24:25 The brother of Michah was Isshiah: of the sons of Isshiah; Zechariah.
Job 17:10 Tad eikite šen, jūs visi, vėl pulkite mane. Išmintingo žmogaus tarp jūsų nerasiu nė vieno!
Job 17:10 But as for you all, do ye return, and come now: for I cannot find one wise man among you.
Įst 28:31 Tavo jautis tau matant bus papjautas, bet tu jo nevalgysi; tavo asilas tau matant bus pavogtas, bet nebus tau sugrąžintas; tavo avys bus atiduotos tavo priešams, ir nebus kas tau pagelbėtų.
De 28:31 Thine ox shall be slain before thine eyes, and thou shalt not eat thereof: thine ass shall be violently taken away from before thy face, and shall not be restored to thee: thy sheep shall be given unto thine enemies, and thou shalt have none to rescue them.
Jer 16:6 Didžiūnai ir varguoliai mirs šiame krašte be laidotuvių ir be raudų. Niekas dėl jų nei draskysis iki kraujo, nei galvą skusis.
Jer 16:6 Both the great and the small shall die in this land: they shall not be buried, neither shall men lament for them, nor cut themselves, nor make themselves bald for them:
Joz 4:18 Kunigams, nešusiems Viešpaties Sandoros Skrynią, išbridus iš Jordano vagos ir jų kojoms pasiekus sausumą, Jordano vandenys sugrįžo į savo vietą, tekėdami kaip anksčiau visa vaga.
Jos 4:18 And it came to pass, when the priests that bare the ark of the covenant of the LORD were come up out of the midst of Jordan, and the soles of the priests' feet were lifted up unto the dry land, that the waters of Jordan returned unto their place, and flowed over all his banks, as they did before.
1Sam 11:11 Kitą dieną Saulius išdėstė kariuomenę trim būriais. Rytmečio sargybos metu jie įsiveržė į stovyklą ir tol kirto amonitus, kol įkaito diena. Išlikę gyvi buvo taip išblaškyti, kad niekur neliko dviejų vienoje vietoje.
1Sa 11:11 And it was so on the morrow, that Saul put the people in three companies; and they came into the midst of the host in the morning watch, and slew the Ammonites until the heat of the day: and it came to pass, that they which remained were scattered, so that two of them were not left together.
Ps 86:15 Bet tu, Viešpatie, esi gailestingas ir malonus Dievas, visada kantrus, visada geras ir ištikimas.
Ps 86:15 But thou, O Lord, art a God full of compassion, and gracious, long suffering, and plenteous in mercy and truth.
Iz 24:23 Tada mėnulis paraus, saulė susigės, nes Galybių Viešpatsant Siono kalno ir Jeruzalėje viešpatausšlovingas tarp savo seniūnų.
Isa 24:23 Then the moon shall be confounded, and the sun ashamed, when the LORD of hosts shall reign in mount Zion, and in Jerusalem, and before his ancients gloriously.
Koh 3:7 Laikas perplėšti ir laikas susiūti, laikas tylėti ir laikas kalbėti.
Ec 3:7 A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
Job 2:5 Bet ištiesk ranką, paliesk jo kaulus bei kūną, ir jis tikrai iškeiks tave į akis. "
Job 2:5 But put forth thine hand now, and touch his bone and his flesh, and he will curse thee to thy face.
1Kar 21:5 Jo žmona Jezabelė atėjo pas jį ir klausė: "Kodėl tu toks prislėgtas, kad net valgyti nenori? "
1Ki 21:5 But Jezebel his wife came to him, and said unto him, Why is thy spirit so sad, that thou eatest no bread?
Jer 30:1 Viešpaties pažadas tautai Jeremiją pasiekė Viešpaties žodis:
Jer 30:1 The word that came to Jeremiah from the LORD, saying,
Iš 31:4 gaminti dirbinius iš aukso, sidabro bei vario,
Ex 31:4 To devise cunning works, to work in gold, and in silver, and in brass,
Joz 13:19 Kirjataimais, Sibma, Ceret Šaharu ant kalvos slėnyje,
Jos 13:19 And Kirjathaim, and Sibmah, and Zarethshahar in the mount of the valley,
Sk 31:5 Taigi iš Izraelio tūkstančių buvo pašaukti į karo tarnybą po tūkstantį iš kiekvienos giminės ­ dvylika tūkstančių, ginkluotų mūšiui.
Nu 31:5 So there were delivered out of the thousands of Israel, a thousand of every tribe, twelve thousand armed for war.
1Kar 7:23 Tada buvo nuliedinta jūra . Ji buvo apskrita, dešimt uolekčių nuo vieno briaunos krašto iki kito ir penkių uolekčių aukščio. Trisdešimt uolekčių virvė buvo jos mastas aplink briauną.
1Ki 7:23 And he made a molten sea, ten cubits from the one brim to the other: it was round all about, and his height was five cubits: and a line of thirty cubits did compass it round about.
Pat 15:3 Dievo akys yra visur, jos stebi blogus ir gerus žmones.
Pr 15:3 The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.

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