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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Neh 13:31 Be to, patvarkiau malkų atnašą aukurui nustatytu laiku ir pirmienas. Atsimink tai mano labui, o mano Dieve!
Ne 13:31 And for the wood offering, at times appointed, and for the firstfruits. Remember me, O my God, for good.
Joz 12:22 Kedešo karalius ­ vienas, Jokneamo Karmelyje karalius ­ vienas,
Jos 12:22 The king of Kedesh, one; the king of Jokneam of Carmel, one;
2Kar 21:20 Jis darė, kas nedora Viešpaties akyse, kaip buvo daręs jo tėvas Manasas.
2Ki 21:20 And he did that which was evil in the sight of the LORD, as his father Manasseh did.
Job 9:27 Jei sakau: ‘Užmiršiu savo skundą, atsikratysiu liūdno veidoir būsiu linksmas’, ­
Job 9:27 If I say, I will forget my complaint, I will leave off my heaviness, and comfort myself:
1Krn 2:7 Zimrio sūnus ­ Karmis. Karmio sūnus ­ Acharas; jis nusižengė, pasiimdamas sunaikinti skirtus daiktus, todėl užtraukė nelaimę Izraeliui.
1Ch 2:7 And the sons of Carmi; Achar, the troubler of Israel, who transgressed in the thing accursed.
1Krn 6:16 Levio sūnūs: Geršomas, Kehatas ir Meraris.
1Ch 6:16 The sons of Levi; Gershom, Kohath, and Merari.
Kol 4:17 Taip pat pasakykite Archipui: "Žiūrėk, kad vykdytum tarnystę, kurią gavai Viešpatyje! "
Co 4:17 And say to Archippus, Take heed to the ministry which thou hast received in the Lord, that thou fulfil it.
Ps 107:43 Išmintingas žmogus pastebės šiuos dalykus, ir mąstys apie Viešpaties ištikimąją meilę.
Ps 107:43 Whoso is wise, and will observe these things, even they shall understand the lovingkindness of the LORD.
Pr 29:24 Savo tarnaitę Zilpą Labanas paskyrė dukters Lėjos tarnaite.
Ge 29:24 And Laban gave unto his daughter Leah Zilpah his maid for an handmaid.
Jer 34:3 Ir tu pats neišvengsi jo rankos. Tikrai būsi pagautas ir atiduotas į jo nagus. Akis į akį su juo susitiksi, veidas į veidą su juo kalbėsiesi. Paskui būsi išvestas į Babiloną.
Jer 34:3 And thou shalt not escape out of his hand, but shalt surely be taken, and delivered into his hand; and thine eyes shall behold the eyes of the king of Babylon, and he shall speak with thee mouth to mouth, and thou shalt go to Babylon.
Iz 33:1 Vargas tau, niokotojau, kad pats nebuvai nuniokotas, tau, klastingasis išdavike, kad pats netapai klastos auka! Kai baigsi niokoti, pats būsi nuniokotas, kai pailsi klastauti, pats tapsi klastos auka.
Isa 33:1 Woe to thee that spoilest, and thou wast not spoiled; and dealest treacherously, and they dealt not treacherously with thee! when thou shalt cease to spoil, thou shalt be spoiled; and when thou shalt make an end to deal treacherously, they shall deal treacherously with thee.
1Kor 15:14 O jei Kristus nebuvo prikeltas, tai tuščias mūsų skelbimas ir tuščias jūsų tikėjimas.
1C 15:14 And if Christ be not risen, then is our preaching vain, and your faith is also vain.
1Sam 1:20 Ona tapo nėščia ir, atėjus metui, pagimdė sūnų. Ji pavadino jį Samueliu, nes sakė: "Aš Viešpaties jo prašiau. "
1Sa 1:20 Wherefore it came to pass, when the time was come about after Hannah had conceived, that she bare a son, and called his name Samuel, saying, Because I have asked him of the LORD.
1Krn 12:39 Tenai jie pasiliko su Dovydu tris dienas valgydami ir gerdami, nes giminės buvo juos aprūpinę.
1Ch 12:39 And there they were with David three days, eating and drinking: for their brethren had prepared for them.
1Tes 4:3 Tokia gi Dievo valia ­ jūsų šventėjimas. Susilaikykite nuo svetimavimo!
1Th 4:3 For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication:
Įst 7:14 Tu būsi palaimintas labiau negu visos kitos tautos: nebus nei bevaisio, nei bevaisės tarp jūsų ar tarp jūsų galvijų.
De 7:14 Thou shalt be blessed above all people: there shall not be male or female barren among you, or among your cattle.
Kun 14:30 Tada jis atnašaus vieną iš purplelių ar balandžių ­ ką žmogus išgali,
Le 14:30 And he shall offer the one of the turtledoves, or of the young pigeons, such as he can get;
1Tim 6:15 Jį skirtu laiku apreikšpalaimintasis, vienintelis Valdovas, karalių Karalius ir viešpačių Viešpats,
1Ti 6:15 Which in his times he shall shew, who is the blessed and only Potentate, the King of kings, and Lord of lords;
2Sam 8:11 Ir juos karalius Dovydas pašventė Viešpačiui drauge su sidabru ir auksu, paimtais iš visų pavergtų tautų:
2Sa 8:11 Which also king David did dedicate unto the LORD, with the silver and gold that he had dedicated of all nations which he subdued;
Ezd 8:22 Mat gėdijausi prašyti karaliaus karių ar raitelių apsaugos kelyje nuo priešų, kadangi buvome sakę karaliui, kad mūsų Dievo ranka gera visiems, kurie jo ieško, bet jo galybė ir rūstybė prieš visus, kurie jį palieka.
Ezr 8:22 For I was ashamed to require of the king a band of soldiers and horsemen to help us against the enemy in the way: because we had spoken unto the king, saying, The hand of our God is upon all them for good that seek him; but his power and his wrath is against all them that forsake him.

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