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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Iz 23:12 Ir tarė jis: "Nebedžiūgausi daugiau, mergele, Sidono dukterie; tu patekai priespaudon. Nors pakiltum ir nukeliautum į Kitimų kraštą, ramybės ir ten tau nebus.
Isa 23:12 And he said, Thou shalt no more rejoice, O thou oppressed virgin, daughter of Zidon: arise, pass over to Chittim; there also shalt thou have no rest.
1Tes 4:3 Tokia gi Dievo valia ­ jūsų šventėjimas. Susilaikykite nuo svetimavimo!
1Th 4:3 For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication:
1Sam 19:13 Tada Mikalė, paėmusi namų stabą, paguldė jį lovoje, padėjo prie galvos ožkų vilnos pagalvę ir apklojo drabužiais.
1Sa 19:13 And Michal took an image, and laid it in the bed, and put a pillow of goats' hair for his bolster, and covered it with a cloth.
Job 36:4 Iš tikrųjų mano žodžiai ­ ne melas; prieš save matote žmogų, kuris tikrai žino.
Job 36:4 For truly my words shall not be false: he that is perfect in knowledge is with thee.
Ps 119:36 Palenk mano širdį į savo įsakus, o ne į savanaudį pelną.
Ps 119:36 Incline my heart unto thy testimonies, and not to covetousness.
2Krn 28:12 Be to, ir kai kurie Efraimo žmonių galvos ­ Johanano sūnus Azarijas, Mešilemoto sūnus Berechijas, Šalumo sūnus Jehizkijas bei Hadlajo sūnus Amasa ­ pakilo prieš grįžtančius iš žygio
2Ch 28:12 Then certain of the heads of the children of Ephraim, Azariah the son of Johanan, Berechiah the son of Meshillemoth, and Jehizkiah the son of Shallum, and Amasa the son of Hadlai, stood up against them that came from the war,
Ez 47:3 Eidamas rytų kryptimi su virve rankoje, vyras atmatavo tūkstantį uolekčių ir pervedė mane per vandenį; vandens buvo ligi kulkšnių.
Eze 47:3 And when the man that had the line in his hand went forth eastward, he measured a thousand cubits, and he brought me through the waters; the waters were to the ankles.
Kun 7:29 "Kalbėk izraelitams ir sakyk: atnašą, skirtą Viešpačiui iš bendravimo aukos, turės atnešti Viešpačiui žmogus, kuris atnašauja bendravimo auką.
Le 7:29 Speak unto the children of Israel, saying, He that offereth the sacrifice of his peace offerings unto the LORD shall bring his oblation unto the LORD of the sacrifice of his peace offerings.
Ez 20:32 Niekada neįvyks tai, kas ateina jums galvon, kai sakote: ‘Būsime kaip tautos, kaip kitų kraštų gentys, garbindami medį ir akmenį. ’
Eze 20:32 And that which cometh into your mind shall not be at all, that ye say, We will be as the heathen, as the families of the countries, to serve wood and stone.
Jer 15:10 Vargas man, motina mano, kad pagimdei mane ­žmogų, kuris kaltina ir teisia visą kraštą! Aš nei kam skolinau, nei esu kam skolingas, tačiau visi mane keikia.
Jer 15:10 Woe is me, my mother, that thou hast borne me a man of strife and a man of contention to the whole earth! I have neither lent on usury, nor men have lent to me on usury; yet every one of them doth curse me.
Ez 13:5 Jūs nei lipote į spragas, nei taisėte sienas aplink Izraelio namus, kad Viešpaties dieną jie tvirtai laikytųsi kovoje.
Eze 13:5 Ye have not gone up into the gaps, neither made up the hedge for the house of Israel to stand in the battle in the day of the LORD.
Oz 4:12 Mano tauta atsiklausia rąstigalio, burtų lazda jiems išburia. Kekšystės dvasia juos nuvedė į klystkelius; palikdami savo Dievą, jie elgiasi kaip kekšės.
Ho 4:12 My people ask counsel at their stocks, and their staff declareth unto them: for the spirit of whoredoms hath caused them to err, and they have gone a whoring from under their God.
Ps 24:10 Kas gi tas Garbės karalius? Galybių Viešpats ­jis tas Garbės karalius! Sela.
Ps 24:10 Who is this King of glory? The LORD of hosts, he is the King of glory. Selah.
Ez 7:14 Jie papūtė ragą, ir viskas parengta, bet nėra kam eiti į mūšį, nes mano degantis pyktis apima juos visus.
Eze 7:14 They have blown the trumpet, even to make all ready; but none goeth to the battle: for my wrath is upon all the multitude thereof.
Sk 29:6 Tai turi būti atnašaujama, neskaitant jaunaties deginamosios aukos ir jos javų atnašos, nuolatinės deginamosios aukos ir jos atnašos, kiekviena jų su savo liejamąja atnaša pagal įsaką kaip malonaus kvapo ugninė atnaša Viešpačiui.
Nu 29:6 Beside the burnt offering of the month, and his meat offering, and the daily burnt offering, and his meat offering, and their drink offerings, according unto their manner, for a sweet savour, a sacrifice made by fire unto the LORD.
Įst 7:16 Nerodydamas gailesčio, sunaikinsi visas tautas, kurias Viešpats, tavo Dievas, tau atiduoda. Kitiems dievams netarnausi, nes tau tai būtų žabangos.
De 7:16 And thou shalt consume all the people which the LORD thy God shall deliver thee; thine eye shall have no pity upon them: neither shalt thou serve their gods; for that will be a snare unto thee.
Įst 5:18 Nesvetimausi.
De 5:18 Neither shalt thou commit adultery.
2Sam 18:23 "Trūks plyš, ­ užsispyrusiai tvirtino jis, ­ aš bėgsiu. " "Tai bėk! " ­ tarė Joabas. Tada Ahimaacas nubėgo Lygumos keliu ir aplenkė kušitą.
2Sa 18:23 But howsoever, said he, let me run. And he said unto him, Run. Then Ahimaaz ran by the way of the plain, and overran Cushi.
2Krn 24:6 Tad karalius pasišaukė vadą Jehojadą ir tarė jam: "Kodėl nereikalavai, kad levitai parneštų iš Judo ir Jeruzalės Mozės, Viešpaties tarno, Izraelio bendrijai uždėtą Sandoros Palapinės mokestį? "
2Ch 24:6 And the king called for Jehoiada the chief, and said unto him, Why hast thou not required of the Levites to bring in out of Judah and out of Jerusalem the collection, according to the commandment of Moses the servant of the LORD, and of the congregation of Israel, for the tabernacle of witness?
2Sam 3:34 Tavo rankos nebuvo surištos, tavo kojos nebuvo supančiotos. Tu kritai, kaip krinta nedorėlių nužudytas. "Visi žmonės jo dar labiau verkė.
2Sa 3:34 Thy hands were not bound, nor thy feet put into fetters: as a man falleth before wicked men, so fellest thou. And all the people wept again over him.

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