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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Kun 19:9 Kai pjaunate savo krašto derlių, nepjausi iki pat savo lauko pakraščių nei rinksi likusias derliaus varpas.
Le 19:9 And when ye reap the harvest of your land, thou shalt not wholly reap the corners of thy field, neither shalt thou gather the gleanings of thy harvest.
Mk 2:20 Bet ateis dienos, kai jaunikis bus iš jų atimtas, ir tada, tą dieną, jie pasninkaus.
Mar 2:20 But the days will come, when the bridegroom shall be taken away from them, and then shall they fast in those days.
Pat 22:19 Kad pasitikėtum Viešpačiu, šiandien tau juos paaiškinsiu.
Pr 22:19 That thy trust may be in the LORD, I have made known to thee this day, even to thee.
2Krn 9:10 Be to, Hiramo tarnai ir Saliamono tarnai, kurie pargabeno aukso iš Ofyro, pargabeno taip pat algumo medžio ir brangakmenių.
2Ch 9:10 And the servants also of Huram, and the servants of Solomon, which brought gold from Ophir, brought algum trees and precious stones.
2Sam 7:25 Tad dabar, Viešpatie Dieve, vykdyk per amžius žodį, kurį apreiškei apie savo tarną bei jo namus, ir padaryk, kaip pažadėjai.
2Sa 7:25 And now, O LORD God, the word that thou hast spoken concerning thy servant, and concerning his house, establish it for ever, and do as thou hast said.
2Kar 1:11 Karalius pasiuntė pas jį kitą penkiasdešimtininką su penkiasdešimtine vyrų. Užkopęs pas jį, tas kreipėsi: "O Dievo vyre, taip kalbėjo karalius: ‘Tuojau pat nulipk! ’"
2Ki 1:11 Again also he sent unto him another captain of fifty with his fifty. And he answered and said unto him, O man of God, thus hath the king said, Come down quickly.
Įst 4:32 Dabar prašyčiau pasiklausti apie praeities amžius, seniai prieš tave praėjusius, nuo tos dienos, kai Dievas sukūrė žmones žemėje, pasiteirauti nuo vieno dangaus krašto iki kito, ar įvyko kada nors toks didingas įvykis, kaip šis, ar kada nors kas nors panašaus buvo girdėta?
De 4:32 For ask now of the days that are past, which were before thee, since the day that God created man upon the earth, and ask from the one side of heaven unto the other, whether there hath been any such thing as this great thing is, or hath been heard like it?
1Krn 6:32 Kol Saliamonas statė Viešpaties Namus Jeruzalėje, jie tarnavo giesmėmis priešais Padangtę Susitikimo Palapinėje, atlikdami savo pareigas, kaip buvo jiems nustatyta.
1Ch 6:32 And they ministered before the dwelling place of the tabernacle of the congregation with singing, until Solomon had built the house of the LORD in Jerusalem: and then they waited on their office according to their order.
2Sam 13:1 Amnonas ir Tamara Praėjo šiek tiek laiko. Dovydo sūnus Abšalomas turėjo gražią seserį, vardu Tamara. Dovydo sūnus Amnonas ją aklai įsimylėjo.
2Sa 13:1 And it came to pass after this, that Absalom the son of David had a fair sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the son of David loved her.
Gal 2:1 Paskui, po keturiolikos metų, vėl nuvykau į Jeruzalę kartu su Barnabu, pasiėmęs ir Titą.
Ga 2:1 Then fourteen years after I went up again to Jerusalem with Barnabas, and took Titus with me also.
Job 39:26 Argi iš tavęs išmoko sakalas skraidytiir išskleisti sparnus pietų link?
Job 39:26 Doth the hawk fly by thy wisdom, and stretch her wings toward the south?
Įst 33:11 Laimink, Viešpatie, jo nuosavybęir maloniai priimk jo rankų tarnybą. Taip smok į strėnas jo priešams, nekenčiantiems jo, kad jie daugiau nebeatsikeltų. "
De 33:11 Bless, LORD, his substance, and accept the work of his hands; smite through the loins of them that rise against him, and of them that hate him, that they rise not again.
Apr 12:9 Taip buvo išmestas didysis slibinas, senoji gyvatė, vadinamas velniu ir šėtonu, kuris suvedžiodavo visą pasaulį. Jis buvo išmestas žemėn, ir kartu su juo buvo išmesti jo angelai.
Re 12:9 And the great dragon was cast out, that old serpent, called the Devil, and Satan, which deceiveth the whole world: he was cast out into the earth, and his angels were cast out with him.
Iš 37:19 Trys migdolo žiedo pavidalo taurelės, kiekviena su galvute ir vainiklapiais ant vienos šakos, ir trys migdolo žiedo pavidalo taurelės, kiekviena su galvute ir vainiklapiais, ant kitos šakos. Tokios buvo visos šešios iš žvakidės išeinančios šakos.
Ex 37:19 Three bowls made after the fashion of almonds in one branch, a knop and a flower; and three bowls made like almonds in another branch, a knop and a flower: so throughout the six branches going out of the candlestick.
Kun 8:26 Iš neraugintos duonos pintinės, buvusios Viešpaties akivaizdoje, jis paėmė vieną neraugintos duonos paplotį, vieną duonos su aliejumi paplotį bei vieną bandelę ir padėjo juos ant taukų bei dešiniosios mentės.
Le 8:26 And out of the basket of unleavened bread, that was before the LORD, he took one unleavened cake, and a cake of oiled bread, and one wafer, and put them on the fat, and upon the right shoulder:
Pr 14:10 O Sidimų slėnis buvo pilnas bitumo duobių. Sodomos ir Gomoros karaliai bėgdami įkrito į jas, o likusieji pabėgo į kalnus.
Ge 14:10 And the vale of Siddim was full of slimepits; and the kings of Sodom and Gomorrah fled, and fell there; and they that remained fled to the mountain.
Jer 18:13 Todėl taip kalba Viešpats: "Klauskite tautų, ar kuri yra ką panašaus girdėjusi. Tikrai pasibaisėtinai pasielgėmergelė, Izraelio tauta!
Jer 18:13 Therefore thus saith the LORD; Ask ye now among the heathen, who hath heard such things: the virgin of Israel hath done a very horrible thing.
Rom 5:13 Nuodėmė buvo pasaulyje ir iki įstatymo, bet, nesant įstatymo, nuodėmė negalėjo būti įskaitoma.
Ro 5:13 (For until the law sin was in the world: but sin is not imputed when there is no law.
Joz 13:2 Štai žemė, kuri dar nepaveldėta: visos filistinų ir gešūriečių sritys,
Jos 13:2 This is the land that yet remaineth: all the borders of the Philistines, and all Geshuri,
Mt 25:2 Penkios iš jų buvo paikos ir penkios protingos.
Mat 25:2 And five of them were wise, and five were foolish.

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