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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Sk 16:17 Paimkite kiekvienas savo smilkytuvą, įberkite į jį smilkalų, ir kiekvienas teatnašauja savo smilkytuvą Viešpaties akivaizdoje, du šimtus penkiasdešimt smilkytuvų, ir tu, ir Aaronas, kiekvienas su savo smilkytuvu. "
Nu 16:17 And take every man his censer, and put incense in them, and bring ye before the LORD every man his censer, two hundred and fifty censers; thou also, and Aaron, each of you his censer.
2Krn 18:15 Bet karalius tarė jam: "Kiek kartų turiu tave prisaikdinti, kad sakytum man vien tiesą, Viešpaties vardu? "
2Ch 18:15 And the king said to him, How many times shall I adjure thee that thou say nothing but the truth to me in the name of the LORD?
Jer 9:19 Iš Siono girdėti rauda: ‘Kaip baisiai mes nuniokoti! Kokia mums gėda! Palikome kraštą, nes nugriautos mūsų sodybos! ’
Jer 9:19 For a voice of wailing is heard out of Zion, How are we spoiled! we are greatly confounded, because we have forsaken the land, because our dwellings have cast us out.
Įst 21:3 Tada arčiausiai lavono esančio miesto seniūnai paims iš bandos telyčią, kuri dar nėra buvusi pajungta darbui ir jungo niekada netraukė.
De 21:3 And it shall be, that the city which is next unto the slain man, even the elders of that city shall take an heifer, which hath not been wrought with, and which hath not drawn in the yoke;
Iš 25:31 Padarysi iš gryno aukso žvakidę. Žvakidės stovas ir kotas turės būti nukalti; taurelės, galvutės ir vainiklapiai turės būti iš vieno gabalo su žvakide.
Ex 25:31 And thou shalt make a candlestick of pure gold: of beaten work shall the candlestick be made: his shaft, and his branches, his bowls, his knops, and his flowers, shall be of the same.
1Krn 8:33 Nerui gimė Kišas, Kišui ­ Saulius, Sauliui ­ Jehonatanas, Malkišūva, Abinadabas ir Ešbaalas.
1Ch 8:33 And Ner begat Kish, and Kish begat Saul, and Saul begat Jonathan, and Malchishua, and Abinadab, and Eshbaal.
Zch 3:6 Tuomet Viešpaties angelas patikino Jozuę, sakydamas:
Zec 3:6 And the angel of the LORD protested unto Joshua, saying,
1Krn 19:15 Matydami, kad aramėjai bėga, amonitai irgi bėgo nuo Joabo brolio Abšajo, traukdamiesi į miestą. Tada Joabas sugrįžo į Jeruzalę.
1Ch 19:15 And when the children of Ammon saw that the Syrians were fled, they likewise fled before Abishai his brother, and entered into the city. Then Joab came to Jerusalem.
Jn 11:53 Nuo tos dienos jie buvo tvirtai pasiryžę jį nužudyti.
Jo 11:53 Then from that day forth they took counsel together for to put him to death.
Iš 21:14 Bet jei kas nors apgalvotai užpultų ir klastingai kitą užmuštų, paimsi jį net nuo mano aukuro nubausti mirtimi.
Ex 21:14 But if a man come presumptuously upon his neighbour, to slay him with guile; thou shalt take him from mine altar, that he may die.
Jon 1:12 Jis atsakė jiems: "Imkite mane ir meskite į jūrą, kad jūra nurimtų. Žinau, kad per mane jus užklupo ši baisi audra. "
Jon 1:12 And he said unto them, Take me up, and cast me forth into the sea; so shall the sea be calm unto you: for I know that for my sake this great tempest is upon you.
Pr 49:9 Judas tarsi jaunas liūtas; nuo grobio pakilai, mano sūnau! Jis priglunda, atsigula tarsi liūtas, tarsi žvėrių karalius; kas gi galėtų drįsti jį prikelti?
Ge 49:9 Judah is a lion's whelp: from the prey, my son, thou art gone up: he stooped down, he couched as a lion, and as an old lion; who shall rouse him up?
Ps 149:9 vykdydami teismo sprendimą. Tai garbė Dievo tautai! Šlovinkite Viešpatį!
Ps 149:9 To execute upon them the judgment written: this honour have all his saints. Praise ye the LORD.
Mt 6:11 Kasdienės mūsų duonos duok mums šiandien
Mat 6:11 Give us this day our daily bread.
Ps 108:10 Kas atves mane į sutvirtintą miestą? Kas ves mane į Edomą?
Ps 108:10 Who will bring me into the strong city? who will lead me into Edom?
Mk 8:5 Jėzus paklausė: "Kiek duonos kepalėlių turite? " Jie atsakė: "Septynis. "
Mar 8:5 And he asked them, How many loaves have ye? And they said, Seven.
Sk 18:18 o jų mėsa priklausys tau, lygiai kaip tavo yra siūbuojamosios atnašos krūtinė ir dešinioji koja.
Nu 18:18 And the flesh of them shall be thine, as the wave breast and as the right shoulder are thine.
Jn 19:41 Toje vietoje, kur buvo nukryžiuotas Jėzus, buvo sodas ir sode naujas kapo rūsys, kuriame dar niekas nebuvo laidotas.
Jo 19:41 Now in the place where he was crucified there was a garden; and in the garden a new sepulchre, wherein was never man yet laid.
Jer 32:5 Zedekijas bus išvarytas į Babiloną. Ten jis liks, kol aš juo pasirūpinsiu, ­ tai Viešpaties žodis. ­ Kovodami su chaldėjais, jūs negalite laimėti’! "
Jer 32:5 And he shall lead Zedekiah to Babylon, and there shall he be until I visit him, saith the LORD: though ye fight with the Chaldeans, ye shall not prosper.
Pr 7:2 Pasiimk po septynias poras visų švariųjų gyvulių, patinus ir pateles, o visų nešvariųjų gyvulių ­ po vieną porą, patiną ir patelę,
Ge 7:2 Of every clean beast thou shalt take to thee by sevens, the male and his female: and of beasts that are not clean by two, the male and his female.

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