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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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1Sam 5:12 Vyrai, išvengę mirties, buvo ištikti skaudulių. Miesto dejonės kilo iki pat dangaus.
1Sa 5:12 And the men that died not were smitten with the emerods: and the cry of the city went up to heaven.
Ts 10:3 Po jo atėjo Jayras Gileadietis ir dvidešimt dvejus metus išbuvo teisėju Izraelyje.
Judg 10:3 And after him arose Jair, a Gileadite, and judged Israel twenty and two years.
Ts 15:2 "Aš buvau tikras, kad tu jos iš tikrųjų neapkenti, ­ sakė jos tėvas, ­ todėl atidaviau ją tavo vestuvių pajauniui. Argi jos jaunesnioji sesuo ne gražesnė už ją? Prašau ją imti vietoj anos. "
Judg 15:2 And her father said, I verily thought that thou hadst utterly hated her; therefore I gave her to thy companion: is not her younger sister fairer than she? take her, I pray thee, instead of her.
Koh 3:8 Laikas mylėti ir laikas nekęsti, laikas karui ir laikas taikai.
Ec 3:8 A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
Įst 6:16 Negundykite Viešpaties, savo Dievo, kaip gundėte prie Masos.
De 6:16 Ye shall not tempt the LORD your God, as ye tempted him in Massah.
Jer 33:25 Taip kalba Viešpats: "Tik jei neturėčiau sandoros su diena ir naktimi, tik jei nebūčiau davęs įstatų dangui ir žemei,
Jer 33:25 Thus saith the LORD; If my covenant be not with day and night, and if I have not appointed the ordinances of heaven and earth;
Oz 1:4 Viešpats tarė jam: "Pavadink jį vardu Jezreelis, nes netrukus nubausiu Jehuvo namus už Jezreelyje pralietą kraują ir padarysiu galą Izraelio namų karalystei.
Ho 1:4 And the LORD said unto him, Call his name Jezreel; for yet a little while, and I will avenge the blood of Jezreel upon the house of Jehu, and will cause to cease the kingdom of the house of Israel.
Mch 5:2 O iš tavęs, Efratos Betliejau, mažiausias tarp Judo kaimų, man kils tas, kuris valdys Izraelį. Jo kilmė siekia tolimą senovę, seniai praėjusius laikus.
Mic 5:2 But thou, Bethlehem Ephratah, though thou be little among the thousands of Judah, yet out of thee shall he come forth unto me that is to be ruler in Israel; whose goings forth have been from of old, from everlasting.
Job 38:7 kai drauge giedojo rytmetinės žvaigždėsir visos dangiškosios būtybės šaukė iš džiaugsmo?
Job 38:7 When the morning stars sang together, and all the sons of God shouted for joy?
Ts 19:14 Taigi jie ėjo toliau savo keliu, o saulė nusileido jiems atėjus netoli Gibėjos Benjamino žemėje.
Judg 19:14 And they passed on and went their way; and the sun went down upon them when they were by Gibeah, which belongeth to Benjamin.
Job 39:24 Virpėdamas iš nekantrumo, jis šuoliuoja; išgirdęs rago gausmą, nustovėti negali.
Job 39:24 He swalloweth the ground with fierceness and rage: neither believeth he that it is the sound of the trumpet.
Mk 8:9 O buvo apie keturis tūkstančius žmonių. Jis atleido juos
Mar 8:9 And they that had eaten were about four thousand: and he sent them away.
Įst 21:8 Atleisk, Viešpatie, savo tautai Izraeliui, kurį atpirkai. Tenepasilieka nekalto kraujo kaltė Izraelyje, tavo tautoje! ’ Ir kraujo kaltė bus jiems atleista.
De 21:8 Be merciful, O LORD, unto thy people Israel, whom thou hast redeemed, and lay not innocent blood unto thy people of Israel's charge. And the blood shall be forgiven them.
1Kar 1:13 Tučtuojau eik pas karalių Dovydą ir sakyk: ‘Mano viešpatie karaliau, argi neprisiekei savo tarnaitei, tardamas: "Po manęs tavo sūnus Saliamonas bus karaliumi, jis sėdės mano soste"? Tad kodėl Adonijas tapo karaliumi? ’
1Ki 1:13 Go and get thee in unto king David, and say unto him, Didst not thou, my lord, O king, swear unto thine handmaid, saying, Assuredly Solomon thy son shall reign after me, and he shall sit upon my throne? why then doth Adonijah reign?
1Pt 1:11 Jie nagrinėjo, kurį ir kokį laiką nurodė juose veikianti Kristaus Dvasia, išpranašavusi Kristaus kentėjimus ir juos lydinčią šlovę.
1P 1:11 Searching what, or what manner of time the Spirit of Christ which was in them did signify, when it testified beforehand the sufferings of Christ, and the glory that should follow.
Dan 3:17 Jei mūsų Dievas, kuriam tarnaujame, gali mus išgelbėti iš ugnimi plieskiančios krosnies ir tavo rankos, karaliau, teišgelbsti.
Da 3:17 If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand, O king.
Iz 43:17 kuris išveda į žygį vežimus ir žirgus, galingą kariuomenę. Jie krinta parblokšti ir nebepakyla, užgesę ir užblėsę kaip dagtis:
Isa 43:17 Which bringeth forth the chariot and horse, the army and the power; they shall lie down together, they shall not rise: they are extinct, they are quenched as tow.
1Kar 1:50 Bijodamas Saliamono, Adonijas tučtuojau nuėjo [į Padangtę] ir laikėsi aukuro ragų.
1Ki 1:50 And Adonijah feared because of Solomon, and arose, and went, and caught hold on the horns of the altar.
Pr 41:36 Tai bus maisto atsargos kraštui, idant nepražūtų kraštas nuo bado, kai Egiptą ištiks septyneri bado metai. "
Ge 41:36 And that food shall be for store to the land against the seven years of famine, which shall be in the land of Egypt; that the land perish not through the famine.
Jer 1:15 Štai aš šaukiu visas šiaurės karalystes, ­tai Viešpaties žodis. ­Jos ateis, ir kiekvienas karalius pasistatyssavo sostą prie Jeruzalės vartų, priešais jos mūro sienąir prieš visus Judo miestus.
Jer 1:15 For, lo, I will call all the families of the kingdoms of the north, saith the LORD; and they shall come, and they shall set every one his throne at the entering of the gates of Jerusalem, and against all the walls thereof round about, and against all the cities of Judah.

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