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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Mt 21:32 Juk Jonas atėjo pas jus teisumo keliu, bet jūs netikėjote juo. O muitininkai ir ištvirkėlės tikėjo. Bet jūs, nors tai matėte, nė vėliau neapsigalvojote ir netikėjote juo.
Mat 21:32 For John came unto you in the way of righteousness, and ye believed him not: but the publicans and the harlots believed him: and ye, when ye had seen it, repented not afterward, that ye might believe him.
Ps 81:7 Varge šaukeisi manęs, ir aš išgelbėjau tave; nematomas atsakiau tau griaustiniu; mėginau tave prie Meribos šaltinių. Sela.
Ps 81:7 Thou calledst in trouble, and I delivered thee; I answered thee in the secret place of thunder: I proved thee at the waters of Meribah. Selah.
Iz 18:5 Dar prieš vynuogių rinkimą, žiedams nužydėjusir vynuogių kekėms ėmus sirpti, jis genekliu apgenės šakelesir šalin numes nupjaustytus metūglius.
Isa 18:5 For afore the harvest, when the bud is perfect, and the sour grape is ripening in the flower, he shall both cut off the sprigs with pruning hooks, and take away and cut down the branches.
Jer 14:19 Nejau tu visiškai atmetei Judą? Ar Sionas tapo tau bjaurus? Nejau mus taip pribloškei, kad jau nebėra mums išgydymo? Tikėjomės taikos, bet nieko gera nematyti; laukėme išgydymo, ir štai vien siaubas!
Jer 14:19 Hast thou utterly rejected Judah? hath thy soul lothed Zion? why hast thou smitten us, and there is no healing for us? we looked for peace, and there is no good; and for the time of healing, and behold trouble!
Iz 36:19 Kur Hamato ir Arpado dievai? Kur Sefarvaimų dievai? Kur Samarijos dievai? Ar išgelbėjo jie Samariją nuo manęs?
Isa 36:19 Where are the gods of Hamath and Arphad? where are the gods of Sepharvaim? and have they delivered Samaria out of my hand?
Lk 7:45 Tu manęs nepabučiavai, o ji, vos man atėjus, nesiliauja bučiavusi man kojų.
Lu 7:45 Thou gavest me no kiss: but this woman since the time I came in hath not ceased to kiss my feet.
Dan 4:12 Jo lapai buvo gražūs pažiūrėti, vaisiai gausūs, ir maisto jame buvo visiems. Po juo laukų žvėrys rado paunksmę, jo šakose krovėsi lizdus padangių paukščiai, iš jo maitinosi visi gyvūnai.
Da 4:12 The leaves thereof were fair, and the fruit thereof much, and in it was meat for all: the beasts of the field had shadow under it, and the fowls of the heaven dwelt in the boughs thereof, and all flesh was fed of it.
Iš 25:5 išdirbti avikailiai, tehašimo oda ir akacijos mediena,
Ex 25:5 And rams' skins dyed red, and badgers' skins, and shittim wood,
Ez 20:43 Tenai jūs atminsite savo kelius ir visus savo darbus, kuriais patys susiteršėte, ir bjaurėsitės savimi dėl visų nedorų darbų, kuriuos esate padarę.
Eze 20:43 And there shall ye remember your ways, and all your doings, wherein ye have been defiled; and ye shall lothe yourselves in your own sight for all your evils that ye have committed.
Jl 1:20 Net laukiniai žvėrys žvelgia į tave, nes išdžiūvo upės, ir ugnis surijo tyrlaukių ganyklas.
Joe 1:20 The beasts of the field cry also unto thee: for the rivers of waters are dried up, and the fire hath devoured the pastures of the wilderness.
2Sam 15:15 Karaliaus dvariškiai sakė karaliui: "Tavo tarnai pasirengę daryti visa, ką tik viešpats mūsų karalius nutars. "
2Sa 15:15 And the king's servants said unto the king, Behold, thy servants are ready to do whatsoever my lord the king shall appoint.
Dan 9:26 Po šešiasdešimt dviejų septynetų pateptasis bus nužudytas, bet ne dėl savo kaltės, o ateisiančio vado tauta sunaikins miestą ir šventyklą. Jo galas ateis lyg potvynis, iki pat galo vyks karas ir skirtasis niokojimas.
Da 9:26 And after threescore and two weeks shall Messiah be cut off, but not for himself: and the people of the prince that shall come shall destroy the city and the sanctuary; and the end thereof shall be with a flood, and unto the end of the war desolations are determined.
1Kor 3:19 Šio pasaulio išmintis Dievo akyse yra kvailybė. Parašyta: Jis sugauna protinguosius jų gudrybėje.
1C 3:19 For the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God. For it is written, He taketh the wise in their own craftiness.
Jer 20:12 Galybių Viešpatie, tu ištiri teisųjį, tu permatai jausmus ir širdį; leisk man matyti, kaip jiems keršysi, nes tau patikėjau savo reikalą.
Jer 20:12 But, O LORD of hosts, that triest the righteous, and seest the reins and the heart, let me see thy vengeance on them: for unto thee have I opened my cause.
Apd 2:26 Todėl pralinksmėjo mano širdis, krykštavo mano lūpos, ir mano kūnas ilsėsis su viltimi,
Ac 2:26 Therefore did my heart rejoice, and my tongue was glad; moreover also my flesh shall rest in hope:
Joz 11:4 Jie išėjo į mūšį su didele kariuomene, lydimi visų savo pajėgų, tokių gausių, kaip smiltys pajūryje, su daugybe žirgų ir kovos vežimų.
Jos 11:4 And they went out, they and all their hosts with them, much people, even as the sand that is upon the sea shore in multitude, with horses and chariots very many.
Ps 141:2 Priimk mano maldą kaip smilkalus, o mano iškeltas rankas kaip vakarinę auką.
Ps 141:2 Let my prayer be set forth before thee as incense; and the lifting up of my hands as the evening sacrifice.
1Kor 15:31 Prisiekiu savo pasididžiavimu ­ jumis, broliai, mūsų Viešpatyje Kristuje Jėzuje, jog aš kasdien mirštu!
1C 15:31 I protest by your rejoicing which I have in Christ Jesus our Lord, I die daily.
2Kar 22:8 Vyriausiasis kunigas Hilkijas tarė raštininkui Šafanui: "Radau Įstatymo knygą Viešpaties Namuose. " Hilkijas padavė knygą Šafanui, ir šis perskaitė ją.
2Ki 22:8 And Hilkiah the high priest said unto Shaphan the scribe, I have found the book of the law in the house of the LORD. And Hilkiah gave the book to Shaphan, and he read it.
Ef 6:5 Jūs, vergai, klausykite savo žemiškųjų šeimininkų su baime ir pagarba, su neklastinga širdimi lyg kad Kristaus,
Ep 6:5 Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as unto Christ;

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