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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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2Sam 1:9 Tada jis tarė man: ‘Ateik, stokis ant manęs ir pribaik mane, nes aš kankinuosi ir esu vos gyvas. ’
2Sa 1:9 He said unto me again, Stand, I pray thee, upon me, and slay me: for anguish is come upon me, because my life is yet whole in me.
Pr 48:22 Dabar aš duodu tau viena dalimi daugiau negu tavo broliams, ­ dalį, kurią atėmiau iš amoritų rankos savo kalaviju ir lanku. "
Ge 48:22 Moreover I have given to thee one portion above thy brethren, which I took out of the hand of the Amorite with my sword and with my bow.
Pr 14:14 Išgirdęs, kad jo brolio sūnus pagrobtas į nelaisvę, Abromas sutelkė tris šimtus aštuoniolika vyrų ­ savo išlaikytinių, gimusių jo šeimynoje ­ ir vijosi iki pat Dano.
Ge 14:14 And when Abram heard that his brother was taken captive, he armed his trained servants, born in his own house, three hundred and eighteen, and pursued them unto Dan.
1Tes 2:18 Todėl ruošėmės atvykti pas jus ­ bent jau aš, Paulius, ruošiausi kartą ir kitą, ­ tačiau mus sutrukdė šėtonas.
1Th 2:18 Wherefore we would have come unto you, even I Paul, once and again; but Satan hindered us.
Iš 36:27 O Padangtės užpakalinei sienai ­ vakarų šonui ­ padirbo šešias lentas.
Ex 36:27 And for the sides of the tabernacle westward he made six boards.
Pat 29:2 Kai teisieji vyrauja, tauta džiaugiasi, o kai nedorėliai valdo, tauta dejuoja.
Pr 29:2 When the righteous are in authority, the people rejoice: but when the wicked beareth rule, the people mourn.
Iz 44:22 Išsklaidysiu tavo nusižengimus kaip debesį, tavo nuodėmes kaip miglą. Sugrįžk pas mane, nes tave išpirkau.
Isa 44:22 I have blotted out, as a thick cloud, thy transgressions, and, as a cloud, thy sins: return unto me; for I have redeemed thee.
Jer 7:29 Nusikirpk nazyro plaukus ir mesk juos šalin! Kalvose užtrauk liūdną raudą! Juk Viešpats atmetė ir paliko kartą, sukėlusią jo pyktį.
Jer 7:29 Cut off thine hair, O Jerusalem, and cast it away, and take up a lamentation on high places; for the LORD hath rejected and forsaken the generation of his wrath.
Apd 15:8 Ir Dievas, kuris pažįsta širdis, paliudijo jų naudai, duodamas jiems Šventąją Dvasią kaip ir mums.
Ac 15:8 And God, which knoweth the hearts, bare them witness, giving them the Holy Ghost, even as he did unto us;
1Kar 2:36 Tada karalius pasišaukė Šimį. "Pasistatyk sau namus Jeruzalėje, ­ tarė jam, ­ ir gyvenk ten. Niekada ir niekur kitur neišeik!
1Ki 2:36 And the king sent and called for Shimei, and said unto him, Build thee an house in Jerusalem, and dwell there, and go not forth thence any whither.
Įst 31:10 Mozė įsakė jiems, tardamas: "Kas septinti metai paskirtu laiku, atleidimo metais, Palapinių iškilmėje
De 31:10 And Moses commanded them, saying, At the end of every seven years, in the solemnity of the year of release, in the feast of tabernacles,
Iš 40:33 Aplink Padangtę bei aukurą jis įrengė kiemą ir užkabino užuolaidą ant kiemo vartų. Taip Mozė užbaigė darbą.
Ex 40:33 And he reared up the court round about the tabernacle and the altar, and set up the hanging of the court gate. So Moses finished the work.
Ef 5:3 Užtat ištvirkavimas, visoks netyrumas ar godulystė tenebūna jūsų net minimi, kaip dera šventiesiems;
Ep 5:3 But fornication, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not be once named among you, as becometh saints;
Iš 4:24 Atsitiko taip, kad kelionės metu nakvojant vienoje užeigoje, Viešpats pasitiko Mozę ir bandė jį užmušti.
Ex 4:24 And it came to pass by the way in the inn, that the LORD met him, and sought to kill him.
1Kar 6:31 Duris į vidinę šventyklą jis padarė iš alyvos medžio. Durų sąrama ir staktos buvo penkiašonės.
1Ki 6:31 And for the entering of the oracle he made doors of olive tree: the lintel and side posts were a fifth part of the wall.
2Kar 3:26 Pamatęs, kad mūšis krypsta jo nenaudai, Moabo karalius pasiėmė septynis šimtus kalavijais ginkluotų vyrų ir bandė prasilaužti pro Edomo karalių, bet jiems nepavyko.
2Ki 3:26 And when the king of Moab saw that the battle was too sore for him, he took with him seven hundred men that drew swords, to break through even unto the king of Edom: but they could not.
Įst 3:14 Manaso sūnus Jayras gavo visą Argobo sritį, tai yra Bašaną, iki pat gešūriečių bei maakų ribos ir pavadino ją savo paties vardu ­ Havot Jayru, kaip ji tebevadinama ir dabar. )
De 3:14 Jair the son of Manasseh took all the country of Argob unto the coasts of Geshuri and Maachathi; and called them after his own name, Bashanhavothjair, unto this day.
Apd 14:7 Ten jie skelbė gerąją naujieną.
Ac 14:7 And there they preached the gospel.
Lk 18:1 Jėzus pasakė jiems palyginimą, kaip reikia visuomet melstis ir nepaliauti.
Lu 18:1 And he spake a parable unto them to this end, that men ought always to pray, and not to faint;
Gg 5:6 Atidariau savo mylimajam, bet jis buvo nusisukęs ir nuėjęs. Apmiriau, kad jis nuėjo! Ieškojau, bet negalėjau rasti; šaukiau, bet jis neatsišaukė.
SS 5:6 I opened to my beloved; but my beloved had withdrawn himself, and was gone: my soul failed when he spake: I sought him, but I could not find him; I called him, but he gave me no answer.

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