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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Joz 2:14 "Mūsų gyvybė už jūsų gyvybę! ­ atsakė jai vyrai. ­ Jei tu mūsų reikalo neišduosi, mes elgsimės su tavimi maloniai ir ištikimai, kai Viešpats atiduos mums kraštą. "
Jos 2:14 And the men answered her, Our life for yours, if ye utter not this our business. And it shall be, when the LORD hath given us the land, that we will deal kindly and truly with thee.
Iz 13:6 Vaitokite, nes Viešpaties diena jau arti; ji ateis kaip sunaikinimas iš Visagalio.
Isa 13:6 Howl ye; for the day of the LORD is at hand; it shall come as a destruction from the Almighty.
Iš 19:21 Tada Viešpats tarė Mozei: "Leiskis žemyn ir įspėk žmones, kad nesiveržtų pas Viešpatį jo pamatyti. Antraip daug kas iš jų pražus.
Ex 19:21 And the LORD said unto Moses, Go down, charge the people, lest they break through unto the LORD to gaze, and many of them perish.
2Krn 10:9 Jų klausė: "Ką patariate sakyti žmonėms, kurie sakė: ‘Palengvink jungą, kurį tavo tėvas mums uždėjo? ’"
2Ch 10:9 And he said unto them, What advice give ye that we may return answer to this people, which have spoken to me, saying, Ease somewhat the yoke that thy father did put upon us?
Am 2:11 Aš išsirinkau pranašų iš jūsų sūnųir nazyrų iš jūsų jaunuolių. Argi ne taip yra iš tikrųjų, Izraelio tauta? ­ tai Viešpaties žodis.
Am 2:11 And I raised up of your sons for prophets, and of your young men for Nazarites. Is it not even thus, O ye children of Israel? saith the LORD.
Mk 2:19 Jėzus atsakė: "Argi gali vestuvių svečiai pasninkauti, kol su jais yra jaunikis? Kol jie turi jaunikį, jie negali pasninkauti.
Mar 2:19 And Jesus said unto them, Can the children of the bridechamber fast, while the bridegroom is with them? as long as they have the bridegroom with them, they cannot fast.
Iš 5:5 Faraonas tęsė: "Žiūrėkite, jie gausesni už krašto gyventojus, o judu norite atleisti juos nuo lažo! "
Ex 5:5 And Pharaoh said, Behold, the people of the land now are many, and ye make them rest from their burdens.
Mt 26:70 Bet jis išsigynė visų akivaizdoje: "Aš nežinau, ką tu sakai. "
Mat 26:70 But he denied before them all, saying, I know not what thou sayest.
1Krn 2:1 Štai Izraelio sūnūs: Rubenas, Simeonas, Levis, Judas, Isacharas, Zabulonas,
1Ch 2:1 These are the sons of Israel; Reuben, Simeon, Levi, and Judah, Issachar, and Zebulun,
Pr 46:33 Kai faraonas pasišauks jus ir paklaus: ‘Koks jūsų užsiėmimas? ’ ­
Ge 46:33 And it shall come to pass, when Pharaoh shall call you, and shall say, What is your occupation?
Žyd 7:24 O kadangi šitas išlieka per amžius, jis turi neatšaukiamą kunigystę.
He 7:24 But this man, because he continueth ever, hath an unchangeable priesthood.
Jn 2:7 Jėzus jiems liepė: "Pripilkite indus vandens. " Jie pripylė sklidinus.
Jo 2:7 Jesus saith unto them, Fill the waterpots with water. And they filled them up to the brim.
Jer 16:8 Nekelk kojos į namus, kur žmonės puotauja, nesėsk su jais už stalo valgyti ir gerti. "
Jer 16:8 Thou shalt not also go into the house of feasting, to sit with them to eat and to drink.
2Krn 10:17 Bet Rehabeamas ir toliau valdė izraelitus, gyvenančius Judo miestuose.
2Ch 10:17 But as for the children of Israel that dwelt in the cities of Judah, Rehoboam reigned over them.
1Tes 5:9 Juk Dievas paskyrė mus ne tam, kad užsitrauktume rūstybę, bet kad įgytume išganymą per mūsų Viešpatį Jėzų Kristų,
1Th 5:9 For God hath not appointed us to wrath, but to obtain salvation by our Lord Jesus Christ,
Joz 2:9 Ji sakė vyrams: "Žinau, kad Viešpats yra šį kraštą jums atidavęs, nes dėl jūsų mus yra apėmęs išgąstis. Visi krašto gyventojai dėl jūsų dreba!
Jos 2:9 And she said unto the men, I know that the LORD hath given you the land, and that your terror is fallen upon us, and that all the inhabitants of the land faint because of you.
Iz 50:5 Viešpats DIEVAS atvėrė man ausis. Aš nemaištavau, atgal nesitraukiau.
Isa 50:5 The Lord GOD hath opened mine ear, and I was not rebellious, neither turned away back.
Mt 19:18 Tas paklausė: "Kokių? " Jėzus atsakė: "Nežudyk, nesvetimauk, nevok, melagingai neliudyk;
Mat 19:18 He saith unto him, Which? Jesus said, Thou shalt do no murder, Thou shalt not commit adultery, Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not bear false witness,
Jer 36:15 "Prašom sėstis, ­ jie tarė jam, ­ ir perskaityti. " Ir Baruchas jiems perskaitė.
Jer 36:15 And they said unto him, Sit down now, and read it in our ears. So Baruch read it in their ears.
Lk 3:4 kaip parašyta pranašo Izaijo kalbų knygoje: Tyruose šaukiančiojo balsas: Taisykite Viešpačiui kelią! Ištiesinkite jam takus!
Lu 3:4 As it is written in the book of the words of Esaias the prophet, saying, The voice of one crying in the wilderness, Prepare ye the way of the Lord, make his paths straight.

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