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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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2Krn 6:15 Tu savo tarnui, mano tėvui Dovydui, įvykdei, ką buvai pažadėjęs. Iš tikrųjų, ką pažadėjai savo lūpomis, šiandien įvykdei savo ranka.
2Ch 6:15 Thou which hast kept with thy servant David my father that which thou hast promised him; and spakest with thy mouth, and hast fulfilled it with thine hand, as it is this day.
2Krn 17:7 Trečiais savo karaliavimo metais jis pasiuntė savo pareigūnus Ben Hailą, Abdiją, Zachariją, Netanelį ir Mikają mokyti Judo miestuose.
2Ch 17:7 Also in the third year of his reign he sent to his princes, even to Benhail, and to Obadiah, and to Zechariah, and to Nethaneel, and to Michaiah, to teach in the cities of Judah.
Pr 32:12 Betgi tu pats pasakei: ‘Aš būsiu tau labai geras ir padarysiu tavo palikuonis kaip jūros smiltis, kurių dėl gausumo negalima suskaityti. ’"
Ge 32:12 And thou saidst, I will surely do thee good, and make thy seed as the sand of the sea, which cannot be numbered for multitude.
2Sam 20:4 Tada karalius tarė Amasai: "Per tris dienas sušauk Judo vyrus pas mane. Ateik ir pats! "
2Sa 20:4 Then said the king to Amasa, Assemble me the men of Judah within three days, and be thou here present.
Pr 26:1 Krašte kilo badas, skirtingas nuo ankstesnio bado, kilusio Abraomo dienomis, ir Izaokas išsikėlė į Gerarą pas filistinų karalių Abimelechą.
Ge 26:1 And there was a famine in the land, beside the first famine that was in the days of Abraham. And Isaac went unto Abimelech king of the Philistines unto Gerar.
Pr 18:22 Vyrai pasuko Sodomos link. Tuo tarpu Abraomas liko stovėti priešais Viešpatį.
Ge 18:22 And the men turned their faces from thence, and went toward Sodom: but Abraham stood yet before the LORD.
1Jn 3:12 Ne kaip Kainas, kuris buvo iš piktojoir nužudė savo brolį. Kodėl nužudė? Kad jo darbai buvo pikti, o brolio ­ teisūs.
1J 3:12 Not as Cain, who was of that wicked one, and slew his brother. And wherefore slew he him? Because his own works were evil, and his brother's righteous.
Jn 13:2 Vakarieniaujant, kai velnias jau buvo įkvėpęs Simono sūnaus Judo Iskarijoto širdin sumanymą išduoti jį,
Jo 13:2 And supper being ended, the devil having now put into the heart of Judas Iscariot, Simon's son, to betray him;
Ps 22:2 Mano Dieve, mano Dieve, kodėl mane palikai? Kodėl tu toks tolimas, toli nuo mano maldos, nuo mano dejonės šauksmo?
Ps 22:2 O my God, I cry in the day time, but thou hearest not; and in the night season, and am not silent.
Pat 6:27 Argi gali žmogus užsikurti ugnį sterblėje, nesudegindamas savo drabužių?
Pr 6:27 Can a man take fire in his bosom, and his clothes not be burned?
Ps 65:9 Tu lankai kraštą ir palaistai, padarai jį turtingą ir derlingą. Tavo upė, Dieve, pilna vandens, tu įgalini žemę auginti pasėlius. Juk tu ją parengi!
Ps 65:9 Thou visitest the earth, and waterest it: thou greatly enrichest it with the river of God, which is full of water: thou preparest them corn, when thou hast so provided for it.
Jer 8:21 Dukters, mano tautos, žaizdos sukrėtė mane; aš baisiai nusiminęs, siaubas apėmė mane.
Jer 8:21 For the hurt of the daughter of my people am I hurt; I am black; astonishment hath taken hold on me.
Ps 59:1 Choro vadovui. "Nesunaikink" melodija. Dovydo miktamas , Sauliui pasiuntus vyrus prie jo namų tykoti ir nužudyti. Išgelbėk mane nuo priešų, Dieve, apsaugok nuo užpuolikų!
Ps 59:1 Deliver me from mine enemies, O my God: defend me from them that rise up against me.
Jer 18:10 bet jeigu ši tauta elgiasi nedorai mano akyse, neklausydama mano balso, aš pakeičiu savo mintį apie gera, kuriuo žadėjau ją laiminti.
Jer 18:10 If it do evil in my sight, that it obey not my voice, then I will repent of the good, wherewith I said I would benefit them.
1Sam 6:12 Karvės ėjo tiesiai į priekį Bet Šemešo link, ėjo vis tuo pačiu keliu baubdamos, nesukdamos nei į dešinę, nei į kairę. O filistinų didžiūnai ėjo paskui jas iki pat Bet Šemešo ribos.
1Sa 6:12 And the kine took the straight way to the way of Bethshemesh, and went along the highway, lowing as they went, and turned not aside to the right hand or to the left; and the lords of the Philistines went after them unto the border of Bethshemesh.
Iz 44:2 Taip kalba Viešpats, tavo kūrėjas, kuris auklėjo tave nuo pat gimimo ir tau padėjo: "Nebijok, Jokūbai, mano tarne, brangusis, kurį išsirinkau!
Isa 44:2 Thus saith the LORD that made thee, and formed thee from the womb, which will help thee; Fear not, O Jacob, my servant; and thou, Jesurun, whom I have chosen.
Jn 10:30 Aš ir Tėvas esame viena. "
Jo 10:30 I and my Father are one.
Job 6:8 O, kad mano prašymas būtų patenkintasir Dievas suteiktų, ko trokštu!
Job 6:8 Oh that I might have my request; and that God would grant me the thing that I long for!
Koh 1:2 Miglų migla! ­ sako Mokytojas. Miglų migla! Viskas migla!
Ec 1:2 Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher, vanity of vanities; all is vanity.
Apd 8:21 Šitame dalyke tu negali turėti nė mažiausios dalies, nes tavo širdis Dievo akivaizdoje neteisi.
Ac 8:21 Thou hast neither part nor lot in this matter: for thy heart is not right in the sight of God.

Sanctus Corpus Deus