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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Mt 4:10 Tada Jėzus atsako: "Eik šalin, šėtone! Juk parašyta: Viešpatį, savo Dievą, tegarbinkir jam vienam tetarnauk! "
Mat 4:10 Then saith Jesus unto him, Get thee hence, Satan: for it is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt thou serve.
Est 4:15 Tada Estera, atsakydama Mordechajui, tarė:
Es 4:15 Then Esther bade them return Mordecai this answer,
Ps 88:11 Argi apie tavo gerumą bus pasakojama kape, o apie tavo ištikimybę Pražūties vietoje?
Ps 88:11 Shall thy lovingkindness be declared in the grave? or thy faithfulness in destruction?
Apd 9:14 Ir čia jis turi aukštųjų kunigų įgaliojimus suiminėti visus, kurie šaukiasi tavojo vardo. "
Ac 9:14 And here he hath authority from the chief priests to bind all that call on thy name.
Kun 26:1 Nedirbsite sau stabų. Nesistatysite statulų ar šventųjų stulpų, nesistatysite savo krašte akmenų su išraižytais [stabais], kad juos garbintumėte, nes aš esu Viešpats, jūsų Dievas.
Le 26:1 Ye shall make you no idols nor graven image, neither rear you up a standing image, neither shall ye set up any image of stone in your land, to bow down unto it: for I am the LORD your God.
Apd 18:17 Tada visi graikai užpuolė sinagogos vyresnįjį Sosteną ir teismo akyse jį sumušė. Galionas į tai nekreipė dėmesio.
Ac 18:17 Then all the Greeks took Sosthenes, the chief ruler of the synagogue, and beat him before the judgment seat. And Gallio cared for none of those things.
Jok 4:3 Jūs prašote ir negaunate, nes negerai prašote ­ tik savo įnoriams patenkinti.
Ja 4:3 Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts.
1Tim 6:2 O tie, kurie turi tikinčius šeimininkus, tegul jų neniekina už tai, kad jie yra broliai; verčiau tegul jiems dar geriau tarnauja, nes jie, būdami tikintys ir mylimi, įvertina gerus tarnavimo darbus.
1Ti 6:2 And they that have believing masters, let them not despise them, because they are brethren; but rather do them service, because they are faithful and beloved, partakers of the benefit. These things teach and exhort.
Įst 28:35 Viešpats ištiks tave keliuose ir šlaunyse, nuo kojų padų ligi viršugalvio, piktybiniais pūliniais, nuo kurių negalėsi būti išgydytas.
De 28:35 The LORD shall smite thee in the knees, and in the legs, with a sore botch that cannot be healed, from the sole of thy foot unto the top of thy head.
Ps 127:4 Lyg strėlės galiūno rankojeyra jaunystėje žmogui gimę sūnūs.
Ps 127:4 As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth.
Rom 5:8 O Dievas mums parodė savo meilę tuo, kad Kristus numirė už mus, kai tebebuvome nusidėjėliai.
Ro 5:8 But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
Iš 3:13 "Betgi, ­ Mozė sakė Dievui, ­ kai nueisiu pas izraelitus ir sakysiu jiems: ‘Jūsų protėvių Dievas atsiuntė mane pas jus’, o jie manęs klaus: ‘Koks jo vardas? ’ ­ ką aš jiems pasakysiu? "
Ex 3:13 And Moses said unto God, Behold, when I come unto the children of Israel, and shall say unto them, The God of your fathers hath sent me unto you; and they shall say to me, What is his name? what shall I say unto them?
Apd 8:24 Simonas atsakė: "Melskite už mane Viešpatį, kad manęs neištiktų, ką jūs pasakėte. "
Ac 8:24 Then answered Simon, and said, Pray ye to the LORD for me, that none of these things which ye have spoken come upon me.
Ts 2:6 Jozuei paleidus žmones, visi izraelitai ėjo į savo paveldą užimti krašto.
Judg 2:6 And when Joshua had let the people go, the children of Israel went every man unto his inheritance to possess the land.
Job 5:4 Jo vaikai nesaugūs, trypiami teismuose, ir nėra kam jų apginti.
Job 5:4 His children are far from safety, and they are crushed in the gate, neither is there any to deliver them.
Mt 18:11 Žmogaus Sūnus atėjo gelbėti, kas buvo pražuvę.
Mat 18:11 For the Son of man is come to save that which was lost.
Kun 11:46 Tokie tat nuostatai dėl gyvulių, paukščių ir visų gyvūnų, plaukiojančių vandenyse, bei visų gyvūnų, knibždančių žemėje,
Le 11:46 This is the law of the beasts, and of the fowl, and of every living creature that moveth in the waters, and of every creature that creepeth upon the earth:
Įst 22:12 Pasidarysi kutus keturiuose kampuose apsiausto, kuriuo apsisiauti.
De 22:12 Thou shalt make thee fringes upon the four quarters of thy vesture, wherewith thou coverest thyself.
Lk 14:22 Tarnas ir vėl pranešė: ‘Šeimininke, kaip buvai liepęs, padaryta, bet dar yra vietos. ’
Lu 14:22 And the servant said, Lord, it is done as thou hast commanded, and yet there is room.
Jn 10:26 Bet jūs netikite, nes jūs ­ ne manosios avys.
Jo 10:26 But ye believe not, because ye are not of my sheep, as I said unto you.

Sanctus Corpus Deus