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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Kol 1:20 ir, darydamas jo kryžiaus krauju taiką, per jį sutaikinti su savimivisa, kas yra žemėje ir danguje.
Co 1:20 And, having made peace through the blood of his cross, by him to reconcile all things unto himself; by him, I say, whether they be things in earth, or things in heaven.
Mk 1:28 Gandas apie jį greitai pasklido po visą Galilėjos šalį.
Mar 1:28 And immediately his fame spread abroad throughout all the region round about Galilee.
1Sam 24:1 Kai, nuvijęs filistinus, Saulius sugrįžo, jam buvo pranešta: "Žiūrėk, Dovydas yra En Gedžio dykumoje. "
1Sa 24:1 And it came to pass, when Saul was returned from following the Philistines, that it was told him, saying, Behold, David is in the wilderness of Engedi.
Dan 2:32 Tos statulos galva buvo gryno aukso, krūtinė ir rankos ­ sidabro, pilvas ir šlaunys ­ žalvario,
Da 2:32 This image's head was of fine gold, his breast and his arms of silver, his belly and his thighs of brass,
2Krn 20:1 Po to moabitai, amonitai ir drauge su jais būrys meunų atėjo kariauti su Juozapatu.
2Ch 20:1 It came to pass after this also, that the children of Moab, and the children of Ammon, and with them other beside the Ammonites, came against Jehoshaphat to battle.
Ps 39:12 Išgirsk mano maldą, Viešpatie, klausykis mano šauksmo, ateik į pagalbą, kai verkiu! Juk aš tik praeinantis svečias, praeiviskaip visi mano protėviai.
Ps 39:12 Hear my prayer, O LORD, and give ear unto my cry; hold not thy peace at my tears: for I am a stranger with thee, and a sojourner, as all my fathers were.
Iš 10:3 Taigi Mozė ir Aaronas nuėjo pas faraoną ir tarė jam: "Taip kalbėjo Viešpats, hebrajų Dievas: ‘Kaip ilgai atsisakinėsi nusižeminti prieš mane? Leisk mano tautai eiti manęs pagarbinti!
Ex 10:3 And Moses and Aaron came in unto Pharaoh, and said unto him, Thus saith the LORD God of the Hebrews, How long wilt thou refuse to humble thyself before me? let my people go, that they may serve me.
Sk 33:31 Iškeliavę iš Moserotų, pasistatė stovyklą prie Bene Jaakano.
Nu 33:31 And they departed from Moseroth, and pitched in Benejaakan.
Ez 18:12 skriaudžiantį vargšus ir beturčius, atimantį daiktus prievarta, negrąžinantį užstato skolininkui, akis keliantį į stabus, darantį bjaurų nusikaltimą,
Eze 18:12 Hath oppressed the poor and needy, hath spoiled by violence, hath not restored the pledge, and hath lifted up his eyes to the idols, hath committed abomination,
Sk 21:25 Izraelis paėmė visus tuos miestus. Izraelis apsigyveno visuose amoritų miestuose, Hešbone ir visose jam pavaldžiose gyvenvietėse.
Nu 21:25 And Israel took all these cities: and Israel dwelt in all the cities of the Amorites, in Heshbon, and in all the villages thereof.
Job 26:14 Tai tik jo galybės užuominos, mes tik jos šnabždesį teišgirstame. Kas gali suprasti jo galybės griausmą? "
Job 26:14 Lo, these are parts of his ways: but how little a portion is heard of him? but the thunder of his power who can understand?
Iz 9:20 Nors ir griebtų iš dešinės, jie liktų alkani, nors ir ry´tų iš kairės, jie dar nepasisotintų.
Isa 9:20 And he shall snatch on the right hand, and be hungry; and he shall eat on the left hand, and they shall not be satisfied: they shall eat every man the flesh of his own arm:
Ps 9:9 ו Viešpats ­ nuengtųjų tvirtovė, tvirtovė nelaimės metu!
Ps 9:9 The LORD also will be a refuge for the oppressed, a refuge in times of trouble.
1Kar 21:8 Parašiusi laiškus Ahabo vardu, ji užantspaudavo jo žiedu ir pasiuntė seniūnams bei didikams, gyvenantiems su Nabotu jo mieste.
1Ki 21:8 So she wrote letters in Ahab's name, and sealed them with his seal, and sent the letters unto the elders and to the nobles that were in his city, dwelling with Naboth.
Jer 11:6 Viešpats man tarė: "Paskelbk visus šiuos nuostatus Judo miestuose ir Jeruzalės gatvėse, sakydamas: ‘Klausykite šios Sandoros nuostatų ir vykdykite juos. ’
Jer 11:6 Then the LORD said unto me, Proclaim all these words in the cities of Judah, and in the streets of Jerusalem, saying, Hear ye the words of this covenant, and do them.
Pr 12:19 Kodėl sakei: ‘Ji mano sesuo’? Aš paėmiau ją už žmoną. O dabar štai tavo žmona! Pasiimk ir išeik! "
Ge 12:19 Why saidst thou, She is my sister? so I might have taken her to me to wife: now therefore behold thy wife, take her, and go thy way.
Ps 105:6 Abraomo palikuonys, jo tarnai, Jokūbo vaikai, jo išrinktieji!
Ps 105:6 O ye seed of Abraham his servant, ye children of Jacob his chosen.
Joz 8:3 Taigi Jozuė ir visi kariai pasiruošė žygiuoti prieš Ają. Išrinkęs trisdešimt tūkstančių vyrų, narsių karių, jis išsiuntė juos pirma nakčia.
Jos 8:3 So Joshua arose, and all the people of war, to go up against Ai: and Joshua chose out thirty thousand mighty men of valour, and sent them away by night.
Lk 1:57 Elzbietai atėjo metas gimdyti, ir ji susilaukė sūnaus.
Lu 1:57 Now Elisabeth's full time came that she should be delivered; and she brought forth a son.
1Kor 2:16 Kas gi yra suvokęs Viešpaties mintį, kad galėtų jį pamokyti? O mes turime Kristaus išmonę.
1C 2:16 For who hath known the mind of the Lord, that he may instruct him? but we have the mind of Christ.

Sanctus Corpus Deus