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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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2Sam 20:15 Joabo pajėgos apgulė jį Abel Bet Maakoje ir prieš išorinę miesto sieną supylė apgulos pylimą. Joabo kareiviai puolė su mūrdaužiais sieną, norėdami ją pralaužti.
2Sa 20:15 And they came and besieged him in Abel of Bethmaachah, and they cast up a bank against the city, and it stood in the trench: and all the people that were with Joab battered the wall, to throw it down.
Pat 6:12 Suktas ir nedoras žmogusgyvena apgaulingai kalbėdamas,
Pr 6:12 A naughty person, a wicked man, walketh with a froward mouth.
Ezd 6:8 Be to, šiuo įsakau, ką jūs turite daryti, kad padėtumėte tiems žydų seniūnams atstatyti Dievo Namus: tų žmonių išlaidos turi būti tučtuojau atlygintos iš karaliaus išteklių, paimtų iš Užupio srities duoklės.
Ezr 6:8 Moreover I make a decree what ye shall do to the elders of these Jews for the building of this house of God: that of the king's goods, even of the tribute beyond the river, forthwith expenses be given unto these men, that they be not hindered.
Ps 92:4 Juk tu, Viešpatie, pradžiuginai mane savo veikla, tad su džiaugsmu apgiedu tavo rankų darbus.
Ps 92:4 For thou, LORD, hast made me glad through thy work: I will triumph in the works of thy hands.
Pr 15:19 kraštą kainitų, kenazų, kedemiečių,
Ge 15:19 The Kenites, and the Kenizzites, and the Kadmonites,
Jn 10:12 Samdinys, ne ganytojas, kuriam avys ne savos, pamatęs sėlinantį vilką, palieka avis ir pabėga, o vilkas puola jas ir išvaiko.
Jo 10:12 But he that is an hireling, and not the shepherd, whose own the sheep are not, seeth the wolf coming, and leaveth the sheep, and fleeth: and the wolf catcheth them, and scattereth the sheep.
Kun 18:14 Neatidengsi savo dėdės nuogumo, tai yra nesueisi su jo žmona, nes ji tavo dėdienė.
Le 18:14 Thou shalt not uncover the nakedness of thy father's brother, thou shalt not approach to his wife: she is thine aunt.
Ez 34:14 Ganysiu jas vešlioje ganykloje, Izraelio kalnų aukštumos bus jų buveinė. Izraelio kalnų aukštumose jos ilsėsis, geroje buveinėje, ir ganysis vešlioje ganykloje.
Eze 34:14 I will feed them in a good pasture, and upon the high mountains of Israel shall their fold be: there shall they lie in a good fold, and in a fat pasture shall they feed upon the mountains of Israel.
1Kar 6:34 ir dvigubas duris iš kipariso. Kiekvienerios durys buvo iš dviejų suveriamų dalių.
1Ki 6:34 And the two doors were of fir tree: the two leaves of the one door were folding, and the two leaves of the other door were folding.
Ez 27:4 Tavo sienos ­ marių širdyje, o tavo statytojai padarė tave tobulai gražų.
Eze 27:4 Thy borders are in the midst of the seas, thy builders have perfected thy beauty.
Ez 11:18 Atvykę ten, jie pašalins iš jos visus stabus ir visus bjauriuosius nusikaltimus.
Eze 11:18 And they shall come thither, and they shall take away all the detestable things thereof and all the abominations thereof from thence.
1Kar 1:35 Atžygiuokite tada paskui jį. Teateina jis ir teatsisėda į mano sostą. Karaliumi vietoj manęs bus jis, nes aš jį paskyriau valdovu Izraeliui ir Judui. " ­
1Ki 1:35 Then ye shall come up after him, that he may come and sit upon my throne; for he shall be king in my stead: and I have appointed him to be ruler over Israel and over Judah.
Iš 37:24 Žvakidę ir jos reikmenis jis padarė iš vieno talento gryno aukso.
Ex 37:24 Of a talent of pure gold made he it, and all the vessels thereof.
Sk 33:18 Iškeliavę iš Hacerotų, pasistatė stovyklą prie Ritmos.
Nu 33:18 And they departed from Hazeroth, and pitched in Rithmah.
Zch 12:13 Levio namų kiltis skyrium ir jų žmonos atskirai; šimių kiltis skyrium ir jų žmonos atskirai;
Zec 12:13 The family of the house of Levi apart, and their wives apart; the family of Shimei apart, and their wives apart;
Pr 11:14 Šelachas buvo trisdešimtmetis, kai jam gimė Eberas.
Ge 11:14 And Salah lived thirty years, and begat Eber:
Ps 35:14 tartum būčiau meldęsis už savo bičiulį ar brolį. Klajojau neramus, lyg motiną apraudodamas, gedulo prislėgtas.
Ps 35:14 I behaved myself as though he had been my friend or brother: I bowed down heavily, as one that mourneth for his mother.
Mt 14:1 Anuo metu gandas apie Jėzų pasiekė tetrarcho Erodo ausis,
Mat 14:1 At that time Herod the tetrarch heard of the fame of Jesus,
Žyd 12:14 Siekite santaikos su visais, siekite šventumo, be kurio niekas neregės Viešpaties.
He 12:14 Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord:
2Krn 11:19 Ji pagimdė jam sūnus: Jeušą, Šemariją ir Zahamą.
2Ch 11:19 Which bare him children; Jeush, and Shamariah, and Zaham.

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