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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Fil 4:18 O aš esu visko gavęs ir turiu per akis. Aš visiškai aprūpintas, per Epafroditą gavęs kvapią dovaną, Dievui priimtiną ir patinkamą auką.
Phil 4:18 But I have all, and abound: I am full, having received of Epaphroditus the things which were sent from you, an odour of a sweet smell, a sacrifice acceptable, wellpleasing to God.
Ps 6:4 Viešpatie, atsigręžk! Gelbėk mane! Išvaduok mane dėl savo ištikimosios meilės!
Ps 6:4 Return, O LORD, deliver my soul: oh save me for thy mercies' sake.
Koh 3:9 Tad kokia nauda dirbančiajam iš jo triūso?
Ec 3:9 What profit hath he that worketh in that wherein he laboureth?
2Kar 15:13 Jabešo sūnus Šalumas tapo karaliumi trisdešimt devintaisiais Judo karaliaus Uzijo metais ir karaliavo Samarijoje vieną mėnesį.
2Ki 15:13 Shallum the son of Jabesh began to reign in the nine and thirtieth year of Uzziah king of Judah; and he reigned a full month in Samaria.
Apd 19:39 O jeigu jūs turite kokį kitą apsvarstytiną reikalą, tai jį bus galima išspręsti teisėtame liaudies susirinkime.
Ac 19:39 But if ye enquire any thing concerning other matters, it shall be determined in a lawful assembly.
2Tes 3:10 Dar būdami pas jus, skelbėme: "Kas nenori dirbti, tenevalgo! "
2Th 3:10 For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat.
Job 34:25 Kadangi pažįsta jų darbus, jis parbloškia juos ir sutriuškina naktį.
Job 34:25 Therefore he knoweth their works, and he overturneth them in the night, so that they are destroyed.
Est 1:10 Septintą dieną, kai karaliaus širdis buvo įsilinksminusi nuo vyno, jis paliepė Mehumanui, Biztai, Harbonai, Bigtai, Abagtai, Zetarui ir Karkasui ­ septyniems jam tarnavusiems eunuchams ­
Es 1:10 On the seventh day, when the heart of the king was merry with wine, he commanded Mehuman, Biztha, Harbona, Bigtha, and Abagtha, Zethar, and Carcas, the seven chamberlains that served in the presence of Ahasuerus the king,
Žyd 10:18 O kur jos atleistos, ten nebereikia aukos už nuodėmes.
He 10:18 Now where remission of these is, there is no more offering for sin.
Ts 20:27 Izraelitai klausė Viešpaties (nes tomis dienomis ten buvo Dievo Sandoros Skrynia,
Judg 20:27 And the children of Israel enquired of the LORD, (for the ark of the covenant of God was there in those days,
Jl 3:15 Saulė bus paversta tamsa, o mėnulis ­ krauju prieš ateinant didingajai ir baisiajai Viešpaties dienai.
Joe 3:15 The sun and the moon shall be darkened, and the stars shall withdraw their shining.
Neh 12:34 Judas, Benjaminas, Šemaja ir Jeremija
Ne 12:34 Judah, and Benjamin, and Shemaiah, and Jeremiah,
Ps 126:2 Kaip tuomet mes juokėmės, ir mūsų liežuvis netvėrė džiaugsmu! Tuomet buvo kalbama tautose: "Viešpats padarė jiems didžių dalykų! "
Ps 126:2 Then was our mouth filled with laughter, and our tongue with singing: then said they among the heathen, The LORD hath done great things for them.
Sk 7:34 ožys aukai už nuodėmę
Nu 7:34 One kid of the goats for a sin offering:
Joz 19:25 Jų žemė apėmė Helkatą, Halį, Beteną, Achšafą,
Jos 19:25 And their border was Helkath, and Hali, and Beten, and Achshaph,
Hab 1:5 "Pasižvalgykite po tautas ir įsidėmėkite! Stebėkitės ir apstulbkite! Juk jūsų dienomis vyksta dalykas, kuriuo netikėtumėte, jei ir būtų jums pasakyta.
Hab 1:5 Behold ye among the heathen, and regard, and wonder marvelously: for I will work a work in your days which ye will not believe, though it be told you.
Kun 4:16 Pateptasis kunigas atneš jaučio kraujo į Susitikimo Palapinę.
Le 4:16 And the priest that is anointed shall bring of the bullock's blood to the tabernacle of the congregation:
1Kar 22:2 Bet trečiais metais Judo karalius Juozapatas atvyko pas Izraelio karalių.
1Ki 22:2 And it came to pass in the third year, that Jehoshaphat the king of Judah came down to the king of Israel.
Kun 23:14 Iki tos dienos, kol nebūsite atnešę savo Dievo atnašos, nevalgysite nei duonos, nei pagruzdintų ar šviežių grūdų. Tai amžinas įstatas jūsų kartoms visose jūsų gyvenvietėse. ’
Le 23:14 And ye shall eat neither bread, nor parched corn, nor green ears, until the selfsame day that ye have brought an offering unto your God: it shall be a statute for ever throughout your generations in all your dwellings.
Pat 25:21 Jei tavo priešas alkanas, pavalgydink jį duona; jei ištroškęs, pagirdyk vandeniu;
Pr 25:21 If thine enemy be hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he be thirsty, give him water to drink:

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