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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Pat 20:23 Skirtingi svarsčiai pasibjaurėtini Viešpačiui, nesąžiningos svarstyklės yra negeros.
Pr 20:23 Divers weights are an abomination unto the LORD; and a false balance is not good.
Ez 5:12 Vienas tavo trečdalis mirs maru ir žus nuo bado, kitas trečdalis kris aplink tave nuo kalavijo, o dar vieną trečdalį išvėtysiu po visus vėjus ir išsitrauksiu kalaviją jiems įkandin.
Eze 5:12 A third part of thee shall die with the pestilence, and with famine shall they be consumed in the midst of thee: and a third part shall fall by the sword round about thee; and I will scatter a third part into all the winds, and I will draw out a sword after them.
Jok 2:12 Taip kalbėkite ir taip darykite, kaip tie, kurie bus teisiami pagal laisvės įstatymą.
Ja 2:12 So speak ye, and so do, as they that shall be judged by the law of liberty.
Ps 102:16 Viešpats atstatys Sionąir apsireikš savo garbėje.
Ps 102:16 When the LORD shall build up Zion, he shall appear in his glory.
Job 5:25 Matysi, kad tavo palikuonys dauginasiir tavo ainija auga kaip žolė laukuose.
Job 5:25 Thou shalt know also that thy seed shall be great, and thine offspring as the grass of the earth.
2Kar 23:29 Jo dienomis Egipto karalius faraonas Nekojas leidosi į žygį prieš Asirijos karalių Eufrato upės link. Karalius Jošijas išžygiavo užkirsti jam kelią, bet, susidūręs su juo mūšyje prie Megido, buvo užmuštas.
2Ki 23:29 In his days Pharaohnechoh king of Egypt went up against the king of Assyria to the river Euphrates: and king Josiah went against him; and he slew him at Megiddo, when he had seen him.
Jn 16:5 Dabar išeinu pas tą, kuris mane yra siuntęs, ir niekas iš jūsų neklausia: ‘Kur tu eini? ’Aš jums to nesakiau iš pradžių, nes buvau su jumis.
Jo 16:5 But now I go my way to him that sent me; and none of you asketh me, Whither goest thou?
2Kar 17:12 ir garbino stabus, apie kuriuos Viešpats buvo jiems pasakęs: "Jūs to nedarysite! "
2Ki 17:12 For they served idols, whereof the LORD had said unto them, Ye shall not do this thing.
Ez 1:16 Ratai žėrėjo tarsi būtų padaryti iš chrizolito. Visi keturi buvo to pat pavidalo: iš išvaizdos ir sąrangos atrodė, tartum ratas būtų buvęs rato viduje.
Eze 1:16 The appearance of the wheels and their work was like unto the colour of a beryl: and they four had one likeness: and their appearance and their work was as it were a wheel in the middle of a wheel.
2Sam 22:28 Juk tu gelbsti nuolankiuosius, bet su panieka žiūri į išdidžiuosius.
2Sa 22:28 And the afflicted people thou wilt save: but thine eyes are upon the haughty, that thou mayest bring them down.
Pat 5:15 Gerk vandenį iš savo talpyklos, šviežią vandenį iš savo šaltinio.
Pr 5:15 Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and running waters out of thine own well.
2Krn 32:16 Jo pareigūnai kalbėjo ir toliau prieš Viešpatį Dievą ir prieš jo tarną Ezekiją.
2Ch 32:16 And his servants spake yet more against the LORD God, and against his servant Hezekiah.
Iz 55:12 Taip! Džiaugsmo kupina širdimi išeisiteir būsite saugiai vedami į namus. Kalnai ir kalvos, jus išvydę, pratrūks džiaugsmo giesme, visi medžiai laukuose ims jums ploti.
Isa 55:12 For ye shall go out with joy, and be led forth with peace: the mountains and the hills shall break forth before you into singing, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands.
Lk 7:24 Jono pasiuntiniams nuėjus, Jėzus pradėjo kalbėti minioms apie Joną: "Ko išėjote į dykumą pažiūrėti? Ar vėjo linguojamos nendrės?
Lu 7:24 And when the messengers of John were departed, he began to speak unto the people concerning John, What went ye out into the wilderness for to see? A reed shaken with the wind?
Gg 8:10 [Ji: ] Aš siena, o mano krūtys kaip bokštai, todėl jo akyse radau tikrą ramybę.
SS 8:10 I am a wall, and my breasts like towers: then was I in his eyes as one that found favour.
Mt 23:39 Taigi aš jums sakau: nuo dabar jūs manęs nebematysite, kol netarsite: Garbė tam, kuris ateina Viešpaties vardu! "
Mat 23:39 For I say unto you, Ye shall not see me henceforth, till ye shall say, Blessed is he that cometh in the name of the Lord.
Jer 38:19 Karalius Zedekijas tarė Jeremijui: "Baiminuosi dėl perbėgusių pas chaldėjus judėjų, nes galiu būti jiems išduotas, ir jie su manimi blogai pasielgs. "
Jer 38:19 And Zedekiah the king said unto Jeremiah, I am afraid of the Jews that are fallen to the Chaldeans, lest they deliver me into their hand, and they mock me.
1Sam 28:22 Dabar prašyčiau, kad ir tu paklausytum savo tarnaitės balso. Leisk man padėti prieš tave riekę duonos. Valgyk, kad turėtumei jėgų eiti savo keliu. "
1Sa 28:22 Now therefore, I pray thee, hearken thou also unto the voice of thine handmaid, and let me set a morsel of bread before thee; and eat, that thou mayest have strength, when thou goest on thy way.
Ez 43:11 Kai jie susigės dėl viso, ką padarė, supažindink juos su šventyklos sąranga, įrengimu, išėjimais ir įėjimais, su visa jos sąranga, su visais jos sąrangą nusakančiais įstatais ir nurodymais. Surašyk tai jiems matant, kad jie ištikimai laikytųsi visos jos sąrangos ir visų jos nuostatų.
Eze 43:11 And if they be ashamed of all that they have done, shew them the form of the house, and the fashion thereof, and the goings out thereof, and the comings in thereof, and all the forms thereof, and all the ordinances thereof, and all the forms thereof, and all the laws thereof: and write it in their sight, that they may keep the whole form thereof, and all the ordinances thereof, and do them.
Ez 25:13 taip kalba Viešpats DIEVAS: ‘Ištiesiu savo ranką prieš Edomą, išnaikinsiu jo žmones bei gyvulius ir paversiu jį griuvėsiais; nuo Temano ligi pat Dedano kris jie nuo kalavijo.
Eze 25:13 Therefore thus saith the Lord GOD; I will also stretch out mine hand upon Edom, and will cut off man and beast from it; and I will make it desolate from Teman; and they of Dedan shall fall by the sword.

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