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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Joz 13:4 pietuose, be to, visas kanaaniečių kraštas nuo sidoniečių Mearos iki Afeko prie amoritų ribos,
Jos 13:4 From the south, all the land of the Canaanites, and Mearah that is beside the Sidonians unto Aphek, to the borders of the Amorites:
Kun 14:17 Keletą lašų ant jo delno likusio aliejaus kunigas užteps žmogui, kuris turi būti apvalytas, ant dešinės ausies lezgelio, dešinės rankos nykščio ir dešinės kojos nykščio viršum kraujo atnašos už kaltę.
Le 14:17 And of the rest of the oil that is in his hand shall the priest put upon the tip of the right ear of him that is to be cleansed, and upon the thumb of his right hand, and upon the great toe of his right foot, upon the blood of the trespass offering:
Ez 48:33 Pietiniame pakraštyje, kuris bus keturių tūkstančių penkių šimtų uolekčių ilgio, bus treji vartai: vieneri Simeono vartai, vieneri Isacharo vartai ir vieneri Zabulono vartai.
Eze 48:33 And at the south side four thousand and five hundred measures: and three gates; one gate of Simeon, one gate of Issachar, one gate of Zebulun.
2Kor 8:8 Aš tai sakau ne liepdamas, bet norėdamas kitų uolumo mastu patikrinti ir jūsų meilės nuoširdumą.
2C 8:8 I speak not by commandment, but by occasion of the forwardness of others, and to prove the sincerity of your love.
Apd 2:2 Staiga iš dangaus pasigirdo ūžesys, tarsi pūstų smarkus vėjas. Jis pripildė visą namą, kur jie sėdėjo.
Ac 2:2 And suddenly there came a sound from heaven as of a rushing mighty wind, and it filled all the house where they were sitting.
Mt 22:41 Kol fariziejai tebebuvo susirinkę, Jėzus juos paklausė:
Mat 22:41 While the Pharisees were gathered together, Jesus asked them,
Mt 20:26 Tarp jūsų to nebus. Jei kas norėtų tapti didžiausias iš jūsų, tebūnie jūsų tarnas,
Mat 20:26 But it shall not be so among you: but whosoever will be great among you, let him be your minister;
Dan 9:16 Viešpatie, kaip dera tavo dideliam teisumui, tenusigręžia tavo įniršęs pyktis nuo tavo miesto Jeruzalės, nuo tavo šventojo kalno! Dėl mūsų nuodėmių ir mūsų protėvių kalčių Jeruzalė ir tavo tauta tapo pajuoka visiems mūsų kaimynams.
Da 9:16 O LORD, according to all thy righteousness, I beseech thee, let thine anger and thy fury be turned away from thy city Jerusalem, thy holy mountain: because for our sins, and for the iniquities of our fathers, Jerusalem and thy people are become a reproach to all that are about us.
Jn 8:20 Tuos žodžius jis pasakė, mokydamas šventyklos iždinėje. Ir niekas jo nesuėmė, nes dar nebuvo atėjusi jo valanda.
Jo 8:20 These words spake Jesus in the treasury, as he taught in the temple: and no man laid hands on him; for his hour was not yet come.
Įst 32:1 "Klausykitės, dangūs, leiskite man kalbėti, tegirdi žemė mano lūpų žodžius!
De 32:1 Give ear, O ye heavens, and I will speak; and hear, O earth, the words of my mouth.
Pr 17:8 Tau ir tavo palikuonims po tavęs duosiu kraštą, kuriame gyveni kaip ateivis, visą Kanaano kraštą kaip amžiną nuosavybę. Aš būsiu jų Dievas. "
Ge 17:8 And I will give unto thee, and to thy seed after thee, the land wherein thou art a stranger, all the land of Canaan, for an everlasting possession; and I will be their God.
1Sam 24:2 Tada Saulius, pasiėmęs iš viso Izraelio tris tūkstančius rinktinių vyrų, išėjo ieškoti Dovydo bei jo vyrų Laukinių ožkų uolų kryptimi.
1Sa 24:2 Then Saul took three thousand chosen men out of all Israel, and went to seek David and his men upon the rocks of the wild goats.
Job 6:19 Karavanai iš Temos jų ieško, vilkstinės iš Šebos jų viliasi.
Job 6:19 The troops of Tema looked, the companies of Sheba waited for them.
Pat 17:7 Kilnūs žodžiai netinka kvailajam, juo labiau ­ melas kilmingajam!
Pr 17:7 Excellent speech becometh not a fool: much less do lying lips a prince.
Jn 16:19 Pamatęs, kad jie norėjo jį klausti, Jėzus tarė: "Klausinėjate vieni kitus, ką reiškia žodžiai: ‘Prabėgs valandėlė ­ ir manęs neregėsite, ir dar valandėlė ­ ir vėl mane pamatysite’?
Jo 16:19 Now Jesus knew that they were desirous to ask him, and said unto them, Do ye enquire among yourselves of that I said, A little while, and ye shall not see me: and again, a little while, and ye shall see me?
Lk 23:20 Norėdamas paleisti Jėzų, Pilotas dar kartą kreipėsi į juos,
Lu 23:20 Pilate therefore, willing to release Jesus, spake again to them.
Joz 15:22 Kina, Dimona, Adada,
Jos 15:22 And Kinah, and Dimonah, and Adadah,
Jer 3:23 Išties apgaulė ­ kalvose, klegesys ­ aukštumose! Tik Viešpatyje, mūsų Dieve, tėra Izraelio išganymas.
Jer 3:23 Truly in vain is salvation hoped for from the hills, and from the multitude of mountains: truly in the LORD our God is the salvation of Israel.
Mk 13:6 Daug kas ateis prisidengę mano vardu ir sakys: ‘Tai aš’, ­ ir daugelį suklaidins.
Mar 13:6 For many shall come in my name, saying, I am Christ; and shall deceive many.
Pr 27:1 Kai Izaokas jau buvo senas, o jo akys taip aptemusios, kad nebegalėjo matyti, jis pasišaukė savo vyresnįjį sūnų ir tarė jam: "Mano sūnau! " Šis atsiliepė: "Aš čia. "
Ge 27:1 And it came to pass, that when Isaac was old, and his eyes were dim, so that he could not see, he called Esau his eldest son, and said unto him, My son: and he said unto him, Behold, here am I.

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