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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Joz 13:21 taigi visus miestus, esančius plokščiakalnyje ir visą karalystę amoritų karaliaus Sihono, viešpatavusio Hešbone. (Mozė nugalėjo jį ir Midjano vadus ­ Evį, Rekemą, Cūrą, Hūrą ir Rebą, Sihono didžiūnus, įsikūrusius krašte.
Jos 13:21 And all the cities of the plain, and all the kingdom of Sihon king of the Amorites, which reigned in Heshbon, whom Moses smote with the princes of Midian, Evi, and Rekem, and Zur, and Hur, and Reba, which were dukes of Sihon, dwelling in the country.
Kun 26:18 Ir jei, to nepaisydami, manęs neklausysite, padidinsiu bausmę už jūsų nuodėmes septyneriopai
Le 26:18 And if ye will not yet for all this hearken unto me, then I will punish you seven times more for your sins.
Ezd 9:2 Jie paėmė jų dukteris žmonomis sau ir savo sūnums. Taigi šventoji sėkla susimaišė su šalies tautomis. Iš tikrųjų pareigūnai ir vadai pirmi taip nusižengė. "
Ezr 9:2 For they have taken of their daughters for themselves, and for their sons: so that the holy seed have mingled themselves with the people of those lands: yea, the hand of the princes and rulers hath been chief in this trespass.
Iš 22:19 Kas sueina su gyvuliu, turi būti nubaustas mirtimi.
Ex 22:19 Whosoever lieth with a beast shall surely be put to death.
Ps 85:2 Tu atleidi savo tautos kaltę, sunaikini visas jų nuodėmes. Sela.
Ps 85:2 Thou hast forgiven the iniquity of thy people, thou hast covered all their sin. Selah.
2Sam 22:45 Svetimšaliai atėjo pas mane gūždamiesi ir, vos apie mane išgirdę, reiškė pagarbą.
2Sa 22:45 Strangers shall submit themselves unto me: as soon as they hear, they shall be obedient unto me.
Pat 13:2 Iš savo žodžių vaisių žmogus valgo gerą valgį, o apgaulingas žmogus alksta darydamas niekšybes.
Pr 13:2 A man shall eat good by the fruit of his mouth: but the soul of the transgressors shall eat violence.
1Kar 3:11 Dievas tarė jam: "Kadangi to prašei, neprašei nei ilgo gyvenimo ir turtų sau, neprašei nei savo priešų gyvasties, bet prašei sau imlaus įžvalgumo, kad galėtumei žinoti, kas teisinga,
1Ki 3:11 And God said unto him, Because thou hast asked this thing, and hast not asked for thyself long life; neither hast asked riches for thyself, nor hast asked the life of thine enemies; but hast asked for thyself understanding to discern judgment;
Lk 20:37 O kad mirusieji prisikels, mini ir Mozė pasakojime apie krūmą, kur jis Viešpatį vadina Abraomo Dievu, Izaoko Dievu ir Jokūbo Dievu.
Lu 20:37 Now that the dead are raised, even Moses shewed at the bush, when he calleth the Lord the God of Abraham, and the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob.
Ez 40:43 Viduje visur aplinkui buvo pritvirtinti plaštakos pločio kabliai, o ant stalų turėjo būti kraunama aukų mėsa.
Eze 40:43 And within were hooks, an hand broad, fastened round about: and upon the tables was the flesh of the offering.
Pr 18:5 Atnešiu kąsnį duonos, kad galėtumėte pasistiprinti. Po to galėsite toliau eiti, nes juk užsukote pas savo tarną. " Jie atsakė: "Daryk, kaip sakai. "
Ge 18:5 And I will fetch a morsel of bread, and comfort ye your hearts; after that ye shall pass on: for therefore are ye come to your servant. And they said, So do, as thou hast said.
Mt 25:12 O jis atsakė: ‘Iš tiesų sakau jums: aš jūsų nepažįstu! ’
Mat 25:12 But he answered and said, Verily I say unto you, I know you not.
Ps 24:4 Tas, kurio rankos nekaltos ir širdis tyra, kuris netrokšta tuštybiųir apgaulingai neprisiekinėja artimui.
Ps 24:4 He that hath clean hands, and a pure heart; who hath not lifted up his soul unto vanity, nor sworn deceitfully.
Jer 48:25 "Moabo ragas nulaužtas, jo ranka sutriuškinta", ­ tai Viešpaties žodis.
Jer 48:25 The horn of Moab is cut off, and his arm is broken, saith the LORD.
Mk 13:28 Pasimokykite iš palyginimo su figos medžiu: kai jo šaka suminkštėja ir sprogsta lapai, jūs žinote, jog artinasi vasara.
Mar 13:28 Now learn a parable of the fig tree; When her branch is yet tender, and putteth forth leaves, ye know that summer is near:
Zch 2:8 Juk taip kalba Galybių Viešpats, po to, kai jo Šlovė pasiuntė mane, apie jus apiplėšusias tautas: ‘Kas tik užgauna jus, tas užgauna mano akies vyzdį.
Zec 2:8 For thus saith the LORD of hosts; After the glory hath he sent me unto the nations which spoiled you: for he that toucheth you toucheth the apple of his eye.
Jer 51:16 Jam sugriaudus, kyla vandenų sąmyšis danguje, jis pakelia garus nuo žemės pakraščių, lietų pripildo žaibų, vėją paleidžia iš savo svirnų.
Jer 51:16 When he uttereth his voice, there is a multitude of waters in the heavens; and he causeth the vapours to ascend from the ends of the earth: he maketh lightnings with rain, and bringeth forth the wind out of his treasures.
Rom 11:12 Bet jeigu jų suklupimas reiškia pasaulio praturtinimą, o jų mažas skaičius ­ pagonių praturtėjimą, tai ką duos jų visuma? !
Ro 11:12 Now if the fall of them be the riches of the world, and the diminishing of them the riches of the Gentiles; how much more their fulness?
Pr 23:13 ir tarė Efronui, girdint visiems krašto gyventojams: "O, kad tu manęs paklausytum! Aš duosiu tau lauko kainą. Priimk ją iš manęs, kad galėčiau ten palaidoti savo mirusiąją. "
Ge 23:13 And he spake unto Ephron in the audience of the people of the land, saying, But if thou wilt give it, I pray thee, hear me: I will give thee money for the field; take it of me, and I will bury my dead there.
2Krn 10:10 Jaunieji vyrai, kartu su juo augę, atsakė jam: "Taip turi kalbėti žmonėms, kurie tau sakė: ‘Tavo tėvas padarė mūsų jungą sunkų, bet tu turi jį mums palengvinti. ’ Pasakyk jiems: ‘Mano mažylis pirštas storesnis už mano tėvo juosmenį.
2Ch 10:10 And the young men that were brought up with him spake unto him, saying, Thus shalt thou answer the people that spake unto thee, saying, Thy father made our yoke heavy, but make thou it somewhat lighter for us; thus shalt thou say unto them, My little finger shall be thicker than my father's loins.

Sanctus Corpus Deus