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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Iš 14:8 Viešpats sukietino faraono, Egipto karaliaus, širdį, ir jis vijosi izraelitus. Izraelitai drąsiai žygiavo tolyn,
Ex 14:8 And the LORD hardened the heart of Pharaoh king of Egypt, and he pursued after the children of Israel: and the children of Israel went out with an high hand.
Pr 7:6 Nojus buvo šešių šimtų metų, kai užėjo tvanas, ir vandenys užliejo žemę.
Ge 7:6 And Noah was six hundred years old when the flood of waters was upon the earth.
2Sam 21:7 Karalius pasigailėjo Sauliaus sūnaus Jehonatano sūnaus Mefi Bošeto dėl priesaikos tarp jų Viešpaties akivaizdoje, tarp Dovydo ir Sauliaus sūnaus Jehonatano.
2Sa 21:7 But the king spared Mephibosheth, the son of Jonathan the son of Saul, because of the LORD's oath that was between them, between David and Jonathan the son of Saul.
1Kor 12:4 Esama skirtingų malonės dovanų, tačiau ta pati Dvasia.
1C 12:4 Now there are diversities of gifts, but the same Spirit.
Mt 28:18 Tuomet prisiartinęs Jėzus prabilo: "Man duota visa valdžia danguje ir žemėje.
Mat 28:18 And Jesus came and spake unto them, saying, All power is given unto me in heaven and in earth.
Jn 1:5 Šviesa spindi tamsoje, ir tamsa jos neužgožė.
Jo 1:5 And the light shineth in darkness; and the darkness comprehended it not.
2Kor 6:15 Kaipgi galima gretinti Kristų su Beliaru arba tikintį su netikinčiu?
2C 6:15 And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?
Ts 13:9 Dievas išklausė Manoacho, ir Dievo angelas vėl atėjo pas moterį. Ji sėdėjo lauke, bet jos vyro Manoacho nebuvo su ja.
Judg 13:9 And God hearkened to the voice of Manoah; and the angel of God came again unto the woman as she sat in the field: but Manoah her husband was not with her.
Ef 2:19 Vadinasi, jūs jau nebesate ateiviai nei svetimi, bet šventųjų bendrapiliečiai ir Dievo namiškiai,
Ep 2:19 Now therefore ye are no more strangers and foreigners, but fellowcitizens with the saints, and of the household of God;
Įst 32:1 "Klausykitės, dangūs, leiskite man kalbėti, tegirdi žemė mano lūpų žodžius!
De 32:1 Give ear, O ye heavens, and I will speak; and hear, O earth, the words of my mouth.
Sk 16:50 Kai maras buvo sutramdytas, Aaronas sugrįžo pas Mozę prie Susitikimo Palapinės įėjimo.
Nu 16:50 And Aaron returned unto Moses unto the door of the tabernacle of the congregation: and the plague was stayed.
Job 40:9 Argi tavo ranka kaip Dievoir gali griausti tokiu balsu kaip jis?
Job 40:9 Hast thou an arm like God? or canst thou thunder with a voice like him?
Apd 2:37 Tie žodžiai verte vėrė jiems širdį, ir jie ėmė klausinėti Petrą bei kitus apaštalus: "Ką mums daryti, broliai? "
Ac 2:37 Now when they heard this, they were pricked in their heart, and said unto Peter and to the rest of the apostles, Men and brethren, what shall we do?
Mch 6:13 Todėl aš tave ir parbloškiau, nuniokodamas dėl tavo nuodėmių.
Mic 6:13 Therefore also will I make thee sick in smiting thee, in making thee desolate because of thy sins.
Joz 12:12 Eglono karalius ­ vienas, Gezero karalius ­ vienas,
Jos 12:12 The king of Eglon, one; the king of Gezer, one;
Rut 4:13 Taigi Boazas vedė Rūtą, ir ji tapo jo žmona. Taip jis pradėjo su ja vedybinį gyvenimą. Viešpats leido jai tapti nėščiai, ir ji pagimdė sūnų.
Ru 4:13 So Boaz took Ruth, and she was his wife: and when he went in unto her, the LORD gave her conception, and she bare a son.
1Sam 4:19 Jo marti, Finehaso žmona, buvo nėščia ir turėjo netrukus gimdyti. Išgirdusi žinią, kad Dievo Skrynia paimta į nelaisvę, kad jos uošvis ir vyras mirę, ji buvo apimta gimdymo skausmų, prigludo prie žemės ir pagimdė.
1Sa 4:19 And his daughter in law, Phinehas' wife, was with child, near to be delivered: and when she heard the tidings that the ark of God was taken, and that her father in law and her husband were dead, she bowed herself and travailed; for her pains came upon her.
Pat 22:13 Tinginys sako: "Liūtas lauke! Jeigu išeisiu į gatvę, būsiu sudraskytas! "
Pr 22:13 The slothful man saith, There is a lion without, I shall be slain in the streets.
Įst 29:2 Mozė sušaukė visą Izraelį ir tarė: "Jūs matėte visa, ką Viešpats padarė jūsų akyse Egipto žemėje faraonui, visiems jo dvariškiams ir visam jo kraštui,
De 29:2 And Moses called unto all Israel, and said unto them, Ye have seen all that the LORD did before your eyes in the land of Egypt unto Pharaoh, and unto all his servants, and unto all his land;
1Sam 11:13 Bet Saulius atsakė: "Šiandien nė vienas nebus nubaustas mirtimi, nes šiandien Viešpats suteikė Izraeliui išgelbėjimą. "
1Sa 11:13 And Saul said, There shall not a man be put to death this day: for to day the LORD hath wrought salvation in Israel.

Sanctus Corpus Deus