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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Apr 1:10 Aš turėjau dvasios pagavą Viešpaties dieną ir išgirdau sau už nugaros galingą balsą, tarsi trimitą,
Re 1:10 I was in the Spirit on the Lord's day, and heard behind me a great voice, as of a trumpet,
Pr 38:2 Ten jis pamatė vieno kanaaniečio, vardu Šūva, dukterį, vedė ir su ja gyveno.
Ge 38:2 And Judah saw there a daughter of a certain Canaanite, whose name was Shuah; and he took her, and went in unto her.
Jer 22:17 O tavo akims ir širdžiai rūpi vien ieškoti naudos, tiktai lieti nekaltųjų kraują, prievartauti ir smurtauti. "
Jer 22:17 But thine eyes and thine heart are not but for thy covetousness, and for to shed innocent blood, and for oppression, and for violence, to do it.
Mt 14:10 Jis pasiuntė [budelį], kad nukirstų kalėjime Jonui galvą.
Mat 14:10 And he sent, and beheaded John in the prison.
1Sam 29:4 Filistinų vadai pyko ant jo. "Siųsk tą vyrą atgal, ­ sakė jam filistinų vadai, ­ tegrįžta į vietą, kurią esi jam paskyręs. Į mūšį jis su mumis nežygiuos, antraip mūšyje gali tapti mums priešu. Juk kaip kitaip galėtų šis vyrukas atgauti savo valdovo malonę? Ar ne šių vyrų galvomis?
1Sa 29:4 And the princes of the Philistines were wroth with him; and the princes of the Philistines said unto him, Make this fellow return, that he may go again to his place which thou hast appointed him, and let him not go down with us to battle, lest in the battle he be an adversary to us: for wherewith should he reconcile himself unto his master? should it not be with the heads of these men?
Mch 3:9 Tad išklausykite tai, Jokūbo namų valdovaiir Izraelio namų vadai! Jūs neapkenčiate teisingumoir iškraipote visa, kas tiesu!
Mic 3:9 Hear this, I pray you, ye heads of the house of Jacob, and princes of the house of Israel, that abhor judgment, and pervert all equity.
2Kar 9:7 Tu sunaikinsi savo valdovo Ahabo namus. Taip aš atkeršysiu Jezabelei už savo tarnų pranašų ir už visų Viešpaties tarnų kraują.
2Ki 9:7 And thou shalt smite the house of Ahab thy master, that I may avenge the blood of my servants the prophets, and the blood of all the servants of the LORD, at the hand of Jezebel.
1Jn 1:1 Kas buvo nuo pradžios, ką girdėjome ir savo akimis regėjome, ką patyrėme ir mūsų rankos lietė, tai skelbiame apie gyvenimo Žodį.
1J 1:1 That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked upon, and our hands have handled, of the Word of life;
Koh 5:5 Geriau įžado visai neduoti, negu duoti ir nevykdyti.
Ec 5:5 Better is it that thou shouldest not vow, than that thou shouldest vow and not pay.
2Kar 22:19 kadangi tavo širdis nusigando ir tu nusižeminai prieš Viešpatį, išgirdęs, kad aš nutariau paversti šią vietą su jos gyventojais siaubu ir prakeikimu, ir kadangi persiplėšei drabužius, verkdamas mano akivaizdoje, išgirdau ir aš tave. Tai Viešpaties žodis!
2Ki 22:19 Because thine heart was tender, and thou hast humbled thyself before the LORD, when thou heardest what I spake against this place, and against the inhabitants thereof, that they should become a desolation and a curse, and hast rent thy clothes, and wept before me; I also have heard thee, saith the LORD.
Jn 6:55 Mano kūnas tikrai yra valgis, ir mano kraujas tikrai yra gėrimas.
Jo 6:55 For my flesh is meat indeed, and my blood is drink indeed.
2Krn 5:3 Visi izraelitai suėjo pas karalių per septinto mėnesio iškilmes .
2Ch 5:3 Wherefore all the men of Israel assembled themselves unto the king in the feast which was in the seventh month.
Pr 5:29 Jis pavadino jį Nojumi, tardamas: "Iš tos pačios žemės, kurią Viešpats prakeikė, šis atneš mums atgaivos nuo mūsų darbų ir mūsų rankų triūso. "
Ge 5:29 And he called his name Noah, saying, This same shall comfort us concerning our work and toil of our hands, because of the ground which the LORD hath cursed.
Am 9:10 Nuo kalavijo žusvisi mano tautos nusidėjėliai, sakantys: ‘Nelaimė niekadamūsų nepasivys ir nepasitiks. ’
Am 9:10 All the sinners of my people shall die by the sword, which say, The evil shall not overtake nor prevent us.
Apr 15:1 Aš pamačiau danguje dar vieną didį ir nuostabų ženklą: septynis angelus, turinčius septynias paskutines negandas, nes jomis išsibaigia Dievo rūstybė.
Re 15:1 And I saw another sign in heaven, great and marvellous, seven angels having the seven last plagues; for in them is filled up the wrath of God.
Iz 28:15 Kadangi sakote: "Sandorą sudarėme su mirtimi, sutartį sudarėme su Šeolu; atšniokštęs nuožmusis tvanasmūsų nepasieks, nes mele radome prieglaudą, apgaulėje ­ slėptuvę. "
Isa 28:15 Because ye have said, We have made a covenant with death, and with hell are we at agreement; when the overflowing scourge shall pass through, it shall not come unto us: for we have made lies our refuge, and under falsehood have we hid ourselves:
Neh 10:22 Pelatija, Hananas, Anaja,
Ne 10:22 Pelatiah, Hanan, Anaiah,
Ez 32:3 Taip kalba Viešpats DIEVAS: "Užmesiu ant tavęs savo tinklądaugelio tautų suėjime, ir jie ištrauks tave mano bradiniu.
Eze 32:3 Thus saith the Lord GOD; I will therefore spread out my net over thee with a company of many people; and they shall bring thee up in my net.
Est 2:10 Estera nei savo tautybės, nei šeimos neatskleidė, nes Mordechajas buvo uždraudęs tai daryti.
Es 2:10 Esther had not shewed her people nor her kindred: for Mordecai had charged her that she should not shew it.
Iz 36:15 Neleiskite Ezekijui, kad jus sugundytų, liepdamas pasitikėti Viešpačiu ir sakyti: ‘Viešpats tikrai išgelbės mus! Šis miestas nebus atiduotas Asirijos karaliui į rankas! ’
Isa 36:15 Neither let Hezekiah make you trust in the LORD, saying, The LORD will surely deliver us: this city shall not be delivered into the hand of the king of Assyria.

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