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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Neh 2:6 Karalienei sėdint šalia jo, karalius tarė man: "Kiek ilgai užtruksi kelionėje ir kada sugrįši? " Taigi karaliui buvo malonu mane pasiųsti, ir aš nurodžiau jam laiką.
Ne 2:6 And the king said unto me, (the queen also sitting by him,) For how long shall thy journey be? and when wilt thou return? So it pleased the king to send me; and I set him a time.
Jl 2:26 Jūs valgysite ir būsite sotūs, šlovinsite vardą Viešpaties, savo Dievo, kuris taip nuostabiai pasielgė su jumis. Mano tauta nebebus sugėdinta per amžius.
Joe 2:26 And ye shall eat in plenty, and be satisfied, and praise the name of the LORD your God, that hath dealt wondrously with you: and my people shall never be ashamed.
Ts 6:7 Izraelitams šaukiantis Viešpaties dėl midjaniečių,
Judg 6:7 And it came to pass, when the children of Israel cried unto the LORD because of the Midianites,
Ez 46:14 Kas rytą parūpinsi prie jo ir javų atnašų ­ šeštadalį efos ir trečdalį hino aliejaus, kuris turi būti sumaišytas su geriausiais miltais kaip javų auka Viešpačiui. Tai amžini įstatai.
Eze 46:14 And thou shalt prepare a meat offering for it every morning, the sixth part of an ephah, and the third part of an hin of oil, to temper with the fine flour; a meat offering continually by a perpetual ordinance unto the LORD.
Est 2:17 Karalius pamilo Esterą labiau už visas kitas moteris; ji įgijo jo malonę ir palankumą labiau, negu visos kitos mergelės. Tad jis uždėjo jai ant galvos karališką vainiką ir padarė ją karaliene vietoj Vaštės.
Es 2:17 And the king loved Esther above all the women, and she obtained grace and favour in his sight more than all the virgins; so that he set the royal crown upon her head, and made her queen instead of Vashti.
1Jn 3:5 Jūs žinote, jog Jėzus pasirodė, kad sunaikintų nuodėmes, ir nėra jame nuodėmės.
1J 3:5 And ye know that he was manifested to take away our sins; and in him is no sin.
Ez 30:8 Kai užkursiu ugnį Egipteir visi jo rėmėjai bus sutriuškinti, jie žinos, kad aš esu Viešpats.
Eze 30:8 And they shall know that I am the LORD, when I have set a fire in Egypt, and when all her helpers shall be destroyed.
Job 34:22 Nėra tamsos ar juodos nakties, kurioje galėtų slėptis nedorėliai.
Job 34:22 There is no darkness, nor shadow of death, where the workers of iniquity may hide themselves.
Job 5:22 Iš žūties ir bado juoksiesi, žemės žvėrių nebebijosi.
Job 5:22 At destruction and famine thou shalt laugh: neither shalt thou be afraid of the beasts of the earth.
Ps 49:4 Telksiuos į išminties posakįir, skambindamas arfa, aiškinsiu jo mįslę.
Ps 49:4 I will incline mine ear to a parable: I will open my dark saying upon the harp.
Iz 38:3 "Atmink, meldžiu, Viešpatie, kaip ištikimai ir nuoširdžiai elgiausi tavo akivaizdoje, darydamas, kas tau patinka! " Ir ėmė Ezekijas graudžiai verkti.
Isa 38:3 And said, Remember now, O LORD, I beseech thee, how I have walked before thee in truth and with a perfect heart, and have done that which is good in thy sight. And Hezekiah wept sore.
Ez 32:15 Kai paversiu Egipto žemę tyrais, kai kraštas neteks viso, kas jame yra, ir kai parblokšiu jo gyventojus, jie žinos, kad aš esu Viešpats.
Eze 32:15 When I shall make the land of Egypt desolate, and the country shall be destitute of that whereof it was full, when I shall smite all them that dwell therein, then shall they know that I am the LORD.
Žyd 7:14 Aišku, kad mūsų Viešpats buvo kilęs iš Judo giminės, apie kurios kunigus Mozė nieko nėra kalbėjęs.
He 7:14 For it is evident that our Lord sprang out of Juda; of which tribe Moses spake nothing concerning priesthood.
Ts 11:18 Tada jie keliavo per dykumą, aplenkdami Edomo kraštą bei Moabo kraštą, ėjo palei rytinę Moabo krašto ribą, kol įsirengė stovyklą kitoje Arnono pusėje. Į Moabo žemę jie niekada neįžengė, nes Arnonas buvo Moabo riba.
Judg 11:18 Then they went along through the wilderness, and compassed the land of Edom, and the land of Moab, and came by the east side of the land of Moab, and pitched on the other side of Arnon, but came not within the border of Moab: for Arnon was the border of Moab.
Ez 25:15 Taip kalba Viešpats DIEVAS: "Kadangi filistinai elgėsi kerštingai ir kerštavo visa širdimi, norėdami sunaikinti iš senos neapykantos, ­
Eze 25:15 Thus saith the Lord GOD; Because the Philistines have dealt by revenge, and have taken vengeance with a despiteful heart, to destroy it for the old hatred;
1Kar 4:34 Saliamono klausytis atvykdavo iš visų kraštų žmonės, siunčiami visų žemės karalių, išgirdusių apie jo išmintį.
1Ki 4:34 And there came of all people to hear the wisdom of Solomon, from all kings of the earth, which had heard of his wisdom.
Pr 24:23 "Prašyčiau pasakyti, ­ klausė jis, ­ kieno tu duktė? Ar yra vietos tavo tėvo namuose mums pernakvoti? "
Ge 24:23 And said, Whose daughter art thou? tell me, I pray thee: is there room in thy father's house for us to lodge in?
Iš 13:11 Kai Viešpats įves tave į kanaaniečių kraštą, kaip buvo prisiekęs tau ir tavo protėviams, ir atiduos jį tau,
Ex 13:11 And it shall be when the LORD shall bring thee into the land of the Canaanites, as he sware unto thee and to thy fathers, and shall give it thee,
Ps 56:2 Mano priešai puola mane visą dieną; daug puolančių mane, Aukščiausiasis.
Ps 56:2 Mine enemies would daily swallow me up: for they be many that fight against me, O thou most High.
Iš 33:12 Mozė tarė Viešpačiui: "Štai tu man liepei: ‘Vesk į priekį šią tautą’, bet nepasakei, ką pasiųsi su manimi. Be to, tu sakei: ‘Aš pažįstu tave vardu, tu iš tikrųjų radai malonę mano akyse. ’
Ex 33:12 And Moses said unto the LORD, See, thou sayest unto me, Bring up this people: and thou hast not let me know whom thou wilt send with me. Yet thou hast said, I know thee by name, and thou hast also found grace in my sight.

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