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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Lk 11:5 Jėzus dar kalbėjo jiems: "Kas nors iš jūsų turės draugą ir, nuėjęs pas jį vidurnaktį, sakys: ‘Bičiuli, paskolink man tris kepaliukus duonos,
Lu 11:5 And he said unto them, Which of you shall have a friend, and shall go unto him at midnight, and say unto him, Friend, lend me three loaves;
2Krn 12:3 Jis atžygiavo su tūkstančiu dviem šimtais kovos vežimų ir šešiasdešimt tūkstančių raitelių. Nesuskaičiuojama kariuomenė atžygiavo su juo iš Egipto ­ libiai, sukijai ir kušitai.
2Ch 12:3 With twelve hundred chariots, and threescore thousand horsemen: and the people were without number that came with him out of Egypt; the Lubims, the Sukkiims, and the Ethiopians.
Job 42:3 ‘Kas temdo mano užmojį, kalbėdamas neapgalvotais žodžiais? ’Iš tikrųjų kalbėjau apie tai, ko nesupratau, apie dalykus, viršijančius mane savo nuostabumu, kurių neišmaniau.
Job 42:3 Who is he that hideth counsel without knowledge? therefore have I uttered that I understood not; things too wonderful for me, which I knew not.
2Kar 7:19 pareigūnas Dievo vyrui atsakė, tardamas: "Net jeigu Viešpats ir langus danguje atvertų, argi tai galėtų įvykti? " O Eliziejus buvo atkirtęs: "Savo akimis tai matysi, bet nevalgysi! "
2Ki 7:19 And that lord answered the man of God, and said, Now, behold, if the LORD should make windows in heaven, might such a thing be? And he said, Behold, thou shalt see it with thine eyes, but shalt not eat thereof.
Neh 7:61 O tai sugrįžusieji iš Tel Melacho, Tel Haršos, Kerub Adono ir Imero, bet negalėjusieji įrodyti, kad jų protėvių namai ar kilmė izraelitiška:
Ne 7:61 And these were they which went up also from Telmelah, Telharesha, Cherub, Addon, and Immer: but they could not shew their father's house, nor their seed, whether they were of Israel.
1Tim 4:14 Nepamiršk tavyje esančios malonės dovanos, kuri tau buvo suteikta pranašo ištarme kartu su vyresniųjų rankų uždėjimu.
1Ti 4:14 Neglect not the gift that is in thee, which was given thee by prophecy, with the laying on of the hands of the presbytery.
Apd 7:10 Jis išgelbėjo Juozapą iš visų vargų ir suteikė malonės bei išminties Egipto karaliaus ­ faraono akivaizdoje. Tas jį paskyrė Egipto ir visų savo namų valdytoju.
Ac 7:10 And delivered him out of all his afflictions, and gave him favour and wisdom in the sight of Pharaoh king of Egypt; and he made him governor over Egypt and all his house.
Žyd 8:2 kaip einantis kunigystės tarnybą šventojoje vietoje ir tikrojoje padangtėje, kurią pastatė ne žmogus, o Viešpats.
He 8:2 A minister of the sanctuary, and of the true tabernacle, which the Lord pitched, and not man.
Sk 3:39 Visų į sąrašą įtrauktų levitų, kuriuos Mozė ir Aaronas, vykdydami Viešpaties įsakymą, įtraukė pagal jų kiltis, visų vyrų vieno mėnesio ir vyresnių buvo dvidešimt du tūkstančiai.
Nu 3:39 All that were numbered of the Levites, which Moses and Aaron numbered at the commandment of the LORD, throughout their families, all the males from a month old and upward, were twenty and two thousand.
Pat 16:33 Burtai metami į sterblę, bet nuosprendis priklauso nuo Viešpaties.
Pr 16:33 The lot is cast into the lap; but the whole disposing thereof is of the LORD.
Joz 10:14 Nei prieš tai, nei po to nebuvo tokios dienos, kaip ši, Viešpačiui paklausius žmogaus balso! Tikrai Viešpats kovojo už Izraelį!
Jos 10:14 And there was no day like that before it or after it, that the LORD hearkened unto the voice of a man: for the LORD fought for Israel.
Ts 8:23 Gideonas atsakė jiems: "Nei aš jus valdysiu, nei mano sūnus jus valdys! Viešpats jus valdys! "
Judg 8:23 And Gideon said unto them, I will not rule over you, neither shall my son rule over you: the LORD shall rule over you.
Ps 140:9 Mane apspitusieji kelia galvas; ant jų pačių teužgriūva jų grasinimai!
Ps 140:9 As for the head of those that compass me about, let the mischief of their own lips cover them.
1Sam 24:7 Tais žodžiais Dovydas smarkiai sudraudė savo vyrus ir Sauliaus užpulti jiems neleido. Saulius paliko olą ir nuėjo savo keliu.
1Sa 24:7 So David stayed his servants with these words, and suffered them not to rise against Saul. But Saul rose up out of the cave, and went on his way.
Iš 14:29 O izraelitai perėjo per jūrą sausa žeme, vandenims sudarius sieną jiems iš dešinės ir iš kairės.
Ex 14:29 But the children of Israel walked upon dry land in the midst of the sea; and the waters were a wall unto them on their right hand, and on their left.
2Krn 16:10 Asa supyko ant regėtojo ir taip įtūžo, kad kalėjime įrakino jį į šiekštą. Tuo pačiu metu Asa žiauriai pasielgė ir su kai kuriais kitais žmonėmis.
2Ch 16:10 Then Asa was wroth with the seer, and put him in a prison house; for he was in a rage with him because of this thing. And Asa oppressed some of the people the same time.
Įst 3:5 Tie visi miestai buvo tvirtovės su aukštais mūrais, dvigubais vartais ir velkėmis, neskaitant didelio skaičiaus miestų be mūrų.
De 3:5 All these cities were fenced with high walls, gates, and bars; beside unwalled towns a great many.
Pat 7:23 kol strėlė neperveria jam vidurių. Jis tarsi paukštis, skubantis į kilpąir nežinantis, kad tai kainuos jam gyvastį.
Pr 7:23 Till a dart strike through his liver; as a bird hasteth to the snare, and knoweth not that it is for his life.
Dan 4:12 Jo lapai buvo gražūs pažiūrėti, vaisiai gausūs, ir maisto jame buvo visiems. Po juo laukų žvėrys rado paunksmę, jo šakose krovėsi lizdus padangių paukščiai, iš jo maitinosi visi gyvūnai.
Da 4:12 The leaves thereof were fair, and the fruit thereof much, and in it was meat for all: the beasts of the field had shadow under it, and the fowls of the heaven dwelt in the boughs thereof, and all flesh was fed of it.
2Sam 18:21 Tuomet Joabas tarė vienam kušitui: "Eik ir pranešk karaliui, ką matei. " Kušitas nusilenkė Joabui ir nubėgo.
2Sa 18:21 Then said Joab to Cushi, Go tell the king what thou hast seen. And Cushi bowed himself unto Joab, and ran.

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