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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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1Jn 3:6 Kas tik gyvena jame, tas nedaro nuodėmių, o nė vienas nusidėjėlis jo neregėjo ir nepažino.
1J 3:6 Whosoever abideth in him sinneth not: whosoever sinneth hath not seen him, neither known him.
2Kor 3:3 Jūs pasirodėte esą Kristaus laiškas, parengtas mūsų patarnavimu, surašytas ne rašalu, bet gyvojo Dievo Dvasia, ne akmens plokštėse, bet gyvų širdžių plokštėse.
2C 3:3 Forasmuch as ye are manifestly declared to be the epistle of Christ ministered by us, written not with ink, but with the Spirit of the living God; not in tables of stone, but in fleshy tables of the heart.
Job 20:6 Net jeigu ūgiu dangų pasiektųir galva debesis liestų,
Job 20:6 Though his excellency mount up to the heavens, and his head reach unto the clouds;
Ps 91:10 todėl neištiks tavęs žala, nepalies tavo palapinės nelaimė,
Ps 91:10 There shall no evil befall thee, neither shall any plague come nigh thy dwelling.
Joz 22:8 sakė: "Grįžtate į palapines labai turtingi ­ su labai daug galvijų, sidabro, aukso, vario bei geležies ir daugybe drabužių. Dalykitės priešų grobiu su savo giminaičiais. "
Jos 22:8 And he spake unto them, saying, Return with much riches unto your tents, and with very much cattle, with silver, and with gold, and with brass, and with iron, and with very much raiment: divide the spoil of your enemies with your brethren.
Ps 89:31 jei jie laužytų mano įstatusir nesilaikytų mano įsakymų,
Ps 89:31 If they break my statutes, and keep not my commandments;
Kun 27:10 Jis negali būti iškeistas ar pakeistas, nei geresnis į menkesnį, nei menkesnis į geresnį; jei gyvulys būtų pakeistas kitu, tuomet abu ­ pažadėtasis gyvulys ir jo pakaitalas ­ taps šventi.
Le 27:10 He shall not alter it, nor change it, a good for a bad, or a bad for a good: and if he shall at all change beast for beast, then it and the exchange thereof shall be holy.
Kun 25:51 Juo daugiau bus metų iki jubiliejaus, juo didesnę pirkimo kainą jis turės grąžinti kaip atpirkimą;
Le 25:51 If there be yet many years behind, according unto them he shall give again the price of his redemption out of the money that he was bought for.
Pr 22:12 "Nekelk rankos prieš berniuką, ­ tęsė, ­ nieko jam nedaryk! Dabar žinau, kad tu bijai Dievo, nes neatsisakei atiduoti man savo vienturtį sūnų. "
Ge 22:12 And he said, Lay not thine hand upon the lad, neither do thou any thing unto him: for now I know that thou fearest God, seeing thou hast not withheld thy son, thine only son from me.
1Sam 17:47 Visa ši bendrija žinos, kad Viešpats gali išgelbėti be kalavijo ir ieties, nes mūšis yra Viešpaties, ir jis atiduos jus mums į rankas! "
1Sa 17:47 And all this assembly shall know that the LORD saveth not with sword and spear: for the battle is the LORD's, and he will give you into our hands.
1Krn 6:77 Kitiems Merario palikuonims: iš Zabulono giminės ­ Rimonojas su ganyklomis, Taboras su ganyklomis;
1Ch 6:77 Unto the rest of the children of Merari were given out of the tribe of Zebulun, Rimmon with her suburbs, Tabor with her suburbs:
Lk 10:12 Sakau jums: ateis diena, kai Sodomai bus lengviau negu anam miestui.
Lu 10:12 But I say unto you, that it shall be more tolerable in that day for Sodom, than for that city.
1Krn 29:8 Kas tik turėjo brangakmenių, per Jehielio Geršono rankas atidavė juos Viešpaties Namų iždui.
1Ch 29:8 And they with whom precious stones were found gave them to the treasure of the house of the LORD, by the hand of Jehiel the Gershonite.
Lk 22:68 o jei paklausiu, man neatsakysite .
Lu 22:68 And if I also ask you, ye will not answer me, nor let me go.
Jer 13:3 Mane vėl pasiekė Viešpaties žodis:
Jer 13:3 And the word of the LORD came unto me the second time, saying,
Pat 5:8 Laikykis kuo toliau nuo jos, neik arti jos namų durų,
Pr 5:8 Remove thy way far from her, and come not nigh the door of her house:
Ps 64:2 Apgink mane nuo nedorėlių gaujos, nuo pikta darančių minios.
Ps 64:2 Hide me from the secret counsel of the wicked; from the insurrection of the workers of iniquity:
1Kar 18:20 Ahabas išsiuntė žmones pašaukti visų izraelitų ir surinko pranašus ant Karmelio kalno.
1Ki 18:20 So Ahab sent unto all the children of Israel, and gathered the prophets together unto mount Carmel.
Koh 3:9 Tad kokia nauda dirbančiajam iš jo triūso?
Ec 3:9 What profit hath he that worketh in that wherein he laboureth?
2Kar 4:41 Tada Eliziejus tarė: "Atneškite miltų. " Jis subėrė juos į puodą, tardamas: "Pilk žmonėms, tevalgo. " Puode nebebuvo nieko kenksmingo.
2Ki 4:41 But he said, Then bring meal. And he cast it into the pot; and he said, Pour out for the people, that they may eat. And there was no harm in the pot.

Sanctus Corpus Deus