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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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2Krn 19:8 Be to, Jeruzalėje Juozapatas paskyrė keletą levitų, kunigų ir Izraelio kilčių galvų teisti Viešpaties vardu ir spręsti bylas tarp Jeruzalės gyventojų.
2Ch 19:8 Moreover in Jerusalem did Jehoshaphat set of the Levites, and of the priests, and of the chief of the fathers of Israel, for the judgment of the LORD, and for controversies, when they returned to Jerusalem.
Apd 18:14 Pauliui besirengiant prabilti, Galionas tarė žydams: "Jei tai būtų koks nusikaltimas ar piktas darbas, aš, žydų vyrai, deramai ir kantriai jūsų paklausyčiau.
Ac 18:14 And when Paul was now about to open his mouth, Gallio said unto the Jews, If it were a matter of wrong or wicked lewdness, O ye Jews, reason would that I should bear with you:
Iš 39:23 Skylė galvai skraistės viduryje buvo kaip skylė šarvų liemenėje su atsiūlėjimu aplink skylę, idant nesuplyštų.
Ex 39:23 And there was an hole in the midst of the robe, as the hole of an habergeon, with a band round about the hole, that it should not rend.
Apd 8:37 Pilypas tarė: ‘Jei tiki iš visos širdies, tai galima. ’ Tas atsakė: ‘Tikiu, kad Jėzus Kristus yra Dievo Sūnus. ’
Ac 8:37 And Philip said, If thou believest with all thine heart, thou mayest. And he answered and said, I believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God.
Ps 130:4 Bet tu turi galią atleisti, kad tavęs pagarbiai bijotume.
Ps 130:4 But there is forgiveness with thee, that thou mayest be feared.
1Sam 26:22 Atsakydamas Dovydas tarė: "Štai ietis, o karaliau! Atsiųsk vaikiną jos paimti.
1Sa 26:22 And David answered and said, Behold the king's spear! and let one of the young men come over and fetch it.
2Kar 23:4 Tada karalius įsakė vyriausiajam kunigui Hilkijui, jo pavaduotojams kunigams ir slenksčio sargams išnešti iš Viešpaties Namų visus reikmenis, padarytus Baalui, Ašerai ir visoms dangaus galybėms. Sudeginus juos už Jeruzalės sienų Kidrono atšlaitėse, paliepė jų pelenus nunešti į Betelį.
2Ki 23:4 And the king commanded Hilkiah the high priest, and the priests of the second order, and the keepers of the door, to bring forth out of the temple of the LORD all the vessels that were made for Baal, and for the grove, and for all the host of heaven: and he burned them without Jerusalem in the fields of Kidron, and carried the ashes of them unto Bethel.
2Kar 22:15 Ji pareiškė jiems: "Taip kalbėjo Viešpats, Izraelio Dievas! Pasakykite vyrui, kuris atsiuntė jus pas mane:
2Ki 22:15 And she said unto them, Thus saith the LORD God of Israel, Tell the man that sent you to me,
Jn 7:15 Žydai stebėjosi ir sakė: "Iš kur jis išmano Raštą, visai nesimokęs? "
Jo 7:15 And the Jews marvelled, saying, How knoweth this man letters, having never learned?
Pr 42:29 Parėję į Kanaano kraštą pas savo tėvą Jokūbą, jie papasakojo jam visa, kas buvo atsitikę, sakydami:
Ge 42:29 And they came unto Jacob their father unto the land of Canaan, and told him all that befell unto them; saying,
Ps 78:69 Jis pastatė savo šventovę lyg namus danguje, įtvirtino ją lyg pačią žemę, amžinai tvirtą.
Ps 78:69 And he built his sanctuary like high palaces, like the earth which he hath established for ever.
1Tes 2:20 Taip, jūs esate mūsų garbė ir džiaugsmas!
1Th 2:20 For ye are our glory and joy.
Dan 3:24 Karalius Nebukadnecaras buvo nustebintas. Jis skubiai pakilo ir kreipėsi į savo patarėjus, klausdamas: "Argi ne tris vyrus įmetėme į ugnį surištus? " Jie atsakė karaliui: "Tikrai taip, o karaliau! " ­
Da 3:24 Then Nebuchadnezzar the king was astonied, and rose up in haste, and spake, and said unto his counsellors, Did not we cast three men bound into the midst of the fire? They answered and said unto the king, True, O king.
Jn 8:54 Jėzus atsakė: "Jei aš save šlovinčiau, manoji šlovė būtų niekai. Bet yra mano Tėvas, kuris mane šlovina, kurį savo Dievu jūs vadinate.
Jo 8:54 Jesus answered, If I honour myself, my honour is nothing: it is my Father that honoureth me; of whom ye say, that he is your God:
Iz 9:10 "Plytos subiro, bet mes statysime iš tašytų akmenų; platanai iškirsti, bet mes vietoj jų imsime kedrus. "
Isa 9:10 The bricks are fallen down, but we will build with hewn stones: the sycomores are cut down, but we will change them into cedars.
1Krn 4:31 Bet Markabotuose, Hacar Susimuose, Bet Biryje ir Šaarimuose. Tai buvo jų miestai, kol Dovydas tapo karaliumi.
1Ch 4:31 And at Bethmarcaboth, and Hazarsusim, and at Bethbirei, and at Shaaraim. These were their cities unto the reign of David.
Sk 5:18 Pastatęs moterį Viešpaties akivaizdoje, kunigas sutaršys moters plaukus ir paduos jai į rankas priminimo javų atnašą, kuri yra pavydo javų atnaša. O savo paties rankoje kunigas laikys kartybės vandenį, nešantį prakeikimą.
Nu 5:18 And the priest shall set the woman before the LORD, and uncover the woman's head, and put the offering of memorial in her hands, which is the jealousy offering: and the priest shall have in his hand the bitter water that causeth the curse:
Apd 1:1 Pirmoje knygoje , Teofili, aš pasakojau apie viską, ką Jėzus nuo pat pradžių veikė ir mokė
Ac 1:1 The former treatise have I made, O Theophilus, of all that Jesus began both to do and teach,
Iš 37:22 Galvutės ir jų šakos buvo iš to paties gabalo, visos nukaltos iš gryno aukso.
Ex 37:22 Their knops and their branches were of the same: all of it was one beaten work of pure gold.
Mt 22:4 Tuomet jis vėl siuntė kitus tarnus, liepdamas: ‘Sakykite pakviestiesiems: štai aš surengiau pokylį, mano jaučiai ir penimi veršiai papjauti, ir viskas surengta. Ateikite į vestuves! ’
Mat 22:4 Again, he sent forth other servants, saying, Tell them which are bidden, Behold, I have prepared my dinner: my oxen and my fatlings are killed, and all things are ready: come unto the marriage.

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