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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Am 4:7 Nors sulaikiau virš jūsų lietų, kai iki pjūties dar buvo trys mėnesiai, vienam miestui daviau lietaus, o kitam nedaviau, vienas laukas buvo lietaus palaistytas, o kitas be lietaus išdžiūvo,
Am 4:7 And also I have withholden the rain from you, when there were yet three months to the harvest: and I caused it to rain upon one city, and caused it not to rain upon another city: one piece was rained upon, and the piece whereupon it rained not withered.
1Kar 11:42 Jeruzalėje Saliamonas valdė visą Izraelį keturiasdešimt metų.
1Ki 11:42 And the time that Solomon reigned in Jerusalem over all Israel was forty years.
Job 6:25 Kokie įtaigūs tiesūs žodžiai! Bet ką reiškia jūsų įrodinėjimai?
Job 6:25 How forcible are right words! but what doth your arguing reprove?
Kun 4:33 Jis uždės ranką ant galvos aukai už nuodėmę, ir ji bus papjauta toje vietoje, kur pjaunamos deginamosios aukos.
Le 4:33 And he shall lay his hand upon the head of the sin offering, and slay it for a sin offering in the place where they kill the burnt offering.
2Kor 12:8 Todėl aš jau tris kartus maldavau Viešpatį, kad atitolintų jį nuo manęs.
2C 12:8 For this thing I besought the Lord thrice, that it might depart from me.
Dan 2:4 Chaldėjai atsakė karaliui aramėjiškai : "O karaliau! Gyvuok amžinai! Papasakok tą sapną savo tarnams, ir mes pasakysime, ką jis reiškia. "
Da 2:4 Then spake the Chaldeans to the king in Syriack, O king, live for ever: tell thy servants the dream, and we will shew the interpretation.
Mt 26:7 atėjo moteris, alebastriniu brangaus kvapiojo aliejaus indu nešina ir jam sėdinčiam prie stalo išpylė ant galvos.
Mat 26:7 There came unto him a woman having an alabaster box of very precious ointment, and poured it on his head, as he sat at meat.
1Kar 7:48 Saliamonas padarė visus reikmenis Viešpaties Namams: aukurą iš aukso, padėtinės duonos stalą iš aukso,
1Ki 7:48 And Solomon made all the vessels that pertained unto the house of the LORD: the altar of gold, and the table of gold, whereupon the shewbread was,
Žyd 3:18 O kam prisiekė, jog neįžengs į jo atilsio šalį, jei ne tiems, kurie jo neklausė? !
He 3:18 And to whom sware he that they should not enter into his rest, but to them that believed not?
Apd 12:6 Paskutinę naktį prieš Erodui išduodant Petrą, tasai, supančiotas dviem grandinėmis, miegojo tarp dviejų kareivių. Prie durų sargybiniai sergėjo kalėjimą.
Ac 12:6 And when Herod would have brought him forth, the same night Peter was sleeping between two soldiers, bound with two chains: and the keepers before the door kept the prison.
Pr 2:18 Dievas tarė: "Negera žmogui būti vienam. Padarysiu jam tinkamą bendrininką. "
Ge 2:18 And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
Mt 3:4 Pats Jonas vilkėjo kupranugario vilnų apdaru, o strėnas buvo susijuosęs odiniu diržu. Jo maistas buvo skėriai ir lauko medus.
Mat 3:4 And the same John had his raiment of camel's hair, and a leathern girdle about his loins; and his meat was locusts and wild honey.
Sk 17:2 "Kalbėk izraelitams ir gauk iš jų dvylika lazdų, iš visų jų protėvių namų vadų po vieną kiekvieniems protėvių namams. Įrašyk kiekvieno vyro vardą ant jo lazdos.
Nu 17:2 Speak unto the children of Israel, and take of every one of them a rod according to the house of their fathers, of all their princes according to the house of their fathers twelve rods: write thou every man's name upon his rod.
3Jn 1:6 Jie ir paliudijo Bažnyčiai apie tavo meilę. Tu puikiai padarysi, išruošdamas juos į kelionę taip, kaip Dievui patinka.
3J 1:6 Which have borne witness of thy charity before the church: whom if thou bring forward on their journey after a godly sort, thou shalt do well:
Zch 13:8 Visame krašte, ­ tai Viešpaties žodis, ­du trečdaliai bus sunaikinti ir žus, o vienas trečdalis liks.
Zec 13:8 And it shall come to pass, that in all the land, saith the LORD, two parts therein shall be cut off and die; but the third shall be left therein.
Įst 13:1 Jei pasirodytų tarp jūsų pranašas ar sapnuotojas, duotų tau kokį ženklą ar padarytų stebuklą
De 13:1 If there arise among you a prophet, or a dreamer of dreams, and giveth thee a sign or a wonder,
Įst 28:9 Viešpats padarys tave savo šventa tauta, kaip yra tau prisiekęs, jei laikysiesi Viešpaties, savo Dievo, įsakymų ir eisi jo keliais.
De 28:9 The LORD shall establish thee an holy people unto himself, as he hath sworn unto thee, if thou shalt keep the commandments of the LORD thy God, and walk in his ways.
Ts 10:11 Viešpats tarė izraelitams: "Argi neišgelbėjau jūsų nuo egiptiečių, amoritų, amonitų ir filistinų?
Judg 10:11 And the LORD said unto the children of Israel, Did not I deliver you from the Egyptians, and from the Amorites, from the children of Ammon, and from the Philistines?
Ts 20:16 Tarp šių karių buvo septyni šimtai rinktinių vyrų, kurie buvo kairiarankiai. Kiekvienas jų galėjo sviesti svaidykle akmenį į plauką ir pataikyti.
Judg 20:16 Among all this people there were seven hundred chosen men lefthanded; every one could sling stones at an hair breadth, and not miss.
Jer 46:19 Pasidaryk ryšulius tremčiai, dukterie Egipte! Nofas virs dykuma, apleistas, be gyventojų.
Jer 46:19 O thou daughter dwelling in Egypt, furnish thyself to go into captivity: for Noph shall be waste and desolate without an inhabitant.

Sanctus Corpus Deus