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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Ps 18:4 Mirties virvės mane pančiojo, pražūties srautai skandino.
Ps 18:4 The sorrows of death compassed me, and the floods of ungodly men made me afraid.
Įst 2:2 Galop Viešpats tarė man:
De 2:2 And the LORD spake unto me, saying,
Sk 24:9 Pritūpęs jis guli tarsi liūtasir liūtė. Kas išdrįs jį prikelti? Palaimintas, kas tave laimina, prakeiktas, kas tave keikia. "
Nu 24:9 He couched, he lay down as a lion, and as a great lion: who shall stir him up? Blessed is he that blesseth thee, and cursed is he that curseth thee.
Job 30:22 Pakeli mane ir užsodini ant vėjo, vėtai mane staugiančioje audroje.
Job 30:22 Thou liftest me up to the wind; thou causest me to ride upon it, and dissolvest my substance.
Iš 25:22 Ten aš susitiksiu su tavimi ir nuo malonės sosto viršaus ­ tarp dviejų kerubų, esančių viršum Sandoros Skrynios ­ pasakysiu tau visa, ką per tave noriu įsakyti izraelitams.
Ex 25:22 And there I will meet with thee, and I will commune with thee from above the mercy seat, from between the two cherubims which are upon the ark of the testimony, of all things which I will give thee in commandment unto the children of Israel.
Lk 24:2 Jos rado akmenį nuritintą nuo kapo,
Lu 24:2 And they found the stone rolled away from the sepulchre.
Ts 1:31 Ašeras neišvarė gyventojų iš Akojo nei iš Sidono, nei iš Achzibo, nei iš Helbos, nei iš Afiko, nei iš Rehobo.
Judg 1:31 Neither did Asher drive out the inhabitants of Accho, nor the inhabitants of Zidon, nor of Ahlab, nor of Achzib, nor of Helbah, nor of Aphik, nor of Rehob:
Job 3:16 Kodėl gi nebuvau palaidotastarsi nelaikšis kūdikis, tarsi mažyliai, niekada nematę šviesos?
Job 3:16 Or as an hidden untimely birth I had not been; as infants which never saw light.
Dan 6:9 Tada karalius pasirašė draudžiamąjį raštą.
Da 6:9 Wherefore king Darius signed the writing and the decree.
Pat 13:1 Išmintingas vaikas brangina tėvo pamokymą, o pašaipūnas nesiklauso, kai būna baramas.
Pr 13:1 A wise son heareth his father's instruction: but a scorner heareth not rebuke.
Neh 9:35 Net savo pačių karalystėje, nepaisydami tavo visokeriopo gerumo, kurį jiems dosniai teikei, plačiame ir derlingame krašte, kurį jiems davei, jie nenorėjo tau tarnautiir nuo savo nedorų darbų nenusigręžė.
Ne 9:35 For they have not served thee in their kingdom, and in thy great goodness that thou gavest them, and in the large and fat land which thou gavest before them, neither turned they from their wicked works.
Ez 9:9 Jis atsakė man: "Izraelio ir Judo namų kaltė be galo didelė. Kraštas pilnas kraujo, o miestas ­ ištvirkimo, nes kalbama: ‘Viešpats paliko kraštą! Viešpats nemato! ’
Eze 9:9 Then said he unto me, The iniquity of the house of Israel and Judah is exceeding great, and the land is full of blood, and the city full of perverseness: for they say, The LORD hath forsaken the earth, and the LORD seeth not.
Ps 35:14 tartum būčiau meldęsis už savo bičiulį ar brolį. Klajojau neramus, lyg motiną apraudodamas, gedulo prislėgtas.
Ps 35:14 I behaved myself as though he had been my friend or brother: I bowed down heavily, as one that mourneth for his mother.
2Krn 13:12 Žiūrėkite, Dievas su mumis, mūsų priekyje, ir jo kunigai su trimitais pasiruošę pašaukti į kovą prieš jus. Izraelitai, nekovokite su Viešpačiu, savo protėvių Dievu, nes sėkmė jūsų nelydės! "
2Ch 13:12 And, behold, God himself is with us for our captain, and his priests with sounding trumpets to cry alarm against you. O children of Israel, fight ye not against the LORD God of your fathers; for ye shall not prosper.
Jer 7:25 Nuo tos dienos, kai jūsų tėvai išėjo iš Egipto žemės, ligi šiandien primygtinai vis siunčiau ir siunčiau jums savo tarnus pranašus.
Jer 7:25 Since the day that your fathers came forth out of the land of Egypt unto this day I have even sent unto you all my servants the prophets, daily rising up early and sending them:
1Sam 26:8 "Šiandien Viešpats įdavė tau į rankas tavo priešą! ­ tarė Abišajas Dovydui. ­ Leisk man vienu ieties smūgiu prismeigti jį prie žemės. Dusyk smogti man nereikės. "
1Sa 26:8 Then said Abishai to David, God hath delivered thine enemy into thine hand this day: now therefore let me smite him, I pray thee, with the spear even to the earth at once, and I will not smite him the second time.
Iz 18:5 Dar prieš vynuogių rinkimą, žiedams nužydėjusir vynuogių kekėms ėmus sirpti, jis genekliu apgenės šakelesir šalin numes nupjaustytus metūglius.
Isa 18:5 For afore the harvest, when the bud is perfect, and the sour grape is ripening in the flower, he shall both cut off the sprigs with pruning hooks, and take away and cut down the branches.
2Kar 25:13 Vario stulpus, esančius Viešpaties Namuose, pastovus ir vario jūrą, buvusią Viešpaties Namuose, chaldėjai sudaužė ir visą varį išgabeno į Babiloną.
2Ki 25:13 And the pillars of brass that were in the house of the LORD, and the bases, and the brasen sea that was in the house of the LORD, did the Chaldees break in pieces, and carried the brass of them to Babylon.
Pr 31:51 Labanas tarė Jokūbui: "Žiūrėk, štai šis kauburys yra paminklas, kurį pastačiau tarp tavęs ir savęs.
Ge 31:51 And Laban said to Jacob, Behold this heap, and behold this pillar, which I have cast betwixt me and thee:
Iz 30:27 Žiūrėk! Viešpaties vardas ateina iš toli, degdamas rūstybe, ant žemę gaubiančių debesų! Jo lūpos pilnos pykčio, o liežuvis ­ it viską ryjanti ugnis.
Isa 30:27 Behold, the name of the LORD cometh from far, burning with his anger, and the burden thereof is heavy: his lips are full of indignation, and his tongue as a devouring fire:

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