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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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Sk 1:19 Kaip Viešpats buvo Mozei įsakęs, taip jis ir surašė juos Sinajaus dykumoje.
Nu 1:19 As the LORD commanded Moses, so he numbered them in the wilderness of Sinai.
Lk 12:26 Tad jei jūs neįstengiate padaryti net mažmožio, tai kam rūpinatės kitais dalykais?
Lu 12:26 If ye then be not able to do that thing which is least, why take ye thought for the rest?
Jer 28:2 "Taip kalba Galybių Viešpats, Izraelio Dievas: ‘Sulaužiau Babilono karaliaus jungą!
Jer 28:2 Thus speaketh the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel, saying, I have broken the yoke of the king of Babylon.
Apr 16:12 Šeštasis išliejo savo dubenį į didžiąją Eufrato upę, ir jos vanduo išdžiūvo, kad pasidarytų kelias karaliams iš saulėtekio šalies.
Re 16:12 And the sixth angel poured out his vial upon the great river Euphrates; and the water thereof was dried up, that the way of the kings of the east might be prepared.
Ps 95:3 Juk Viešpats ­ didis Dievas, galingas Karalius, aukštesnis už visus dievus.
Ps 95:3 For the LORD is a great God, and a great King above all gods.
Ps 86:5 Juk tu, Viešpatie, geras ir atlaidus, kupinas ištikimos meilės visiems, kurie tavęs šaukiasi.
Ps 86:5 For thou, Lord, art good, and ready to forgive; and plenteous in mercy unto all them that call upon thee.
Job 6:2 "Ak, kad mano širdgėla būtų pasverta, ir visos mano negandos padėtos ant svarstyklių!
Job 6:2 Oh that my grief were throughly weighed, and my calamity laid in the balances together!
Pr 44:18 Judas priėjo prie jo ir tarė: "Prašyčiau, mano viešpatie, leisti tavo tarnui kreiptis į tave, ir nesupyk ant savo tarno, nes esi lygus faraonui.
Ge 44:18 Then Judah came near unto him, and said, Oh my lord, let thy servant, I pray thee, speak a word in my lord's ears, and let not thine anger burn against thy servant: for thou art even as Pharaoh.
Ez 21:20 Nužymėk kelią kalavijui eiti į Amono Rabą ar į Judą ir įtvirtintąją Jeruzalę.
Eze 21:20 Appoint a way, that the sword may come to Rabbath of the Ammonites, and to Judah in Jerusalem the defenced.
Zch 3:3 Mat Jozuė stovėjo priešais angelą, vilkėdamas purvinais drabužiais.
Zec 3:3 Now Joshua was clothed with filthy garments, and stood before the angel.
Pr 41:49 Juozapas rinko grūdus tokiais dideliais kiekiais lyg pajūrio smėlį, kad liovėsi juos net seikėti, nes nebebuvo įmanoma suseikėti.
Ge 41:49 And Joseph gathered corn as the sand of the sea, very much, until he left numbering; for it was without number.
Ps 37:37 ש Brangink nuoširdų žmogų, įsižiūrėk į dorą, nes taikus žmogus turi ateitį.
Ps 37:37 Mark the perfect man, and behold the upright: for the end of that man is peace.
Jn 15:5 Aš esu vynmedis, o jūs šakelės. Kas pasilieka manyje ir aš jame, tas duoda daug vaisių; nuo manęs atsiskyrę, jūs negalite nieko nuveikti.
Jo 15:5 I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing.
1Sam 27:8 Dovydas ir jo vyrai eidavo ir užpuldavo gešūriečius, girzus ir amalekiečius ­ tautas, gyvenusias krašte nuo Telamo iki pat Šūro ir Egipto žemės.
1Sa 27:8 And David and his men went up, and invaded the Geshurites, and the Gezrites, and the Amalekites: for those nations were of old the inhabitants of the land, as thou goest to Shur, even unto the land of Egypt.
Est 5:2 Kai tik jis pamatė karalienę Esterą, stovinčią kieme, ji rado malonę jo akyse. Karalius ištiesė Esterai aukso skeptrą, kurį laikė rankoje. Priėjusi prie jo, Estera palietė skeptro galą.
Es 5:2 And it was so, when the king saw Esther the queen standing in the court, that she obtained favour in his sight: and the king held out to Esther the golden sceptre that was in his hand. So Esther drew near, and touched the top of the sceptre.
Joz 5:7 Taigi jų vaikus, kuriuos jis užaugino vietoj jų, Jozuė apipjaustė, nes jie buvo neapipjaustyti. Kelionėje jie nebuvo buvę apipjaustyti.
Jos 5:7 And their children, whom he raised up in their stead, them Joshua circumcised: for they were uncircumcised, because they had not circumcised them by the way.
Iz 52:15 taip daugelis tautų bus jo nustebintos, o karaliai stovės netekę žado. Jie išvys, ko niekada nebuvo jiems apsakyta, ir suvoks, ko niekada nebuvo girdėję. "
Isa 52:15 So shall he sprinkle many nations; the kings shall shut their mouths at him: for that which had not been told them shall they see; and that which they had not heard shall they consider.
Pr 10:2 Jafeto palikuonys: Gomeras, Magogas, Madajas, Javanas, Tubalas, Mešechas ir Tyras.
Ge 10:2 The sons of Japheth; Gomer, and Magog, and Madai, and Javan, and Tubal, and Meshech, and Tiras.
Iš 4:16 Iš tikrųjų jis žmonėms kalbės už tave: jis bus tau kaip lūpos, o tu jam būsi kaip Dievas.
Ex 4:16 And he shall be thy spokesman unto the people: and he shall be, even he shall be to thee instead of a mouth, and thou shalt be to him instead of God.
Ps 42:4 Kai išlieju savo širdį, prisimindamas, kaip eidavau su minia į Dievo Namus, vesdamas ją iškilmės eitynių spūstyjesu džiugiais šlovės šauksmais!
Ps 42:4 When I remember these things, I pour out my soul in me: for I had gone with the multitude, I went with them to the house of God, with the voice of joy and praise, with a multitude that kept holyday.

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