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Try not to play with this holy e-confession equipment, because God will punish you.

E-Confession
E-Confession

Prompted by Vatican's idea to use Internet for spreading God's word, we have decided to provide confession service through Internet to sinners, who are visiting our website. We hope that we will be able to save a few souls from Satan's snares. Anonymity is guaranteed. Connection with priest encoded by the algorithm of Holy Spirit. We will help you to perform this sacred duty of every person and you will be able to redeem your sins and repent of the evils committed without leaving comfort of your home. Your confession will be sent directly to our computerized confessional. The program will calculate your sins, evaluate their heaviness and will assign punishment. All electronic devices have been sanctified and the program is developed in strict accordance with all religious canons and rules. Since everything will be calculate by machinery and artificial intelligence, we can guarantee the most objective and unbiased evaluation.

1. Specify how many times you sinned of particular sin.
2. Choose whether you are a priest, Christian or unbeliever.
3. Press the button at the bottom and you will receive punishments.

God ensures greater grace and forgiveness for priests, because their life is hard and committed. As a result, intercourse with children, even sexually, for priests is not a big deal or significant sin. It is more like holy sex education for children. But for godless people similar sin burden is high. God will not forgive them for the slightest dirt. For infidelities and for not kissing hands of priests God will tear out eyes, will rip off legs and hands, will burn in eternal fire of Hell, you infidel muck! So accept the Lord and He will teach you, scum, some heavenly love and true spiritual values​​, not your atheistic descent and moral degradation, in which you are without God, our Father.

If you have divine feeling that our system is missing some sins or punishments, you can leave your suggestions in our Forums or Comments section.

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1Kar 10:10 Tada ji apdovanojo karalių šimtu dvidešimt talentų aukso, daugybe kvepalų ir brangakmenių. Daugiau niekada nebuvo atgabenta tiek kvepalų, kiek Šebos karalienė padovanojo karaliui Saliamonui.
1Ki 10:10 And she gave the king an hundred and twenty talents of gold, and of spices very great store, and precious stones: there came no more such abundance of spices as these which the queen of Sheba gave to king Solomon.
Ps 78:22 nes jie netikėjo Dievunei pasitikėjo jo gelbstinčia galybe.
Ps 78:22 Because they believed not in God, and trusted not in his salvation:
Jer 50:14 Rikiuokitės aplink Babiloną mūšiui, kilpininkai, leiskite į jį strėles, netaupykite, nes jis nusidėjo Viešpačiui.
Jer 50:14 Put yourselves in array against Babylon round about: all ye that bend the bow, shoot at her, spare no arrows: for she hath sinned against the LORD.
Mk 15:45 Patyręs tai iš šimtininko, jis atidavė Juozapui kūną.
Mar 15:45 And when he knew it of the centurion, he gave the body to Joseph.
Iz 23:12 Ir tarė jis: "Nebedžiūgausi daugiau, mergele, Sidono dukterie; tu patekai priespaudon. Nors pakiltum ir nukeliautum į Kitimų kraštą, ramybės ir ten tau nebus.
Isa 23:12 And he said, Thou shalt no more rejoice, O thou oppressed virgin, daughter of Zidon: arise, pass over to Chittim; there also shalt thou have no rest.
Jer 48:29 Girdėjome apie Moabo išdidumą ­jis labai išdidus, ­girdėjome apie jo puikybę, įžūlų išdidumą, širdies pasipūtimą.
Jer 48:29 We have heard the pride of Moab, (he is exceeding proud) his loftiness, and his arrogancy, and his pride, and the haughtiness of his heart.
Dan 5:20 Bet kadangi jo širdis išpuiko ir jo dvasia surambėjo iš įžūlumo, jis buvo nuverstas nuo karaliaus sosto, ir iš jo buvo atimta garbė.
Da 5:20 But when his heart was lifted up, and his mind hardened in pride, he was deposed from his kingly throne, and they took his glory from him:
2Sam 13:39 Ilgėdamasis Abšalomo, karalius Dovydas liovėsi širsti, nes po Amnono mirties jau buvo aprimęs.
2Sa 13:39 And the soul of king David longed to go forth unto Absalom: for he was comforted concerning Amnon, seeing he was dead.
Mk 10:18 Jėzus tarė: "Kam vadini mane geru? Niekas nėra geras, tik vienas Dievas.
Mar 10:18 And Jesus said unto him, Why callest thou me good? there is none good but one, that is, God.
2Kor 11:18 Kadangi daug kas giriasi kūno dalykais, tai pasigirsiu ir aš.
2C 11:18 Seeing that many glory after the flesh, I will glory also.
2Sam 16:5 Karaliui atėjus į Bahurimus, išėjo iš ten žmogus, vardu Šimis, Geros sūnus iš tos pačios kilties kaip Sauliaus šeima, šaukdamas keiksmą po keiksmo.
2Sa 16:5 And when king David came to Bahurim, behold, thence came out a man of the family of the house of Saul, whose name was Shimei, the son of Gera: he came forth, and cursed still as he came.
1Krn 18:9 Hamato karalius Touvas, išgirdęs, kad Dovydas nugalėjo visą Cobos karaliaus Hadadezero kariuomenę,
1Ch 18:9 Now when Tou king of Hamath heard how David had smitten all the host of Hadarezer king of Zobah;
Apd 22:15 nes tu visiems žmonėms paliudysi, ką esi regėjęs ir girdėjęs.
Ac 22:15 For thou shalt be his witness unto all men of what thou hast seen and heard.
Pr 22:18 visos tautos žemėje gaus palaiminimą per tavo palikuonis, nes tu buvai klusnus mano balsui. "
Ge 22:18 And in thy seed shall all the nations of the earth be blessed; because thou hast obeyed my voice.
Lk 23:53 Paskui nuėmė kūną nuo kryžiaus, įvyniojo į drobulę ir paguldė uoloje iškaltame kapo rūsyje, kuriame dar niekas nebuvo laidotas.
Lu 23:53 And he took it down, and wrapped it in linen, and laid it in a sepulchre that was hewn in stone, wherein never man before was laid.
Apd 16:2 Kadangi Listros ir Ikonijaus broliai apie jį gražiai liudijo,
Ac 16:2 Which was well reported of by the brethren that were at Lystra and Iconium.
Apd 15:35 Paulius ir Barnabas pasiliko Antiochijoje. Kartu su daugeliu kitų jie mokė ir skelbė Viešpaties žodžio gerąją naujieną.
Ac 15:35 Paul also and Barnabas continued in Antioch, teaching and preaching the word of the Lord, with many others also.
2Sam 8:7 Dovydas paėmė Hadadezero palydos nešiotus aukso skydus ir pargabeno į Jeruzalę.
2Sa 8:7 And David took the shields of gold that were on the servants of Hadadezer, and brought them to Jerusalem.
1Kor 12:29 Argi visi apaštalai? ar visi pranašai? ar visi mokytojai? ar visi stebukladariai?
1C 12:29 Are all apostles? are all prophets? are all teachers? are all workers of miracles?
Sk 11:8 Žmonės vaikščiodavo po apylinkę, rinkdavo ją, maldavo girnomis ar trindavo grūstuve, virdavo puode ir darydavo plokštainius. Jos skonis buvo panašus į plokštainių su aliejumi.
Nu 11:8 And the people went about, and gathered it, and ground it in mills, or beat it in a mortar, and baked it in pans, and made cakes of it: and the taste of it was as the taste of fresh oil.

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